Feel like I’m in a weird limbo, I’ve got better at not ruminating on my obsession but I can still feel it in my mind? Like something always in the corner of my eye that I shouldn’t look directly at. Could it be my meds starting to work or am I still ruminating?
It’s low grade ocd as I call it. Even when we feel Better we still feel the. tug…
@vgb Yes it’s this, feels like a knot or the mildest ice cream headache
Yes, I am currently battling this! I got myself out of the OCD hell pit, but I still experience the physical sensations I used to get alongside thought ruminations, but without the actual thought. I also get the feeling that I have unfinished business or unsolved problems, so to speak, and my brain starts trying to find a rumination to obsess over. My head has been pretty quiet, but all of the slight feelings are still there.
@ExpertParakeet Yeah this sounds like it! For me I’m still very easily set off but I can get it in control easily but if I get stressed about something else it comes kind of undone. I wish there was something more to do though cos I still feel like I’m not thinking of anything else? But there’s a physical feeling that’s hard to let slide
@MillenialUK Yes, those lingering physical sensations are terrible. I continue to hope they’ll go away like the thoughts eventually kinda did. I am deploying the same ERP tactics that I used for the thought ruminations.
@ExpertParakeet Exactly it’s like water flowing in a river and doesn’t know how to avoid the tributary…. lol. Is that the right term????
@ExpertParakeet What did u do erp wise for thought rumination? Please and thanks
@vgb Here’s a huge list I have saved in my phone for stuff that’s helped me: 1. Repeating the mantra in my head, “I accept the uncertainty of this thought.” 2. Repeating the second mantra of “I will handle it then if it happens” in response to my brain if it continues to ruminate after accepting the uncertainty. Repeat 1 and 2 over and over again, as needed. 3. Magnesium citrate, 2x daily 4. Exercise 5. Meditation (I’ve only done this two times, but it has made a difference) 6. My loved ones have been lovingly ignoring me when I ask for reassurance—this has been helpful in conditioning me to sit alone with anxious thoughts 7. Putting my phone in another room close to bedtime and not touching it until morning to prevent late night Googling compulsions 8. Trying to work closely with coworkers for tasks that prevent me from hiding out in my office and Googling compulsions 9. Picking up an old hobby that demands a lot of brain/hand power (I am playing banjo these days) 10. Getting off as much social media as I can 11. Consuming distracting and fun content when I am actually online (I like YouTube cooking videos, kpop, and Jenna Marbles)—avoiding anything political (RedPill content *really* triggered my ROCD and scrupulous OCD themes) 12. Having a sense of community and belonging here with you guys 13. Being open with loved ones about my OCD, but only things that I am *100%* comfortable with sharing (YOU ARE ENTITLED TO YOUR PRIVACY) 14. Unconditional acceptance that I am not an inherently evil person and that I am deserving of love 15. Understanding that if my worst fears did come true, then I am strong enough to handle them! 16. Ali Greymond on YouTube 17. Heidi Priebe on YouTube
Thanks so much!!!!!!!!!!! What’s up with magnesium citrate? I love your itemized steps. I’m going to write them down so I can refer to them and use them regularly 💘
I feel like the thoughts are telling me, "You want this, you want to be attracted to kids" when I know that's not the case. I've been stuck ruminating for the past couple of days and I'm so worried about this disorder convincing me that I'm something I've never been. I try not to fight it, but when I don't it feels like I'm giving into it like it's true. The meds I'm on keep me from being super depressed, but it's still there. I feel like I'm going to act on my thoughts one day and it worries me. I don't feel like myself anymore and I don't know if this is progress or a relapse. Even when having intercourse with my partner, I had to thought block because the thoughts were images while in the middle of it. Then afterwards, they came flooding in saying that I was doing it as a distraction. I don't know what else to do. I try to pinpoint all of my triggers, but sometimes I don't think I even have any. I feel like a monster. I'm honestly scared.
I have really started to take control of my compulsions and im starting to string together better days! Still not great days or even good, but they are better!!! I have controlled my outward compulsions (googling, research, reassurance, checking) the past couple of days and felt the positive impact of that. But unfortunately, I am realizing that the rumination is still constant. My sexuality and relationship are the only two things constantly on my brain, and if they aren’t I freak out and wonder why im not thinking about them! Anyone have any advice on how to deal with the rumination. Sometimes I don’t even notice im doing it, but it’s taking up 90% of my day. Once I start to tackle this I think I may make some real big progress! Hope everyone is fighting today! ❤️
I've been doing well the past month in cutting down on compulsions and have been feeling better however, last night I had a set back that carried on into today. I had gotten very poor sleep (4ish hours) and then something triggered my memory. I think with the sudden anxiety spike and lack of sleep I didn't have the strength to ignore my compulsions. Last night and today I've realised I've gone back into rumination and mentally reviewing the event excessively again and comparing my situation to other people's, but most of the times that I start going down these rabbit holes I don't even realise I'm doing it? Also been fixating a bit on the fear that I've ruined my progress and that I will fall back into the deep end of it all again, that I have done so much work getting myself out of, although trying my best to not be too discouraged. Does anyone have any advice on how to deal with rumination more specifically?
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