Dating paranoia

I've just started dating this really great girl. She doesn't know about my ocd which is fine but I've noticed that a lot of my intrusive thoughts and worries about not following routines now revolve around losing her or her believing I'm a bad person. I just don't want this relationship to make me so paranoid. I also know have this where if I see a girl on my Instagram or on the Internet, I'll feel an overwhelming urge to clean myself and the device I viewed it on. This is part of a moral reaction and I also worry I'm not being loyal. I feel I should try and not follow through with these compulsions but as they now revolve around keeping my girlfriend I'm not sure. Any advice?

Username: KellymerellieKellymerellie

Date posted: 10w ago

As a female myself, I am so proud that you feel so loyal to your girlfriend. OCD took what was most important to you and is giving you a run for your money. Don't let it win. I know it's easier said then done, because I am going through my own OCD struggles but you can do it. Some advice: Talk to your girlfriend: let her know what is bothering you. Communication is key whether a person has OCD or not. You are a great person who has a great set of values. I can tell just from your post. You are loyal and genuine. That's all most girls want. Don't given in to compulsions: I know it's hard not too, but you are clean and so is your mind. Girls are everywhere and you can't clean everything whenever you see a girl. You have to face it. You can look at a girl and you can talk to her and be loyal. You have to be strong. Please don't clean your phone or not feel loyal because you read my reply. DON'T LET THE THOUGHTS WIN! I wish you the you and your girlfriend the best ☺

Username: Rocd-SOSRocd-SOS

Date posted: 10w ago

I can relate! Mine revolve around losing my husband, in so many ways What techniques have helped you in the past? Have you used any of the techniques for this, or does this theme suddenly feel like “the exception” ? 🙃

Username: AnonymousAnonymous

Date posted: 10w ago

I relate to this too!! My thoughts revolve around being a bad person and why should my boyfriend be with me if I’m such a horrible person. My bf does not have OCD or really any mental health issues but has been very understanding and accepting when I try to explain it to him. I would definitely reccomend telling her about your struggles. Be careful not to go too far where it becomes a compulsion to tell her though, because I have been there too. You’ve got this!!!!!

Username: joshuastonejoshuastone

Date posted: 10w ago

I hear you, and I'm so sorry you're feeling this way. It sounds like you're navigating a lot right now, and I can understand how these thoughts and compulsions might feel overwhelming. It's wonderful that you've found someone special, and it's completely normal to have worries about a new relationship, especially when OCD is involved. It seems like your OCD is trying to latch onto what you value most, which is quite common. Your desire to not follow through with these compulsions is a positive step toward managing your OCD. Have you considered gently challenging these thoughts by sitting with the discomfort and uncertainty they bring? It might help to remind yourself that having a thought doesn't make it true or mean you'll act on it. Could it be helpful to talk to a therapist who specializes in OCD about these feelings? They can provide guidance on how to navigate these thoughts and help you develop strategies to manage them. Remember, you are strong and capable of facing this. You can get through this, and your relationship can thrive alongside your journey to manage OCD.

Username: sams07

Date posted: 5y ago

Advice please! I have OCD, and it’s wormed it’s way to my relationship. It particularly revolves around social media, trust and the security of being together “forever”. I whole heartedly trust my partner. However, we all know that OCD causes doubt in the most rational things. Lately, if I get an irrational thought, I ask my partner if it’s true or not true, I get the affirmation I need, and then I feel intense guilt. The cycle begins again because I feel insecure for asking such questions, How do I work through these nagging thoughts and not bring my boyfriend into it? I get super impulsive and just ask him to reassure me. When I don’t ask him and challenge the thought, I’m really moody with him. I’ve had OCD my entire life and have “cured” other obsessions/rituals but for some reason, this one is tough, since another person is involved. Any advice?!

Relationship OCD

Username: Anonymousx

Date posted: 1y ago

Do I give OCD the power to end my relationship?

Hello guys, Im new here and seeking for advice. Im in a relationship with an amazing guy. I love him so much and that’s why my ocd and anxiety are latching onto my connection with him. He was staying over at my place and 2 events happened (something to do with his disease and he had an allergic reaction to food) that caused my stress and anxiety levels to be higher than normal. Followed by a night of bad sleep made things worse. I became very alert and was easily triggered. Something occurred that I completely miscalculated and we talked about it but my anxiety was through the roof at this point. I got these disturbing images of me hurting him in my head. I have had intrusive thoughts in the past but it didn’t affect me this much. Because of the lack of sleep and my high anxiety level made me so afraid of myself that I made the decision to sent him home. I have cried so much since that happened. I feel so bad for having that thought. I love him so much. Our communication is very healthy so I’ve told him about this the day after (why I sent him home). I couldnt do it in the moment because i didnt want to make the situation worse. We werent in a fight when i sent him home but both emotional and hugging each other. I have the feeling that my anxiety and ocd have won the battle by sending him home (avoidance). But i care so much for him that I didn’t want him to be at risk (thats what my mind tells me, i know its showing me disturbing images the opposite of what i want). Im in the early stage of having this type of OCD but I don’t want to lose him. But for me the only way to get this relationship to work is to get rid of this. Can anyone relate? Like, having intrusive thoughts about your partner? I know its latching on to the things you love the most and I hate it so much. Thanks in advance :)

Username: 12sopapia

Date posted: 47w ago

Relationship ocd

In my past relationship that lasted for years, I so many obsessive thoughts and intrusive thoughts that I listened to like “you don’t really love him. You’re just pretending”. I told him when I would have these thoughts and I could tell that this was not helping our relationship when I would tell him, but the compulsions felt better when I did it. We eventually broke up, and even though he swore it was not because of my ocd, I can’t help but think that I scared him. Flash forward two years and I’ve met this other man. I am worried that my intrusive thoughts about relationship worries will get the best of me and I will end things before they even get good. I think I am more prepared for this time but I’m still worried. I wish I could just stay in the moment and not catastrophic everything.

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Dating paranoia

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