Pocd

I am finally meeting with a therpaist. Been really helpful. Only meet once a week but some days i get overwhelmed. Its so hard being a parent with pocd. I love my child and wouldnt do anything to hurt them. In fact im very caring and protective. I still get pocd thoughts like when im helping my wife bathe our child or dress them or chsnge their diaper and my hand moves down or in any direction my ocd freaks out saying i was trying to touch inappropriatelt or do something. Its totally ego dystonic and extremely heartbreaking. I sometimes avoid my daddy duties because of it. Tomight i was helping my wife bathe and clothe our child because theyre both sick. As i was doing that i looked away for a second and my hand moved amd i worried was i trying to touch her. Then the ocd what if and doubts and guilt feelimgs came rushing amd it makes me not want to be around my own family its so distressimg. I just want to help my partner and be a good father 😂💔

Anonymous

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 1y

Mate , keep your head up it’s hard ! I know trust me , try exposing yourself a little bit I know it’s distressing and very hard but the further your avoid things the harder things get , I struggle with harm ocd and pocd (pocd) by far the worst , I’ve not been with my child’s mother for around 6/7 months when we separated my ocd was rife and I couldn’t escape it , I had panick attacks every day , violence , murder , sexual assault anything u can think of I’ve thought it , having a hard day today had some intrusive thoughts , it’s just me and my daughter today , so currently where in the bathroom and she’s in the bath playing splish splash , I’ve got to wash her and get her ready by myself , in my worst times I had a lot of avoidance , I had my mother stay of work so I wasn’t alone with my child, only reason I’m saying this is because there really is hope , I still struggle every day but I force myself to do things I’m not comfortable with , bath my daughter etc , POCD is crippling and it can definitely take control over your life. You HAVE to push and keep pushing , stop avoidance don’t gain reassurance n just beat your bully up , I’m not trying to switch things over to my story I just want to give you abit of hope and know that your not alone ❤️ I can tell from what you have wrote that you are a great genuine caring father and just being on this app alone is a huge step to progress ! I’m so sorry your dealing with this right now , I promise it’s not a forever thing , if you would like to talk privately

Anonymous

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 1y

Then just lmk , I hope I’ve not give to much reassurance I just don’t want you to feel alone , it’s so so hard even writing this I’ve got intrusive thoughts happening , your brains a crazy place to be when your not well !! Just keep your head up fella your doing what u can and that’s all that counts ❤️

Anonymous

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 1y

I also apologise for what’s I’ve just said as well because where not all in the same position , exposures by yourself might be very hard n distressing so don’t just jump in full force , try to talk to people you trust , plz plz plz don’t feel alone my heart is here for you ❤️

Anonynmous19

Date posted: 1y

@Anonymous Thanks man. I appreciate the support an encouragement. Your story inspires me so thank you. Wishing you peace brother

Scorpio1

Date posted: 1y

I have the same problem when I go to close to children it freaks me out and makes me feel bad

Bradinrichard2

Date posted: 21w

Pocd

I’ve always had ocd. But never experienced pocd until after I got pregnant and was fixing to deliver. Anyone else? I’ve been struggling with this for almost 2 years 😩 and Prozac gives me heart palpitations I’m at my breaking point. Idk who I am anymore. And it’s so hard having to be a mother of two on top of not wanting to do anything bc my brain tells me everything I’m doing is inappropriate ☹️

Anonynmous19

Date posted: 18w

Pocd as parent

I was giving my child a bath. I picked her up out the tub because shes small. But the momentum of picking her up she swang a little toward my body and ocd said did i hip thrust kr do anything wrong. I did a compulsion saying NO repeatedly. And i put her back down and beforehand i didnt have any ill intent just to help her get out because shes a toddler. I had other intrusive thoughts but tbats not my intent i was just trying to be a good dad

Anonymous

Date posted: 17w

POCD and changing baby diaper - please help

Hi NOCD community, I was hoping to get some advice from fellow sufferers. In December we welcomed the first baby into the family, my beautiful niece. Since then, my POCD has been awful, which I know is probably very normal. Last week, in the middle of a very high stress day in my family, I was changing my niece and as usually happens, I got intrusive thoughts about awful things people do to babies when changing them. The thoughts were so harrowing to have as I was also changing her at the exact same time, and I felt my hands just quickly want to finish patting her dry before putting her nappy on, and for some reason, my heart dropped with that hand movement, because I was afraid that I had acted out the awful thoughts in my head, in a moment of mania because my morals, values and heart do not align with abuse of any kind, especially to children. My niece is my everything, and I know I would never want harm to come to her in any way, shape or form. I love her endlessly. I am having therapy, but have only had a couple of sessions. But, I cannot shake the 'what if'. I am tortured over trying to remember what it was I did that made my heart drop, but I can't, and its getting fuzzier and fuzzier the more I try to remember. Could anyone offer any advice on this please? Thank you.

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