Hi everyone, I have a question for anyone else with ROCD. I recently established, with the help of my therapist, that I need to stop talking about my intrusive thoughts to my husband so much, because I’m just ruminating out loud. Do you all even tell your partners when you’re struggling, or do you keep it to yourselves?
I will usually express when I’m feeling anxious or worrying, it’s also usually obvious to my partner when something isn’t right. But I don’t usually tell him the content or theme of my worry, because it would not be helpful for either of us in the moment. I find that confessing the content of the worry could potentially be damaging for both of us if it’s not done properly and It can also just be compulsive confessing if it’s done excessively.
I used to BUT confessing is usually seen as a compulsion. I usually feel it when I feel like I’ve done something wrong and have to tell my partner about my guilt. When you feel like you want to tell your partner something ask yourself this, “Why am I telling my partner this?” “Why do they need to know?” “Am I just wanting to feel better?” It’s VERY hard, but my partner knows how to deal with my OCD spats now and knows that I shouldn’t feel the need to confess constantly.
I used to but I stopped because I felt the things I was saying to him was causing him damage, and also it is a compulsion to talk about your intrusive thoughts. What my current bf does for me is if I start to talk/ruminate, he tells me he’s not going to engage with my thoughts. It can help break the cycle
I use too… I thought he was cheating like I put it on my mind he was. After I found out what ROCD was it really made it all make sense. I stopped letting those intrusive thoughts get to me but now it’s just voices I hear. Like people reading my mind and are out to get me for whatever reason 🤦♀️. I had to take a break on OCD therapy to get talk therapy for this issue.
I used to struggle with telling my partner every single intrusive thought I had. Unfortunately he also thought it would “help” with me telling him all of my thoughts. I made a start by telling him I’m not going to tell him every intrusive thought I have & I tried to get him to understand that him knowing them isn’t a good idea and is feeding into them. He now says to keep them to myself. Now, instead of going into detail about the intrusive thoughts potentially upsetting me AND him, I simply say “I am dealing with intrusive thoughts quite bad right now” and leave it at that, so he is aware. it does sort of feel like a weight lifted for me while also not completely seeking reassurance about if the theme of my intrusive thoughts are “bad”
I’ve explained to my boyfriend that confessing is bad and a compulsion. But I will say ocd is hell this week so that if I am irritable he knows why
Anyone have tips on Relationship OCD, and do you share the intrusive thoughts and tell your girlfriend you are dealing with this? Or keep it to yourself.
For those struggling with with ROCD do you let your partner in on what’s going through your mind? My boyfriend is my go to person to talk to about anything going on my life and really the only one who understands ocd but I feel it can be hurtful for him if I share intrusive thoughts about our relationship.
I'm currently struggling if I should tell her (she knows that I have mental health issues but nothing exactly). On the one hand I think she's really supportive and understanding, on the other hand I'm not sure if it would just be a compulsions (confessing - which I used to do a lot) and I don't want that she feels insecure.
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