What if I have munchausen ? I’m scared

So I have posted here before about this topic. I feel so ashamed so angry but I feel it is my ocd … so from time to time me and my psychologist will talk about different diagnoses ( like if it’s almost time to end our session) because psychologist and like the dsm manual and all these diagnoses are so fascinating to learn about but I feel like I want a “new diagnosis “ and I don’t understand why I feel like I get a high off of it and excited that there’s something “wrong” with me…the last time I posted this someone said maybe it’s because you feel seen and heard and maybe that’s the case but now I just feel like my brain wants me to stack up the diagnoses like tokens … when having this thought I’m very careful of telling it to anyone or even asking hey could I have “so and so diagnosis “ because I don’t want to be seen as an attention seeker because I am not I don’t know were the want or “need” for a diagnosis comes from I just feel it goes beyond so much more than being seen or heard … but what if someone knew my true thoughts would they think I’m attention seeking from now on and not give me any diagnosis or even listen now to what I have to say because they already think I’m doing it for attention or acting that way for attention and even if it is a genuine diagnosis what if I made up enough symptoms I have a diagnosis of something but it’s actually “fake” I don’t know why I’m doing this please help and please don’t stop believing me

m4gg0t_m34t777

Date posted: 47w

If you have to ask yourself 'am I faking?? What if Im doing this for attention?', your 100% not. People who do fake, actively kno they're faking and don't ask themself "am I faking?' because they just know they are. You are not faking and you are not doing this for attention. Someone who wants attention wouldn't go through all the symptoms your going through and continue to do it if it's upsetting them. You cannot control it and its okay. You are not faking for attention. Just know, the diagnosis isn't the thing that gives you the disorder, its your brain. The diagnosis is just on paper, ur brain has it and the diagnosis doesn't make you have it. You've always had it

Little_Hooves4

Date posted: 16w

What If your symptoms aren't here and sometimes your feelings aren't either, but at times perfectionism is still there and it feels sad to say that OCD is gone ? Even though i know its not and just changed themed. It seems like I miss my thoughts and compulsions, my need for control over things, and even though I know it's meta causing this I just really want to class it as a symptom

Blueberrycows

Date posted: 16w

@Little_Hooves4 Huh sorry im confused? Are you asking your own question? Or replying to my post and I’m just not understanding..: if you’re asking your own question. It might be easier if you make a post with your question so you might be able to receive more help

Little_Hooves4

Date posted: 16w

@Blueberrycows Oh sorry I think I wrote it a bit wrong 😅 I was trying to say how sometimes it feels like you want symptoms when it's really just meta. Sorry about that

Blueberrycows

Date posted: 16w

@Little_Hooves4 No worries and I can understand that

miaahoo

Date posted: 47w

I understand how this feels so much.

Blueberrycows

Date posted: 47w

@miaahoo Like even tho this is an ocd app what if I have more diagnosis’s then ocd and what if I “want” more

miralien

Date posted: 47w

Incredibly relatable.

maxine.anast...

Date posted: 24w

recent diagnosis

i just got diagnosed with ptsd on top of my ocd but my ocd is trying to convince me that i am lying to myself & my psychiatrist & that i am an “attention-seeker”. i feel so embarrassed by these thoughts that its eating me up. my ocd makes me feel so invalidated from what i went thru that led to me being diagnosed with ptsd… does anyone else experience this?

thesunwillco...

Date posted: 19w

diagnosis

i’m terrified to get a diagnosis. What if it’s not actually OCD??? I made a list of reasons why i think so and then i think what if im lying and i actually don’t do this stuff and am just dramatic and i just want to have OCD so then my thoughts are justified?? I have struggled in the past year with Pocd & Rocd and then also some bits of thinking im constantly in danger or being watched? I’m scared.

blehh

Date posted: 13w

Advice?

I’m trying so hard to feel normal again but i cant i keep feeling like im being dramatic and that my symptoms aren’t real and im tricking everyone, even on here i feel like im tricking you all into believing i have OCD when i don’t. Plus all these other types thoughts im having all meshing together its so overwhelming and i dont know what to do. My therapist appointment isnt until next week and idek what shes gonna tell me or if she’ll even think i have OCD. i keep thinking about my other posts on here and wondering if i even meant what i said in them. this is the worst ive ever felt i think i might even be going through depersonalization or derealization but im not even sure about that i dont even know anything about what im really going through cause ive never been given any kind of formal diagnosis its only ever been depression and social anxiety but ive always had a feeling it was more but i keep doubting myself. maybe if anyone wants to look at some of my other posts and tell me what u think in general? or would that be reassurance seeking? i feel like most of my posts might be but im not sure.. IM NOT SURE ABOUT ANYTHING! this is so annoying

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What if I have munchausen ? I’m scared

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