Fear of getting dumped because of OCD
How have you dealt with this? OCD definitely has affected my relationship but he’s been and stayed with me for over a year and a breakup hasn’t happened. Yet in my mind I’m not worthy of a relationship because of my mental health. Help?
I have dealt with this my whole life. I started by realizing that I was just as worthy as anyone else. Name good qualities you have and then name the things that you’d like to work on. Everyone has flaws and that is normal, if everyone was perfect you’d get bored because you’re never changing. Another thing that is very helpful is confronting the fear, it can be very scary but the more you listen to the fear the bigger it grows. Our emotions love themselves and so you need to starve the negative ones out. Ask yourself why you feel that way and why it’s so scary. Then start to do the opposite, tell yourself you are worthy and that if you want a relationship you absolutely deserve it. Be okay with someone missing out on the person that you are because your true love is yourself and you need to be content who are and love that person. Hope this helps, you got this no matter what!
Oh I have felt that way in past relationships too. It's like I'm waiting for the shoe to drop and definitely makes my ocd and anxiety worse.
@Anonymous Any tips on getting through it?
I just “came out” to my boyfriend and I’m feeling the same way you are. He has been amazing so far, but my brain is convincing me that my themes are too terrible and the possible mistakes I’ve made are too awful for him to stay. He keeps reassuring me, but I don’t know if I’ll ever be 100% convinced. Obviously we know that reassurance doesn’t help. But, that’s also just what loved ones do. I’m so sorry we’re going through this ❤️😫
My boyfriend freaked out when he found out I had OCD. He never looked at me the same way again. He broke up with me a few days after - we had been dating for 2 years. Has this happened to anyone? How did you cope? It’s been a few years since this happened and I still feel so embarrassed to this day.
How did you tell your partner about your ocd? I’ve never been in a relationship but I am scared to death just thinking about having to tell a future boyfriend about my ocd. I feel weird and alone and like no one will ever want to be with me. Especially if they find out about my mental illness. I’m 23 now and feel like I will be alone forever.
I have been with my SO going in 13 years now. We met in college and have been together ever since. We got married in 2021 and welcomed a baby girl in the world last year. I had a severe mental breakdown in 2013 that landed me in the hospital because I was contemplating suicide. That breakdown nearly destroyed our relationship. I had severe intrusive thoughts and felt the need to tell him all of them. I felt like if I didn’t tell him, I was lying. I destroyed his self esteem, telling him all of the mean thoughts I had about him. I would feel the need to tell him anytime I saw an attractive guy in public, I questioned our relationship and told him I wasn’t sure if I loved him anymore. It was bad and very dark. Fast forward to now and I feel like I’m letting him down in different ways. I don’t feel the need to tell him every thought I have now but since having my daughter my OCD and depression seem to be getting worse. I just feel like I’m no longer happy and my daughter should’ve had a mom that wasn’t damaged like me. Didn’t have the abusive childhood like me. Wasn’t broken like me. I feel so much guilt. It’s putting such a strain on our relationship and I feel like my husband deserves someone better. Someone whose happier.
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