OCD frustrations

That OCD is not easily treatable. No pill fixes OCD. Medication helps, but only ERP bears the chance of getting a grip on it. And ERP is no easy fix either. OCD is like a slimy eel, that wriggles around fighting with all it's might not to get caught, or like a Hydra, that pops out two more heads, where you just cut off one. And, that most OCD sufferers, if not all, have OCD for life. At some point some of us might be symptom free, but like a recovered addict, we always need to stay alert, especially, when life gets stressful/hard, as OCD might try to slip back in, maybe even with a new theme, which at the beginning we don't recognize for what it is.

For me it’s so much of an up/down thing. One moment I feel great and know my fears are pretty ridiculous and then another moment they feel so real and probable.

The fact that the way to deal with it FEEL extremely counterintuitive when you're in the headspace. Like you feel like you're in imminent danger and that there's some horrible threat that's about to get you, and you have to actively choose to be complacent about it. That's HARD. It's like if you could only cure nausea by scarfing down food you hate.

It just takes up so much of my time. Like I don't want to look back at my life and just see this girl living in her head and avoiding the best things because she is thinking of the worst things.

The feeling when a thought creeps back in and your heart sinks

It attacks what’s most important to me

When you are doing really well managing your symptoms and then BAM it rears its ugly head for a few days!

How draining it is. You spend a lot of time thinking the thoughts and doing the rituals, and twice as much time and energy to suppress them. I just never feel like I can devote all my energy to being present in a given moment.

that I fall for the fears and thought spirals every time!!! When i’m out of them, i think of how i won’t believe it again but i still fall for it the next time.

The intrusive thoughts that take over all of the what should be beautiful life moments. I don't want to think about that, I want to focus on my happiness. Seems impossible.

That you lose any sense of who you are. It takes and takes and takes until all that’s left is a shell of being. Inside is empty, constant fear, pain. Every possible outcome haunting us. Every fear claiming us. That’s what’s frustrating.

I have been getting mad and agitated so easy. I hate leaving home. Aaarrrggg so many onion layers

the most frustrating thing is my life has changed, it is very difficult to make life decisions right now, like many things are wrong and many fear, I often doubt the people closest to me now, I avoid many of my friends because I feel like I have changed and my friends will not like me anymore now, I feel like I have to bury my dreams when bad situations come, every little bit of happiness intrusive thoughts always bother me, it is very difficult to live with this, every time I doubt myself I feel like I have been emotionally contaminated when I meet people so I doubt myself is this me or am I already contaminated so im change, ocd is very difficult

You aren’t fully present when OCD has ahold of you. So, you miss out on the important things in life.

The constant guilt

When I am reading through all these comments I feel less alone - thanks to all of you❤️ Hang in there💪

Having it

That you’ll never know what’s fake and what’s reality with it.

im not diagnosed and im not sure if i actually ocd but my thoughts + compulsions sound silly to people like my parents which prevents me from getting proffesional help and they instead just laugh at me and pass them off as a joke

Having this disorder stinks. Basically having non stop thoughts of things you don’t like and cause disgust or fear, I used to be in a constant cringing state. ERP helps a lot. But even with ERP the thoughts are still present just no anxiety attached to them. No matter what I will never like having these thoughts.

The most frustrating thing for me is the fact that recovery is not linear. Most physical illnesses can be healed pretty quickly but learning to accept and have the patience with the ERP process was a hard thing to accept.

How real the thoughts Can feel

Not being able to trust my brain

That it can change its face. You think you’re past an urge or intrusive thought and you’re right back with another one

Feeling great one minute and horribly scared the next :( but we are gonna get thru this friends !!! Keep going strong!! ❤️

I get migraine headaches and tension headaches. Symptoms of headaches trigger my OCD about health

Definitely how “real” the fear is surrounding obsessions. Somehow I think “this time it’s different, if I don’t do y, x will definitely happen!” It’s never true. And if it is, it’s never as bad as the disorder makes it seem. Gotta get used to that discomfort and uncertainty to nullify this mechanism of the disorder.

It’s pernicious, like water always finding new ways into a house.

The people who don't understand. They just assume thay because I have OCD, I want everything neat and tidy. Those who truly know me know that I'm a slob who has trouble keeping it together. Everyone just assumes that because I have compulsions, I'm just a quirky individual. My real friends know that my compulsions eat up a lot of my free time and I'm working hard on them. I just wish that those who don't have OCD wouldn't treat it like it's a joke. While I can laugh at my own OCD, it's not funny if I'm not in on the joke.

I can’t have a moment of peace in silence or in noise nor enjoy what I’m doing as much as I want to. I’m always using all of my mental energy over obsessing and fixing. Not to mention the rage I get when I can’t fix it.

