Anonymous
- Date posted
- 6y
lizzy123lizzy123
- Date posted
- 6y
Trigger warning!!! It can mean your terrified. I was sexually assaulted when i was younger and you can have a strong intense quick orgasm. Doesnt neccessarily mean anything. Your body reacting is sometimes out of your control.
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 6y
I'm going to cry, I am so sorry that happened to you, I am so so sorry you had to share this to try and make me feel better. I am so so sorry, I'm really grateful for you doing that and if there's anything I could do to repay you please tell me. FUCK THAT FREAK. I HATE THESE FUCKING FREAKS, I am so sorry that happened to you, I wish you all the joy in the world, because I know you deserve it. I was terrified, just so you know. Thank you so much, I'm sending you all my hugs and all my support and if you ever need me, don't be afraid to let me know.
jaffjaff
- Date posted
- 6y
It's a checking compulsion, ultimately it will backfire tho. As a thought can be easily manipulated by the ocd part of your brain. The best approach that I've found is to not let the theme of your ocd be the focus of your energy, but instead let your mind learn to cope with the anxiety on it's own. Each time you get triggered your brain and body will become better at dealing with it and eventually dismissing the thoughts willbecome automatic.
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 6y
But I'm scared because I'm not diagnosed and I managed to have an orgasm more than once testing myself via masturbation. I don't know what it means, I don't know if it's my fault and I'm so scared it's not OCD. I don't know whether I should blame myself for these compulsions but I feel like such a disgusting piece of shit and I want this gone so badly. I want this erased and never to be remembered again.
andrewt_andrewt_
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 6y
Lmaooo I got you ?❤️??
jaffjaff
- Date posted
- 6y
It's part of a cycle of maladaptive coping, because we have a disorder that revolves around fear and worry with no resolution.
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 6y
Well when you have a worry about being a freak after orgasming to freaky stuff and willingly thinking about it to check if you get aroused, then of course the "irrational fear" becomes rational. It's hard.
jaffjaff
- Date posted
- 6y
You make yourself masturbate to the thoughts as a compulsion to check, is what I mean. You wouldn't normally do that, which means you can control your mind. One of the things about ocd is that depression makes its symptoms worse how we feel about ourselves is distorted when we are depressed. Recognize and separate yourself from the disorder, and yes you will get better at dealing with this.
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 6y
I have masturbated to the thoughts only when my OCD started and after I orgasmed more than once I was so traumatized that I never did it again. I never want to do it again. There was one time where I was in the shower and an intrusive thought persisted really hard as I was masturbating and I tried masturbating to it for like 5 seconds then immediately stopped when I realized that I was actually going flacid and becoming completely unaroused. That was the only time I ever did something similar after those traumatizing compulsions backfired on me. I felt like shit even then. But it showed me that the arousal part is extremely inconsistent and basically reassured me that something non-paraphillic is affecting me. I will never ever test myself again. EVER. It makes me feel like an absolute monster so I avoid it like the plague nowadays. I'm just mad that I'm giving into the checking for arousal via willingly thinking gross things compulsion. I hate these things, but I CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT CERTAINTY AND I WANT TO UNDERSTAND WHY THE HELL IT CAUSES GROINAL RESPONSES WHEN IT SHOULDN'T. I just want to be free from all of this.
lizzy123lizzy123
- Date posted
- 6y
Your welcome! I just want you to know that terror can cause orgasms. It sounds unbelievable but its true.
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 6y
I'm so sorry you had to experience something so disgusting and terrifying. I promise I won't disappoint you.
IdkIdk
- Date posted
- 6y
Yes but whenever I don’t do it, I feel like I’m Just denying my sexuality.
andrewt_andrewt_
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 6y
This is definitely a compulsion. The groinal response is usually going to happen when you check because they’re caused by anxiety and the fact that you don’t want them to happen causes them. That’s why they shouldn’t be used as an indication of anything !
