I’ve been recovering from my recent TOCD flare up. For a week, I did not let my intrusive thoughts win or let me panic. Recently, my girlfriend has been super busy, distant, and stressed. For some reason, ever since she’s been like that, I have been falling into the darkness of TOCD. Not like I am blaming her at all. I was just wondering if the two were connected.
Hello. In my experience it absolutely can, for sure. When I had a girlfriend I was constantly afraid of losing her, and I noticed looking back that it made my OCD particularly loud at the time 😞. This is the cruelty of the disorder, it always seems to go after what means the most to you. And it flares up during times of uncertainty, stress, change etc. You’ll get through the flare up, continue to take it easy and look after yourself (far easier said than done, I know).
hey, it's really impressive that you've been managing your TOCD and not letting those intrusive thoughts take over. it sounds super tough, especially with feeling the distance from your girlfriend lately. it's totally normal to feel more vulnerable when we're feeling disconnected from our support system. 💔 by the way, have you heard about this new AI-powered OCD therapy tool called 'unstuck?' when i was dealing with something similar, this free AI OCD therapy tool (unstuckmyocd.com/try) that my NOCD therapist recommended really made a difference for me. i think it'll be especially helpful for you because it can provide that bit of extra support when you're feeling the impact of your girlfriend being busy and stressed. it's like having an OCD therapist in your pocket, offering personalized step-by-step support to navigate through tough times. i hate when people promote stuff, but i really think it can help you because it's changed my life. lmk if you have Qs or just want to talk more! <3
I‘ve had relationship OCD before, but mostly just in very short episodes. However it has been very present in the past weeks and it’s been very hard to deal with since my boyfriend is kind of my safe space and helps me calm down, but now I feel like OCD is pushing me away even from him
I believe I’ve always had intrusive/OCD thoughts. When I was younger I always repeated phrases because my brain went “if you don’t do this your whole family will die” but it wasn’t anything too bad. However, when I was 15 I entered my first relationship. I had divorced parents and didn’t know what love was - so it ended up being abusive and I did not know. He forced me to disclose all the people I found attractive as well as all the “unpure” thoughts I had. He deemed fantasizing cheating - which I respected - but also caused for a lot of intrusive thoughts to make me freak out. He also gaslit me and accused me of cheating for the lightest things (gave my cousin a side-hug) and prohibited me from getting male friends because he thought I’d cheat (I’ve never been unfaithful or even flirted w another man. I’ve always had strong morals about it) I believe this trauma is what made my ocd what it is now, since I’m used to being accused for stuff I didn’t understand or have control over. I believe that understanding OCDs roots allows me to heal because it reminds me that I could exist without this thoughts and still had a good moral compass.
I recently revived my award for conquering my OCD. I was feeling great, having improved significantly. Previously my OCD was mostly focused on constant debilitating fears that something bad would happen to my loved ones. Now I can’t even remember the last time I had a thought like that which is great. I am preparing to move across the country to live with my boyfriend and now i’m experiencing ROCD which i’ve never had before. It’s been days of this now and am afraid I won’t be able to get it under control. It is also making me so sad because I have never had thoughts like these regarding my relationship before. Any suggestions on how to tackle this before it worsens? I am trying to use the same strategies I learned in therapy that I used for my other themes, however i’m struggling.
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