Not feeling satisfied after trying to do things to make myself feel better and it ends up just making my anxiety worse :(

Constantly replaying thoughts and memories. Not able to be mindful

Not being able to tell what's real and what's not real, particularly with health OCD. But it's bad for every theme. That's the core of OCD. Doubt.

My scalp picking

Existential ocd

Doubt. Everywhere. Always.

How subtle it can be

The trust issues that it creates with the people I love

Feeling like I can take 10 steps forward but in a split second be kicked 50 steps back.

That my rational self knows it’s not true! But my brain refuses to accept that

The unknown and uncertainty and that it is not easily treatable.

That you can’t say with certainty to yourself , that you will never act to these thoughts.

That it never goes away. It’s a chronic illness, and there are times when it’s easier to deal with, but it’s always there.

Having hard times with thoughts, or daily routines that never bothered me before.

Believing that the lingering thoughts are really ocd!

It’s always there…even when I’m doing good it can just creep in so quickly. 😆

Feeling great and free of intrusive thoughts for weeks and then they pop back up. Sooo frustrating.

For me it’s the knowledge tgat it’s just lurking around the corner waiting to pounce in hopes that I I’ll be rattled. I know it’s there as sure as my heart is beating but I also know I have so much more in life to be overjoyed about so I expect it and accept it even though I don’t like it at all🤬😘hang on everyone 💕💕💕💕

The most frustrating thing for me which I have learned through my OCD treatment is that it is something I will need to live with for the rest of my life. I have OCD issues with checking cars at the moment. But the lightbulb went off that cars are just the topic for OCD now and there will always be something new.

Afraid of being alone

Nothing can be treated with certainty. We will always, always be uncertain.

Afraid of being seen as a monster

At the moment, when you do well for so long and it pops in to say hello like an annoying neighbour arriving unannounced

No longer feeling safe in my own skin

How Nefarious OCD feels, it plays on your inner most fears, and it also comes up with more things to fear, it’s like having the most evil person in your head convincing you that you’re a bad person and bad things are always going to happen to you.

That you truly believe what you’re thinking is true. Truly.

That it makes me postpone my life, thinking it’s not the right time to date, pursue my dreams, take risks and so on :/

That ocd has something to say about pretty much every decision I make throughout my day.

That I can’t trust my own mind. That any mistake is amplified and that I can’t even soothe myself.

That each time my period rolls around my symptoms (including symptoms that I’ve overcome) come back so hard and fast that it blindsides me and further convinces me that something is indeed “wrong” and I relapse into compulsions. AND that intrusive thoughts have to be accepted and won’t just go away because I want them to 🥲

Not fully having my symptoms under control. Thinking I'm doing good and then I have a bad day hit me all at once. Now I feel like all the work I've put in went out the window. And I have to start over and now I'm embarrassed for having a mental episode.

My frustrations come from identifying OCD, I end up in the rut of using OCD to cure OCD

I think the persistence of intrusive thoughts. I’m usually good at handling them but some days they’ll get me. That being said those are the best days to practice lol

How it makes me stuck:(

People not understanding our mental illness.

The constant wariness and anxiety

Not making sense to other people :(

Not knowing for sure if what I am thinking is an obsession or not

Not being able to trust your thoughts and feelings and therefore becoming almost void of emotion.

going numb

I think the most frustrating part to me is that it took me so long to recognize that what I had was OCD. That’s not my fault but I wish a provider had recognized the signs of ROCD earlier so I could have started ERP

It’s the lack of awareness and understanding of pure-o ocd, it’s the fact that those with taboo themes such as harm, POCD, false memory etc can’t open up & gain support to those around them without harsh judgement.

Having to watch or keep an eye on my mental health all day 👀👀

The physical symptoms that come with rumination and guilt; the twitches, the sensation of my hands being shocked, the stomach cramps, and the headaches from overthinking.

How custom-made it is to each sufferer. One could be hearing symptoms of the condition and notice differences between general symptoms and their own experiences and feel “That’s not exactly what I’m going through, it must not be OCD.” It is customised to whatever your body will perceive as a threat to your safety, identity, values etc

Not being able to tell what is real

Learning to accept your OCD and knowing that is not harmful.

Realizing so many aspects of my identity are just ocd, like I am solely defined by my obsessions

Why do I have intrusive thoughts? Why? What is the reason? I need to understand why? But I'm scared of the answer cause I've had so many horrible therapists who've blamed me, like I'm violent somehow. It is not an urge nor desire it's intrusive...unwanted for a reason.

That each time it hits me, it feels different so I never know if it’s really OCD I’m dealing with.

Sometimes it’s tough to recognize what’s OCD and what’s not. I’ll have something that really bothers me in my head and it won’t go away like a weight on my chest but when ai try to make sense of why I keep coming up with blanks. Something just feels wrong and makes me feel sad but I don’t know why or if I do know why so don’t know what to do about it😂

Having spikes of OCD, where one day you feel pretty good and then the next, it's about the worst you've ever felt. Also, not being able to really talk to anyone about the things you are going through because it feeds OCD even more when you "confess" things.

