POCD

hi everyone, i’m new to this app and it’s taken me a lot of courage to even post this or publicly say anything regarding my OCD because i feel so much shame and guilt and distress because of my POCD intrusive thoughts. it’s one of the most draining, most anxiety filled things ive ever been through. i’ve had OCD since i was little. i’ve had different themes ranging from my sexuality to health ( i still struggle with health OCD ) from awful morbid thoughts about my mother and now i’m having thoughts about children. i’ve been struggling with POCD for maybe almost 2 years and even though i know it’s OCD, im still constantly being mentally reminded it is a reflection of me. i keep getting to a point where i feel as if im starting to get better and even though i keep having a strong urge to compulse, i don’t proceed to and it’s been helping a lot. but then i get into a state where i start questioning “ what if i really don’t have OCD and these thoughts are genuinely who i am “ then i give into compulsions to check if im really an awful person. so it feels as if im back to square one. i really need advice and help and i want to know if anyone is experiencing the same thing and how you deal with it. thank you for taking the time to read this :)

Username: drak4drak4

Date posted: 27w ago

this type of theme is often present in OCD... you are definitely not alone... lot of good people has these thoughts and these are not reflection of their character...it is reflection of fear to make something bad... iracional fear of intrusive thoughts... because you would never want to do it, because you know if you could choose you would get rid immediately of these thoughts...you never wanted them in first place... but ocd is doubter...and it cannot be argued into being silent...you could silent it by your courageous acts... that you show ocd what kind of person you really are...that you can be around vulnerable and care for them... that nothing bad is going to happen...then ocd will catch that all of it was false alarm and it will give less bad thoughts...when you engage a lot with these thoughts it is like setting up false alarms... use instead CBT, ACT or MCT methods of therapy... give your attention when some bad thoughts came to your real values and focus of acting according your choosen values in present moment... accept that bad thoughts came to you and also to other people, but do not engage a lot with them with analysis, trying to get rid of them.completely or compulsion...you are great person...these thoughts only say that you are in fear... i hope you find peace and self compassion...

Username: anony_anony_

Date posted: 27w ago

@drak4 thank you so much this means a lot ❤️ thank you

Username: Booklover19Booklover19

Date posted: 27w ago

I am in the thick of this right now and it sucks so much….sometimes I’m so convinced that it’s not OCD and others it’s so clear that it is…..it’s a debilitating disorder that is hard to cope with at times especially with the thoughts, sensations, urges etc. it makes it feel so incredibly real and I absolutely hate it but I’m here for you!❤️

Username: anony_anony_

Date posted: 27w ago

@Booklover19 that is extremely sweet thank you! it’s one of the hardest things i think ive ever gone through, super scary. i’m here for you as well ❤️ we can power through this!

Username: Mitu_001Mitu_001

Date posted: 27w ago

Hi! You are not alone. I also suffer from Pocd and it's terrifing . Congratulations for taking the courage to post this. It takes a lot of courange . I think this is a step to getting better. Congratulations!I am sorry but I cant give you an advice , just that you are not alone ... I am sorry that you go through this... I understand . It's terrifing . I have really bad moments sometimes and keep ruminating but I am trying to think that ocd goes agains our morals . It attacks what we value the most and because of that is that terrifing . I recomand you to watch Chrissie Hodges if you haven't heard of her . It helped me

Username: anony_anony_

Date posted: 27w ago

@Mitu_001 i will definitely search her up! thank you so much ❤️

Username: Mitu_001Mitu_001

Date posted: 27w ago

@anony_ Hope it helps!

Username: Booklover19Booklover19

Date posted: 27w ago

@Mitu_001 I second this! Chrissie Hodges has a lot of good info and is hilarious to boot and kind of makes it light hearted and easier to digest

Username: M315M315

Date posted: 6w ago

@Mitu_001 In literally the exact same boat as you also ❤️ 🛥️ thank you for ALL for posting here. Really gives me so much hope with much current struggle 🌟 I hope someday there comes a time where we can be open about this as sadly not being able to talk about it widely like you can with other subtypes makes it that much harder to deal with sometimes 😓 but until then glad we all have this app to help each other out even if we can’t see or speak to each other irl

Username: iamtryingmybest

Date posted: 45w ago

i need help with pocd (pure o)

hey its been a while since ive last been on this app. tbh my health ocd has gotten a lot better since the last few posts (yay to that!!) but ive been struggling soo much with pocd. i used to struggle w/ intrusive, obsessive thoughts like these before but they werent common and they were bearable. not anymore apparently. im so scared and disgusted at even the idea of having these thoughts, i know i would never actually do something to anyone but i keep on ruminating and its been taking me into mental crisis. anyone that could help? ive been off therapy for 2 months so im thinking that maybe that caused the obsessions to get worse but idrk im 17, about to turn 18 this year. i feel gross

Username: Joshua Bailey

Date posted: 39w ago

POCD

I believe I’ve been suffering from POCD since 2019. Every second of the day I keep telling myself that it’s just my intrusive thoughts and one day I’ll get better but my biggest fear is it isn’t POCD and I’m in denial about who I really am. Anyone know where and how I can get help because I’m really struggling. ❤️

Username: CJW-182

Date posted: 35w ago

POCD

I’ve been struggling with POCD since I was 18 years old, I am now 22. It’s terrifying how quickly it switched from my ocd focusing on a fear of pregnancy, to magical thinking ocd, and then to POCD. I’ve been suffering with it so much so that I’ve convinced myself and have lost friends due to confession compulsions. I have major issues with ruminating, and it frequently goes hand in hand with my relationship OCD and my Suicidal thoughts OCD. (Worrying my partner will leave me because what if I am, and that I can’t take this anymore so I have to __) I often experience things like shame, guilt, grief, and intense emotional pain that manifests itself into nausea and heartburn and sometimes headaches. I’ve tried everything, so this app really is my last resort. I wish to find community here, to know that what I’m facing I’m not alone in my battles with. I know that I’m not, so why does my brain work so hard telling me I am? I love children, I always have. But I get so afraid of being near them. I want to get better. I want to be able to spend time with my family again.

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