I made a mistake that means I need to throw out 3/4 of a pizza. Super frustrated and I don't have an outlet. And I feel like I can't move forward with out resolving this issue by throwing it out. But I need reassurance to do that. I just feel stuck.
What did you “do” to the pizza?
I left it out while pick up pet dishes on the front porch. I have had a mouse problem in the past, multiple times, and honestly I'm not sure that I don't currently. I don't leave food out, out of severe anxiety that a mouse could get to it. My ocd has left my house in shambles, and my kitchen counter and sink have had dishes (rinsed, not dirty) on them for years. And amongst the dishes, around the counter and appliances, sign of mice that I was unable to address when they occurred, and am hoping I'm working towards addressing. In the meantime, the signs of mice have not been cleared in the first place. Sorry, there's just so much to all this.
@Steve 🧘♂️ And I have just been stuck, wasting time on this, and not figuring out something else for dinner.
I really just want to shout in frustration.
@Steve 🧘♂️ Have you looked into hiring help for clean up? Based on just what you said, you could possibly benefit from getting help to clean up and they could reduce mice issues too.
@Nica I have more issues than that, and I don't want others in my house. I need to do it myself, but there are a host of other priorities in front of it. Right now I just need to figure out what to do with my pizza, and what to do about dinner.
@Nica And frustrations like this have caused me to punch the wall before, which I don't want to do, but I'm just frustrated and I don't feel like I have an outlet.
@Despair I highly suggest looking into a therapist who specializes in OCD and they might expand into a specialist for hoarding, but that’s be up to a professional. Hoarding is now its own thing in the newest DSM.
@Nica I have that type of therapy already.
Sorry you had that experience! Hope it’s better now! I have also had a mouse eating food related frustration at my workplace that caused me to throw away a whole bag of goods which was scary and frustrating for me especially since one of the items was a gift from my mom. But I was able to eventually obtain a new one that I safely stowed away in my car now. Best of luck to your future self!
Earlier I posted about trying to get back to sitting on my sofa without a blanket covering it. And I did it, but now my day has been ruined. I left for two seconds and my cat decided to sit there, so now it's not clean anymore. This is because sometimes she's had number two stuck to her and no longer trust that she's clean. It took so much for me to just do that and sit without a blanket and now I'm just so done. I'm also scared to walk anywhere in my house. We sometimes get slugs in our conservatory and I don't walk in there anymore because there can be slug slime trails (it's carpet). The thing is, my mum regularly goes in there, my dad too. And then they proceed to walk around the rest of the house without changing shoes or anything. I'm just panicking because I was having a good day and now I feel like I'm isolated to my bedroom.
Today I kind of snapped and I do feel bad. At Chipotle, a worker wasn’t letting me finish my order and every 2 seconds she kept saying “that’s it?” “That’s it?” Like rushing me, and I yelled, “YES, THATS IT!” I do feel bad because maybe she was having a bad day but I was also frustrated. I do regret it because I need to stay calm in situations, especially because I understand how hard it is to work in fast food, I’ve done it before. I was overwhelmed and frustrated, she kept talking over me and I couldn’t even think about what I wanted next. I’m irritated with myself but I also feel my feelings aren’t wrong, I just handled it in a negative way. Now my OCD has latched on the situation and I can’t stop thinking about it. I feel like I’m an awful person and like I need some sort of punishment, as if having OCD isn’t enough punishment. I did try to call the restaurant to apologize but no one answered. I sent an email with an apology to customer support, I’m not sure if she’ll even get it. I’m having so many ruminating and self deprecating thoughts now. I’m not a terrible person but I feel like I am
I’ve posted something vulnerable here before and I’m trying to ride out the wave of reassurance where it’s getting at me and I’m scared of sitting still with nobody to talk to about this at the moment I genuinely think it would be easier if I wasn’t around. I view my friends as pure compared to me and I’m the most impurest. I feel like this would do a favour to stop being here I don’t know what to do, I really don’t know. I’m literally alone in this and I’m getting tired. How do you deal with stupid choices that you made as a child? I’m trying to be understanding of past mistakes but it’s gut wrenching to try and accept to say and admit you did it knowing you’ll spend the rest of your life with that guilt..is there another perspective to this..???
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