Being diagnosed with ocd and not being able to go “I have ocd, the fears are not real.” And just feel better and be over it.

For me it takes my energy and motivation away from the day. I find it hard to get out of my head and feel glued to my room.

Not everyone believes that OCD is real. I’ve opened up to people only to have them believe I was the things OCD was telling me. Also, I had to let them. It would be giving in to OCD to try to convince them otherwise. It’s a tricky illness.

When you think you’ve nailed it with a certain diet, and it just comes right back outta nowhere and stomps all over your dreams.

Can't stop!

I relate to so many of these things. I’m trying really hard to get out of my head and past a panic attack - I hate them so much.

I'll never be happy

Missing the time where my OCD was dormant.

Urges that try to force it's will on you

I am afraid of being alonr

I am afraid of being alone

That I’m really what my brain is telling me and that it’s all true.

That it is INSIDIOUS!!! Every time I think I have it under control, something else is festering under the surface. It tricks me and makes me think it’s a real danger worth worrying about. It takes a lot of effort to even figure out where my OCD is attacking!

The way to "cure" or get better it is painful. It is literally go against the fight and flight response more or less. It is like enter in a burning building, you dont want to, you think you have to leave, make it stop, but no, you have to sit there and see how with time, the fire doesn't affect you.

I totally get where you're coming from. Its like I convinced my brain somehow to not trust myself. Its a complete mind eff in my opinion lol. How do we maintain our sanity if we can't even trust ourselves? Ocd sucks

Obsessing over things that are in the past or not in my benefit to revisit.

HAVING A FAMIKY THAT DOES NOT UNDERSTAND!

i can't bring myself to eat normally because i think something bad will happen to me or others

Hoarding and the hurt it causes others

People not understanding what OCD is, and being misunderstood frequently because of that. I feel like it’s not ever worth explaining it anymore.

that it will never go away

I am in medical school and wanted so badly for my OCD to improve when I got here because I would “have less time to think about it”. That didn’t happen. It steals my time. I have intense fears that I will end my life if I fail here. I just want to be free.

How it makes it virtually impossible to have any real relationship with anyone because I doubt the relationship no matter what it is. Family, friends, romantic, it doesn’t matter.

Ocd attack something importand to me

Lost as I cant trust my own thoughts

the DPDR that comes with my existential thoughts and another theme I’ve been dealing with for the past two years that I just cannot shake yet

In church voice in my head says, " No one likes you"

Definitively the guilt aspect of everything, and wobdering if my ocd is real or I just faked it and I'm exaggerating it

Not being able to do simple things while not being able to stop doing irrational things. Not being able to control my reactions even when I understand it's ocd. So frustrating, makes me hate myself tbh

Having to hear people say that ocd is just cleaning freaks which it’s really not and it pisses me off cause that’s why we’re so uncomfortable talking about it

And trying to get over compulsions and still enjoy your favorite things that triggered your ocd in the first place like anime with pocd and etc cause I heard it’s a very common trigger :( unfortunately which is sad for me

Knowing that these fears once were not issues for me. Like, I could have the "what if" thought and just go on with my day. It's not that I didn't know about the feared thing but I didn't care... 🤔

Afraid of being alone

I don't know if it's OCD but I have several different movements I have to do over and over. Like tapping my toes on the floor/ground? I'm ALWAYS tapping my right side with my right elbow!? . Anything with the number 3 triggers me.. Example: I'll never get gas at a pump that has a #3 on it or #13!? Is that more of a superstition or disorder? Or are they one in the same? There's many more but I think you get the gest of it!? I do these things every waking second it seems like it anyway. One more that I do that's really bad that I can't stop and it's highly noticeable is I take my right arm and straighten it out to the side raise it up straighten it out constantly flicking my hand out straightening my elbow until my entire arm is straight over and over again so much that my shoulder is very sore. Could this be terrettes? I do make grunting sounds when I make these movements as well like the toe tapping and shoulder/arm/elbow movement's PLEEEEEEEASE I MEED HELP! This is so tiresome!

feeling so much identity doubt that I have frequent thoughts of suicide. I miss enjoying life and knowing who I am.

Deebs your words are exactly how I feel very well said

having to say no to compulsions that keep coming back because they want me to do things that arnt under my control.

Precvents me from going certain places, doibg certain things cuz of the bad memories that are ties to. those places, people, things SIGH!!!

And I am drawing in my Beach Coloring Books 🌈

Afr

I don’t trust anyone anymore

Geez!!

Not being able to fix it.

Try I g hard but I feel nibidybsees MYCH difference

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