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 6y
Thanks andreww. You're always busting through to save my ass.
jaffjaff
- Date posted
- 6y
Ok so just remember that emotions are not facts. We have three minds the emotional the logical and the wise. If your in one more than the other things happen, such as if you are in your emotional mind to much you will use feelings more than facts causing you to make bad decisions or overreact. Anxiety is fear overrun, the good news is that you can train your brain to have better control of these thoughts. Your in control even if you feel a certain way you fear being attracted to a child, but that answers the question in its self. It's not a rationale or logical conclusion, which means its ocd.
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 6y
But nobody has any idea how I could orgasm from testing myself and I have no idea and I don't know what it means... I want a concrete answer as to how the hell this happened and nobody is stepping up instead sending me OCD articles about arousal that I've already seen. I'm so terrified that I'm like a disgusting severe case for OCD or that it's not OCD and I'm so scared that I'm never gonna get better because these checking/testing compulsions will haunt me for life. I am living in hell.
jaffjaff
- Date posted
- 6y
Knowing that dont focus on the theme focus on training yourself to overcome ocds distorted thinking.
jaffjaff
- Date posted
- 6y
You orgasm is derived from emotions aka feelings, and the physical stimulation of your body. Take away the physical in this situation and you will not have an orgasm. A guy can have a blank mind and still masturbate to orgasm, basically it's not going to give you any certainty and will only make you depressed in the long run.
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 6y
But I orgasmed extremely quickly....like in SECONDS. What does that mean???? I've read that quick orgasms happen because of feelings of guilt stress and anxiety about orgasming and I've read studies that suggest that men who have anxiety cant supress their arousal when trying to and in fact get even more aroused just by anxiously trying to suppress it. I need an answer because I feel like such a freak and I want to erase it from ever happening. I just want to be myself again.
jaffjaff
- Date posted
- 6y
If you have to force yourself focus on it, you control your mind
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 6y
I don't know what I'm forcing. I want to control my mind. I have intrusive thoughts, doubts and fears about more than just pedophilia. I want my old life back......I feel so gross...I feel so defeated. You think I'll ever get better?
jaffjaff
- Date posted
- 6y
Have you been to the intrusivethoughts.org they have alot of helpful information and advice.
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 6y
I have and even though they said that an unwanted orgasm can happen they didn't specify any details.
Related posts
flyinggorilla
- Date posted
- 16w
Need Clarity
I recently had a intrusive thought and felt the need to go over it to make sure I didn’t feel anything sexual. Part of the reviewing included creating a scenario similar to the intrusive thought to see if anything was felt. Thankfully no evidence of any feelings. However I can’t seem to find anything on the internet about creating scenarios when checking a previous intrusive thought. Is this common and what is it called has anyone experienced this. I feel very alone. Any feedback would be helpful
Anonymous
- Date posted
- 11d
Question about groinal response
How strong does the groinal response feel for any of you? I ask this because I genuinely cannot tell the difference between what is a groinal response and what is true arousal. A lot of the times the groinal response feels even stronger than true arousal. On top of that, the more taboo or disturbing/graphic the thought (particularly with POCD), the stronger the response/arousal is. Is that normal? I'd like to hear any of your experiences on the topic.
anon1039
- Date posted
- 8d
Thought popped up in a bad context, now I'm worried
I (22M) had been...pleasuring myself, and just as I was finishing, I felt like I needed to test myself mentally and a thought popped up (again, solely mentally) and it felt like I enjoyed it for a split second while I was "finishing". I tried to redirect my focus in the moment, and it didn't really work. After, I felt really off-put and worried about what it could mean. I have been extremely fearful of ending up being "that" way. I know false attraction etc. could have played a role, but I've never been officially diagnosed. There had been times I tested myself in my head before (not like in a context like this), and I felt like I had spikes of attraction before feeling offput by it, and I've been really, really worried if I had been in denial. The thoughts that I tested myself with included non-problematic things that I found attractive, so I'm not sure if that affected my reactions all those times, but regardless I had been worried. I also tested myself in my head after waking up almost every day, and it felt like I failed when I did. I tried to not assign meaning to it, and it helped with avoiding spiralling, but again, I don't know if I'm in denial or not. I understand if this is probably, but I was wondering if I could get any insight.
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