Anonymous
- Date posted
- 1y
Arousal by thoughts!!
Does anyone with HOCD ever get aroused by thoughts (aka testing the thoughts) when performing a sexual act and how did you work around that. It’s been running my life for a while!
TexasOCD41TexasOCD41
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 1y
So you are probably crossing some wires by doing this. First all, checking (testing thoughts) is a compulsion and compulsions feed OCD so you need to stop doing that. Secondly- you were already performing a sex act so how can you be certain that your thoughts caused arousal? you cant for sure but you brought something distressing to ming during an erotic setting so you cannot trust what ever feelings you think you had. 3rd- anxiety can be expressed in what is called a groinal response that feels like arousal but actually its anxiety so even IF you think you felt aroused... it was likely anxiety mimicking an aroused response. Lets not be mixing pleasure and business in the future and keep those wires apart.
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 1y
@TexasOCD41 This is super helpful thank you! Really appreciate this. What about when you’re performing an act and it just pops up without your control do you just let the thought be there even if you think it’s causing arousal? This is like a testing scenario.
TexasOCD41TexasOCD41
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 1y
@Anonymous - thoughts can't be controled. That is what we have to accept in OCD. I had a brief bout with POCD and I had POCD thoughts running thru my head while I was making love with my husband... i tried REALLY hard to push them aside but they remained and I remained aroused and ... well, the typical things that happen at the end of making love happened. it distressed me greatly at the time because I thought " did I... finish, thinking about a child?" and later once I got out of POCD I realized.. nope, it was an intrusive thought that just happened to be bugging me BECUASE I was trying to not think about it, and I finished because I was making love to my husband. so yes.. you let thoughts be thoughts and let them pass and you stay involved in what you are doing.
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 1y
@TexasOCD41 Cannot thank you enough for your insight!
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 1y
@TexasOCD41 Hey are you free to connect on the side?
TexasOCD41TexasOCD41
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 1y
@Anonymous - What do you mean?
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 1y
@TexasOCD41 Am I able to message you directly sorry didn’t specify that in my original message
TexasOCD41TexasOCD41
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 1y
@Anonymous Sure. Idk how it works but give it a try
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 1y
@TexasOCD41 I know I probably already asked this, but. I was testing myself out with the thought, once performing a sexual act and was getting aroused, which has caused me great distress and commit a lot of compulsions. Have you ever encountered something like this and if so, how are you able to get over this?
TexasOCD41TexasOCD41
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 1y
@Anonymous - Well i have never tested myself but I have had POCD thoughts in my head during sex as I think I mentioned and it was distressing but I just had to accept that I was experiencing OCD and my arousal was from the sex with my husband, not the POCD image I kept seeing in my head. I would not test OCD. That is a compulsion and will only feed it and make it stronger. so long story short, I got over it by not compulsing, not testing, and accepting that I have OCD and that it would pass if I let it. and it did.
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 1y
@TexasOCD41 I’ve tested myself and have gotten around which has messed me up for months.
TexasOCD41TexasOCD41
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 1y
@Anonymous Stop testing and stop trying to figure out why you got aroused. You were doing a sex act you were probably already aroused and had a wire crossed
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 1y
@TexasOCD41 Appreciate it!
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 1y
@TexasOCD41 It was just hard cause I purposely thought of it and it felt like I was forcing myself to get aroused. But now it put me in a place of is this OCD or denial?!
TexasOCD41TexasOCD41
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 1y
@Anonymous Hallmark sign of ocd is asking “ is this ocd”
TexasOCD41TexasOCD41
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 1y
@Anonymous You purposely thought of it because you were doing a compulsion , not because you actually wanted to be aroused. Do you want to do it again? If no then that points even more to OCD
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 1y
@TexasOCD41 The only reason I would want to do it again is to make sure I don’t get aroused not because I liked it
TexasOCD41TexasOCD41
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 1y
@Anonymous - Exactally, you are checking- that is a a compulsion which is what makes OCD stronger. the mind body connection is so strong, you can create experiences simply by looking for them, even if they are not a real reaction. You pretty much set yourself up for failure by checking. You need to really force yourself to accept it wasn't real, it was OCD,
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 1y
@TexasOCD41 Thank you so much for this advice. This really helps. Is there a way I can connect with you on social media or something else. If not no worries. Your help has been huge
TexasOCD41TexasOCD41
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 1y
@Anonymous - I would prefer to keep my therapy community separate from my personal life. I appreciate the request tho. I hope you are able to improve. Happy to help
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 1y
@TexasOCD41 Totally understand and appreciate all of your help! Really thank you so much.
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 1y
@Anonymous TMI but how does one stop compulsively masturbate whenever I feel triggered or testing myself. I know it sounds weird but I don’t want to stop it completely out of my life forever
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- Date posted
- 15w
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- Date posted
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geodrimilis
- Date posted
- 14w
About hocd
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