Soocd- can someone explain if this is normal ?

@Ifiknewthen Keep exposing myself?

@Yougotthroughthis! Yeah even though its more than likely youre just dealing with sexual orientation ocd, they still want you to do exposure and response prevention. Which means exposing yourself to the content that makes you anxious. If a person has contamination ocd then they slowly exposure them to dirt, germs, etc until it doesnt bother them anymore. And stop any behaviors to neutralize the anxiety caused by the exposure to the dirt, germs, etc. With soocd they will expose you to gay/lesbian content over long period of time and stop the compulsions to neutralize the anxiety. Its called habituation in psychology. Eventually you wont have any anxiety when thinking about sex with other women or when seeing lesbian content. Unfortunately, you cant just think or rationalize your way out of soocd or any other form of ocd. My ocd conselor always tells me that ERP is an "action-based" treatment. You cant just think your way into feeling better. You have to "act your way into thinking." So its really important to get into treatment with an ocd therapist. If you cant afford one with NOCD then try someone thats covered by your insurance plan.

@Yougotthroughthis! I know its really hard to understand this right now. Your anxiety is high and you just want it to go away today. Ocd and other anxiety disorders are tough to deal with. The good news is these treatments are not just theories. They are proven to work. People with severe ocd have been cured with long term treatment. But you have to have the nerve and perservearance to follow a treatment plan to get better.

@Ifiknewthen Thank you for explaining this!

@Ifiknewthen However I’m not young but I’m late teens and I don’t want to start treatment right this moment

@Yougotthroughthis! A lot of this is probably caused by internet crap. Just chill out and dont let the internet crap get to you.

@ninkaninga Never in real life, or like movies only in the context of p*rn

@Yougotthroughthis! Yea, then i get it. I think its pretty normal like we can be aroused by everything sexual. I also have never been aroused in real life, only in p*rn.

@ninkaninga @ninkaninga Honestly, I came to the realisation that it’s just reacting to it because it is sexual, and so what if I like it, I don’t want to act on it and if I DID I wouldn’t have this ocd because I would then know I want to be with a women. I also think when I’m in the moment with the guy I want, I will be aroused, a lot of straight p*rn is so aggressive, why would I watch it you know.

@Yougotthroughthis! Yes i totally get you😇 it is true that we have a reaction to sexual content. There is nothing wrong if u like it or not. I also did it on lesbian porn few times and i dont think i was attracted to those girls. Yea, it makes sense that if u would like to do it with a women you probably wouldnt have so-ocd even though my mind sometimes tells me that i want it and that i want to act on it😕 i dont know if this is also your case? Like now as u wrote it down i feel like i want it. Im also a virgin, i never dated a guy in my life and im scared that i wouldnt like it🙁

@ninkaninga You have crushes on guys right? Im late teen, and pretty sure I’ve been inlove but due to circumstances we never did anything although, whenever I was with him if it was right place and time we would have. I know I’m on here, and shouldn’t be asking for reassurance. However in a bad patch of it and the panic makes me feel a bit sick. Again just say to yourself so what? Literally, like I get turned on by it so what? ay a

@Yougotthroughthis! Im 20 and ive got this hocd since i was 14 and before i liked some guys but not much and im scared that it was all fake because ive never really been boy crazy. Like what does it mean being boy crazy? Ive never really had male celebrity crushes. But i loved watching romantic movies and read romance and then imagining myself with a boy one day in the future. But ive never done anything with a guy. Not even a kiss😕 i want to kiss one when i was 13, but we didnt and it made me so sad. So im scared that i dont even know what having a crush feels like or being attracted.

@ninkaninga I’m no therapist but honestly I would say your 20, go out and explore, dating apps etc, go out with guys, I think in your case that you don’t know what to even compare it too, which is fine! Some girls don’t feel attraction for guys until later on in life, everyone is different!

@Yougotthroughthis! Yea, but im so scared that im just gay and i dont want to be😔 my life feels like a lie. I feel broken. I even question if im asexual or aromantic but i dont think I’m.

@Yougotthroughthis! Boy crazy as in for me from a young age I was obsessed with this boy, and I have had multiple crushes on boys, kissed a few, however don’t compare this to you, everyone again is different!

@ninkaninga Do you get aroused by men?

@Yougotthroughthis! I mean i also liked some of my classmates. I even kissed one on his lips when i was 7 in front of his girlfriend haha or i do remember me writing into diary that “Im into xyz”. I liked a guy when i was 13 and i was so upset and sad that he was dating another girl and i was jealous that he gives other girls attention. I thought i was in love with him back then because i felt broken.

@Yougotthroughthis! I dont know if in reality i do, but i do get aroused when i think about it. When i have fantasies. I dont think i was like aroused when i just saw a guy. But sometimes when my friend touched me i felt like it made me kinda aroused. I feel like im just faking my straight self and i now feel like “i dont deserve be straight” because of this. That i dont have enough evidence of me being straight. And it just makes me sad now.

@ninkaninga I think yours is fuelled by the fact you haven’t had many recent experiences with guys. I think next steps would look at going on a date with a guy but accepting the uncertainty, you may like it you may not. I have accepted the fact I get aroused by watching same sex, I cannot change that fact but what I can do is know my feelings towards boys are true, when I go through phases of this, sometimes the thought of men and even the thought of watching same sex becomes very unappealing, you may feel so panicked that you feel asexual

@Yougotthroughthis! Yea but idk why but im so scared of relationships and sometimes i like the idea o being with a boy and sometimes idk why it makes me anxious and sometimes i feel like repulsed which bothers me so much because when im doing good i really like to fantasize about it😔😔 if i wouldnt like the date i believe that i would feel like this must mean im gay

@ninkaninga I understand you, there are many guys out there too, first one may not always be right and lead to more stress. I believe though it’s the only way to grow

@Yougotthroughthis! Your timing will come, many girls are late bloomers in the boy life, I know many.

@Yougotthroughthis! I would rather be a late bloomer in the boy life rather than late bloomer lesbian

@ninkaninga Have you considered ERP therapy

@Yougotthroughthis! Yes, but i wasnt even diagnosed with ocd :(

@ninkaninga What did they say I was then

@Yougotthroughthis! it*

@Yougotthroughthis! I mean i wasnt diagnosed because i have never been to a professional

@ninkaninga ahhh, if you have Spotify, there are some really good podcasts, maybe help you find some clarity

@Yougotthroughthis! I mean so many people have told me that i have OCD :(