Aggravated

Okay so my house was affected by the hurricane Mrs Helene so the people just came to fix the roof days later the men came without knocking or anything he just came and tried to fix the roof which he didn’t even fix. So we have a dog his name is lucky he lives back there so lucky started to bark at the man and he ran from luck. We didn’t even know the dude was back there so now he wants to knock and tell us to get luck which was incredibly stupid what if lucky bit him or killed him and he would’ve had to get put down because of someone stupid actions. So while dealing with ocd I have incredible anger issues that I’m trying to get help with. My sister works from home so she couldn’t watch lucky I had to I’m 17 and lucky is a big dog so I was trying to watch him as I was making my forge but he gets so excited by everything because he doesn’t really stay in the house but when he gets excited he runs he jumps and he likes to sniff doing all that his fur gets everywhere. So as I’m trying to eat and make my coffee he keeps trying to pee so I go to him and pushes his leg down Real fast because he’s literally peeing on the trash can he did this like two times and I feel like I abused him I was getting really frustrated too and I was trying to be stern with him and tell him to sit but he just wouldn’t listen unless I put my hand on his back and literally push him down while telling him to sit and he would only listen for a second so while trying to make my coffee still he keeps trying to sniff everything and he keeps getting his fur on stuff

spy

Date posted: 46w

I was trying to get him to lay down in the living room with me and watch a movie but he wouldn’t just lay down and I had to keep grabbing his collar so he would follow me which I think was choking him and before that I gave him a biscuit so now I think he’s going to die bc of me and I was getting so frustrated with him bc he wouldn’t just lay down In the living room with me and watch a movie so I put him in my mom bathroom bc I didn’t want to blow up on him or hit him or anything not that I do that but I was getting so mentally frustrated and exhausted now I just want to break down bc I think I abused him and I have ocd about abusing and sexual animal abuse literally all abuse and I couldn’t go through my thoughts to make sure I didn’t abuse him he’s back outside now though and I just want to cry because I couldn’t even handle him for some minutes

spy

Date posted: 46w

@spy And he’s a lot to deal with but he’s only a kid so I was trying my best but I couldn’t now I feel like a meanie and when I was pointing for him to sit down he kept flinching I feel like I failed big time man

obrooks

Date posted: 46w

hey there, i really feel for you—i've been in similar situations so many times, feeling overwhelmed and like everything is spiraling out of control. dealing with OCD is tough enough, and when you add in unexpected stressors like this, it can feel like too much. what’s helped me get through these tough moments is reminding myself that OCD is just like a radio playing in the background—sometimes it’s loud and annoying, but you don't have to listen to every word it says. it's important to be gentle with yourself right now. living with OCD is so hard, and you're doing your best in your messy mind. it's okay to feel frustrated and it's okay to feel like you're not handling things perfectly—because who really does? try to take a deep breath and give yourself some grace. you’re doing the best you can, and that’s enough. sending you lots of strength and good vibes—things will get better! 💪✨

averydayimsh...

Date posted: 19w

it’s getting worse for me

i’ve already posted about this before but i keep thinking about it. i was sitting next to a dog and it was laying on its back laying face away from me. i kept getting intrusive thoughts about touching the dog inappropriately. and i was petting the dog to prove to myself that i wouldn’t. i remember i was leaning on the dog. then he kicked me with his back legs three times. i also was rotating my shoulder cause it pops and cracks when i do and i was trying to relieve it. i think i touched the dog and on purpose too, because thoughts were going through my head. after the dog kicked me i sat there for a second just pure panic and i ran to the bathroom, just crying non stop. i dont think i deserve to cry tho. i think my life is a over. the more i try to remember the more scary thoughts of what could’ve happened pop up. i’m just in denial and i want to be sent to a mental hospital.

anonymousgg

Date posted: 18w

Do I deserve to be forgiven? TW animal a***

When I was a child 7-10, I had this wonderful dog. I loved him so much. However sometimes, I would hit him out of either anger or because I liked the way he would lick my hand to say 'sorry'. At age 13, my OCD sparked up badly. I had no idea what it was, but I would bully him. Badly. He was never hurt, but he was agitated. Then I found some kittens and saved them just after turning 14. I let them stay in my room with me for a few weeks to help them. One very early morning, however, they raged me so bad that I began hitting them nonstop. They didn't cry, nor do run away. Hell, all of my pets were never ever scared of me. They loved me for some reason. For so long I've been doing my best to help animals and adore my pets, and I've sworn to never EVER hurt an animal again. I love them so much. I remember though I would never hit them so hard to make them cry out, because I've been inflicting the way I hit them onto my arms and thighs to see how bad it hurt, and gladly, it didn't really hurt. Stung a bit, at most, but doesn't make what I did anymore okay. Do I deserve my babies anymore? Do I deserve to even live? I feel so ashamed and I don't want to use my OCD as an excuse, nor say that maybe I was traumatised because of it because people have been through worse than me, so I don't want to compare. Any small comment will do, thank you for reading

ocdsuxxx

Date posted: 15w

I’m gunna go to the hospital

Intrusive thoughts are supposed to be unwanted but when I’m mad I’m saying out loud “ I wanna stab them” and I feel rage. That doesn’t feel like ocd anymore I’m stressed and my brain also wants me to cover my dogs nose and suffocate him . I’ve covered it before and got anxiety and I’m scared I acted on an intrusive thought by doing that so I’m just psycho I guess about to snap

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