my ocd abt losing feelings for my bf is so bad its been so bad the last like 2 weeks i just have this off feeling constantly because of it i just wanna feel normal what can i do to just shake it off please help
Im still trying to figure this out too but try to let go of feeling normal, feelings come and go sometimes you wont feel love for your bf sometimes you will its okay to fluctuate, trying to find positive feelings only reinforces the negative ones
@charissepisces2021 but usually i can choose love and feel something like reassuring just bcs i chose to love but rn i cant even feel that and i fele like thats convincing me its more real i just hate this feeling like i genuinely want to be happy but i cant
@Anonymous Im kind of in the same boat i feel like my bf isnt right for me and someone else will make me happy, but then if i actually accept breaking up with them i feel really sad and dont want to, but then when its just another day i feel disconnected to him and numb. I am afraid im faking it and im afraid i will hurt him. I do feel those love feeling sometimes but lately ive been sad and scared all the time and i feel like he doesnt deserve this but at the same time im scared he doesnt love me... so idk what to do
@charissepisces2021 literally exactly me and even when i do feel in love w him bcs the ocd is there it j feels forced and fake like i wish i could just feel how i used to before the ocd and i always question like if im attracted to other guys but i don't want to be but i notice them more bcs of my ocd but i dont want to like i just want to love this one guy :(
@Anonymous Omg i am the same exact way. Im like waiting for the love to feel real. Even when it feels real for a sec, i immediately question myself if it is actually real or if im just lying to myself and how do i know if the feeling is even real.. and then i look at other guys and wonder if they would be better or if this relationship will actually last based on these toxic traits... like im literally so scared that this relationship isnt positive enough to last bc everything feels fake. Or there are moments where i feel like i am supposed to love him and i dont feel it and it makes me so anxious.
@charissepisces2021 ME TOOOO like genuinely it sucks so badly bcs i used to feel the real love then all of a sudden it just hit me w the ocd idk why and what happened its awful and i question everything either all our fighting or just my feelings like how do i even fight this
@Anonymous Ugh and then i pull away bc i dont know what else to do and its so obvious i feel so horrible like why cant i just be normal :( in the very very beginning omg i felt so much love for him i felt like he was perfect in every way and thinking back on that makes me feel better but then its like why cant i feel that nowwww
@charissepisces2021 OH MY GOD ME TOO ME EXACTLY like i felt genhinely ecstatic like ive never loved someone like that and sll of a sudden the ocd hit and i can never get that back like i am begging and pleading to feel that way again and i just cant and in my hesd theres a million different things that r tryingt o convince me i don't love him like this is so painful
@Anonymous and i feel so disconnected from him too even when im sitting with him im just analyzing my feelings or lack of feelings and then bcs im fixating on trying to feel smt i feel nothing then bcs i feel nothing i question if i even like him its so hard
@Anonymous THANK GOD ugh i feel like such an anomaly... i feel like im not a good person to gf and i try my best but idk how much longer i can hold out :( the worst part is is that they cant really do anything about it like i feel like its up to me to get better and figure it out but i just cant figure it out... idek what to do. I feel literally nothing like ill try to smile it feels fake. I guess im jyst gonna keeo trying to let go, to just accept the uncertainty. It just seems like the ocd comes back like 2 sec after that. Its so hard
@charissepisces2021 no literallt i cant let go of the thoughts cuz i can not accept the possibility of me not liking him like genuinely it feels liek the end of the world and j now i forced myself to watch a vid on tik tok of smt that wld trigger other types of ocd i havw and i j acknowledged that some guy was attractive and i got mad at myself like i never wanns think abt that shit
Lately, I’ve been feeling so disconnected from my boyfriend, and I don’t understand why. When I look at him, it feels like I’m looking at a stranger, and my mind keeps telling me that I don’t like him, that I never really loved him, or that I was just attached and comfortable. It feels real, and that terrifies me. I know logically that ROCD makes me overanalyze every little feeling, but it doesn’t make this any easier. I keep waiting to feel something—love, excitement, even relief—but instead, I just feel numb and distant. When we talk, I feel weird. When he kisses me, I don’t feel much. I keep thinking, ‘If I really loved him, wouldn’t I feel something?’ And the fact that I don’t just fuels my anxiety even more. It scares me that I can’t remember how I felt before ROCD took over. I look at old pictures, and my brain tells me, ‘That wasn’t real, you were just excited to have a relationship.’ And because I can’t access those feelings right now, it makes me doubt everything even more. I also feel guilty because my boyfriend is so loving and patient, but I feel like I’m hurting him. He tells me he doesn’t feel loved by me anymore, and I hate that I can’t just snap out of this and be the way I was before. It’s exhausting. I don’t know what’s real anymore. I keep checking how I feel every second, and it just makes me feel worse. I know that’s a compulsion, but it’s so hard to stop. I keep searching for certainty, but no answer satisfies me. Even when I try to accept the uncertainty, my mind screams, ‘But what if you don’t love him? What if you’re just lying to yourself?’ I want to be present with him. I want to feel love naturally again. But I don’t know how to get there, and it’s terrifying.”
I just saw my boyfriend, and even though everything was okay on the outside, inside my mind it was a storm. I kept having thoughts like: “You don’t like him.” “You’re not feeling anything.” “You’re pretending.” “You don’t care.” And then, he said something sweet — something that should’ve made me feel happy: “We should marry.” And instead of warmth, I felt anxiety. A pit in my stomach. A voice in my head saying: “You don’t want that.” “You’ll never stay with him.” “If you really loved him, you’d feel joy.” And I hate it. I hate that I’m in this state. I don’t feel connected. I don’t feel clarity. I don’t even know what I feel anymore. I just feel… numb. And the worst part? It feels like I don’t even care. But I know I do. Somewhere, beneath all the noise and panic and obsessive thoughts, I care. I want to feel close to him. I want to stop second-guessing every word, every touch, every thought. This is ROCD. It makes me question everything. It makes me feel like I’m lying — even when I’m not. It steals the moments that should feel warm and turns them into confusion. If anyone else feels this awful mix of numbness, fear, and guilt — please tell me I’m not alone.
hi! I broke a short period of doing well without compulsions because I got triggered again. Before this, I had about two calmer days where I didn’t spiral so much, but now everything feels worse. I’m scared that I don’t love my boyfriend as much as I used to, or that this relationship is making me feel stuck or sad. He’s a wonderful person, and I hate thinking this way. I smelled a perfume that used to make me feel calm and in love, and now it just makes me question everything. I spent hours last night searching Reddit, especially on r/ROCD, trying to see if someone is like me or if anyone has answers. I keep rereading posts, hoping I’ll feel certain about what I should do. But I just feel more confused. I keep thinking, “What if I heal and then realize I don’t love him?” or “What if I’m only staying because I feel safe with him or I’m used to him?” I feel numb sometimes, or like I’m pretending, and I hate it. I want to feel love and clarity again. I don’t know what’s real or what’s ROCD anymore. I just feel lost and afraid. I talk to hi. now and i feel so strange like i dont want to force myself i want to like him i dont understand what i feel i feel so weird in my chest
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