Scared of myself

Sometimes im really scared of myself. I get these urges to hurt myself and theyre so intense and i cant Stop Them. For example, when im shaving, then i get the urge to Cut myself and I feel so anxious cause im Just so scared of doing it. Or when im cooking or straightning my Hair, i wanna burn myself. I Know that Sounds confusing but sometimes when i wanna Hurt myself then i already kinda feel the pain without even doing it. And i Know all of this has something to do with my ocd because i dont actually wanna Hurt myself.

djflorio

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 44w

What you're describing as an "urge to hurt yourself" could very well just be your physical reaction to intrusive thoughts about hurting yourself. It's the same idea as being near a high ledge, and paradoxically feeling an "urge" to jump, or to push a loved one, even though you definitely don't want to. The thought of "I could easily hurt myself right now," or "I want to hurt myself" may pop up out if nowhere, and if that thought is in any way alarming to you, you will feel a little anxious. That feeling of anxiety could be mistaken for a desire to perform an action (in this case, harming yourself). In any case, the way to get past this is by not resisting these thoughts and feelings. Logically that might sound scary, because right now you likely subconsciously believe that you are preventing yourself from harming yourself through force of will. Like keeping tabs on these "urges" or thoughts is what is keeping you safe. But actually by paying so much attention and worrying about these urges and thoughts, you're increasing their perceived importance, causing them to happen more often and feel scarier. My suggestion is that while you're shaving, if this urge that you feel comes up, just take notice of what you feel in your body. You'll likely feel some typical markers of anxiety, such as butterflies in the stomach, a tense or uncomfortable feeling in the chest, etc. The point is to be curious about it rather than worried about it. Just think, "I'm aware of the feeling of (insert something you notice here)" and then bring your attention back to your shaving. Thoughts will beg you to latch into the story of "I want to hurt myself," and that's ok. That's expected. Just do your best to acknowledge them and bring your attention back to the present, and keep shaving. Hope this helps and makes some sense.

HannahsJourney

Date posted: 44w

@djflorio First of all, thank u so so much for your response! Thanks for taking the time to write it and for sharing these tips! I will try to change my way of thinking and let you know if it worked. Tysm again 💓

Tanza_night67

Date posted: 25w

Intrusive thoughts of Hurting others

I have this issue where I can vividly imagine hurting others or animals or say things OUTLOUD that may be disruptive or disrespectful becauss I am overstimulated by soemthing someone is doing or saying. So, Over stimulation with people and animals and things they do can be a big part of it, Sometimes I will see soemthing that bothers me about someone and I just want to either fix it or hit them because they make me so overstimulated I just want to hit the problem. I never act on these things obviously but SOMETIMES it leaks out and I hit my hands together to calm the urges. I really don’t like imagining hurting others but when I get mad I obsess over what I would or could do to them or might or would’ve in a situation in the past, had it planned out differently. I keep thinking about it and thinking about it and then get upset with myself because I know it’s wrong to be thinking about hurting others and it worries me I may someday act on something impulsive and harm someone. Sometimes I cry about it because I never want to hurt people. Really I don’t. Most of these thoughts happen in milliseconds and I have a second part in my brain like a THOUGHT processor/auto corrective thinking reminding me I can’t do that because it’s morally wrong and I am too good of a person to do that and there is nothing to stress over.

Catlove9

Date posted: 22w

What do you say to OCD when you have harm urges?

I am struggling right now with intrusive harm urges. They feel real and it feels like I am going to act any second. It feels like I have to hold myself back, which is a scary thoughts. I am trying so hard not to compulse, but does anyone have tips on what they do in these situations?

bradyx20

Date posted: 15w

don’t know what’s happening to me

i haven’t been diagnosed with ocd but I have anxiety about harming other people/family members and it’s like urges and im scared I actually want to do it? I don’t think I’ve ever been violent as a kid (im 21 now) and the intrusive thoughts don’t go away so im just stuck all day everyday for the past few weeks just thinking and being scared about it and im having all these weird emotions like being irritated and angry I don’t want to hurt people I don’t think idk why my mind is making me think I do I’ve had intrusive thoughts before that I could brush away sure it took like a day or two but this one is different it doesn’t go away and leaves me with the worst fear imaginable and nothing I look up that should be giving me relief is giving me relief + I feel like im not in control of my body and that im just gonna lose it and act on these thoughts it’s just all on a loop and im not sure how im supposed to live the rest of my life when im in constant fear of my self

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Scared of myself

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