Feeling very frustrated today

I have come so far in my therapy and days like today feel like I’m just still buried in OCD. Sometimes it is so insidious and I don’t realize I’m in a loop. Once I do realize it, it’s hard to get out. I thought sharing here may help, as I never have, but I know you guys will understand. It’s so hard to decipher between regular anxiety and obsessions and compulsions. It has all just become one big ball of panic. Anyway, I’m just struggling today - so thanks for listening.

vasqueztim

Date posted: 40w

oh my goodness, i really feel for you and i’ve been there so many times! what’s helped me get through these tough moments is to remind myself that OCD is just like a pesky radio that’s stuck on the wrong station—blaring noise that doesn’t make sense and isn’t what you want to hear. but remember, you’re just doing your best in your messy mind, and living with OCD is so hard! it’s okay to feel buried sometimes—those days happen, but they don’t define your journey. sharing here is such a brave step, and we all get it! try to be gentle with yourself and know that it’s okay to not have all the answers right now. you’re making progress even if it feels like you’re in a loop today. hang in there, you’ve got this, and brighter days are ahead! ~sending you so much hope and strength!~

robert98

Date posted: 40w

i can really relate to what you're going through and i wish i could just give you that magic reassurance to make it all go away— but i know that wouldn't really help in the long run! think of OCD like a persistent, annoying salesperson who just won't stop knocking at your door. giving in and buying what they're selling only makes them come back louder and more often. i know it's tempting to answer, but sometimes we just have to let them knock and eventually they'll move on to another door! you're definitely not alone in this, and it's so brave of you to share here! your OCD is just being extra annoying and loud today, but remember—it doesn't define you or your progress! just do your best to ride the wave and not listen to the OCD chatter. we all have those days, and you're doing amazing by reaching out and recognizing it. sending you lots of strength and hope—tomorrow is a new day! 🌟

amy59

Date posted: 40w

I’m so sorry you're feeling this way. I know how disheartening it can be when OCD seems to sneak up on you despite all your hard work. I remember having a similar experience when I was struggling with my own OCD. I had a tendency to get caught up in checking rituals, and sometimes, just like you, I wouldn't even realize I was in the middle of a loop until it was too late. Please know that you're not alone in this, and you have come so far already. It's okay to have days like these. Be gentle with yourself and remember that recognizing the loop is a step forward. You have the strength to get through this, and sharing your feelings is a powerful step.

wanda81

Date posted: 40w

I'm so sorry you're feeling this way today. I can really relate to those moments when it feels like OCD is just overwhelming everything, despite all the progress you've made. I wish I could tell you something to make it all feel better, but we both know that wouldn't help in the long run. It sounds like your OCD is just being especially chatty and annoying right now. Just do your best to sit with it and not listen to its noise. Remember, you are so much stronger than it wants you to believe. Keep going; you're doing great.

Luke_McElwee

Date posted: 24w

Losing my shit, freaking out

Idk if this post is even worth it but it seemed like a normal day for me, called off work due to the weather so I get to just stay home and play games all day. Easy day besides dealing with the constant and unbearable battle with my intrusive thoughts/feelings. Took a shower and I just had constant thoughts, (heart palpitations are pretty constant) ended up breaking down and bawling my eyes out. I was diagnosed with HOCD and ROCD about 2 months ago and since it's just gotten worse. It feels as real as it can get and after talking to my girlfriend about the anxiety attack, it feels even more real. I have no desire or enjoyment from what comes from my brain, and at this point I'm on my knees begging the big man upstairs for my old life back, how do I go from being obsessed with women (sexually and emotionally) to pretty much doing a 180 overnight (with the obvious anxiety and worry behind it. No real desire obviously). I'm just at a loss, I've done a little ERP and it seemed to help with the brain fog but besides that, everything that it does to someone, I have. And again there's the doubt I even have OCD and I'm in straight denial. It just sucks.

issphra 🫶🏻

Date posted: 18w

It feels more real than ever right now :(

I know I am going a bit cuckoo because my period is coming up, but lately it feels like every intrusive thought I have, I *like* it. Like I genuinely feel like I like it, and then I immediately panic because I start checking. Mentally, emotionally, whatever it is. And I know that is a compulsion. I *know* that. But it feels so real that I cannot stop myself. Every single time I check, it still feels like I like the thought, and it is driving me absolutely insane. It is especially the POCD thoughts. They feel so real. I feel like something is going on mentally, like some kind of confusion or glitch, because I swear I was not like this before. I would have intrusive thoughts, and they would feel real, but not *this* real. And I do not even know if this is normal. I know OCD is **supposed** to feel convincing. That is the whole thing. But I have never experienced it to this extreme. I have never gotten the same thought so many times and still felt like, “Oh my God, I did enjoy it,” even after checking a million times. It is like no matter how many times I check, it feels like I liked it. Especially during intimacy :( and it is making me lose it. Then I start thinking, “Well, I am in distress, so maybe that is proof it is not actually me.” But right after, I am like, “What if I am only panicking because I care about what society thinks and not because I actually have morals?” And then I spiral again, wondering if maybe I just care about how I am seen rather than who I am. I am panicking so much no today. I had to take my Xanax today for the first time in two months, and I needed three separate doses. I really need some support right now.

Anonymous_bi...

Date posted: 15w

I’m new to this and I’m afraid

Not sure what to say. Just that I am so tired of dealing with OCD - I’ve had it for most of my life and as a 40 something woman, I’m exhausted. I’m tired of being misunderstood and mistreated. I’m tired of seeing relationships that I have dwindle bc my friends and family are overwhelmed with my ruminations and reassurance. I’m embarrassed bc I overwhelm my friends and family with whom I’ve trusted my personal thoughts with and I keep thinking that they can help me through stuff only to be let down. I’ve yet to meet another mind like mines who is complicated but trying to survive because I have children and want to see them grow. I’m tired of feeling defeated because someone took advantage of me and my thoughts. It’s so exhausting but I’m ready to try this because I know I need help. Not sure if this is triggering I’m just ranting bc I’m so lost.

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