- Date posted
- 43w
Non stop tracking
My contamination ocd is taking over this week, and I'm tracking and isolating every time I touch something that's a trigger. Pretty frustrating.
My contamination ocd is taking over this week, and I'm tracking and isolating every time I touch something that's a trigger. Pretty frustrating.
I'm sorry to hear that you're having a tough time with your contamination OCD. Identify and challenge irrational thoughts related to contamination. Ask yourself, “What evidence do I have that this is true?” This can help weaken the hold of OCD. I assuming you're still in therapy, so if you're in therapy, discuss a gradual exposure plan with your therapist. This involves facing feared situations in a controlled and gradual way to lessen anxiety over time.While it’s natural to want to avoid triggers, isolating yourself can reinforce OCD. Try to gradually engage with triggers without performing rituals. Use grounding exercises, deep breathing, or stress-reduction techniques when you start to feel overwhelmed. Write about your feelings and experiences related to your OCD. This can provide insight and help process your thoughts and emotions. Remind yourself that it's okay to struggle and that progress takes time. Be gentle with yourself on difficult days.
The main issue is a little extra stress this week, and I think it's more of a subconscious stress. It probably sounds dumb, but the election outcome has me feeling uncertain about the future. And that just has me feeling my triggers a bit more this week. I read your bio, and you sound like a carbon copy of me. I started with nocd in Feb/March of this year. My ocd revealed itself during the pandemic as well. In hindsight, I can see some tendencies I have had throughout my life, and even anxieties, but I never understood what anxiety really was until getting slammed by my ocd. Thanks for your post.
@Searching for strength You're welcome. And actually isn't dumb triggered by the election, even I saw one of the members post a few times during the months about how stressed they were about the election and the future. I agree with you about the pandemic and other things. The last time I commented on your post was when you were in a rescue situation with those cats. Everything's going to be okay soon. I know you know all the techniques. Just try to be patient and let go of any negative feelings you may have.
@Amara Thank you for your posts then and now. :) The cats are such a nice distraction and boost to my spirits some days. Sometimes I wonder what the rescued kittens are up to these days. The strays that were too feral for foster living are still around, however they're fixed now. They've come to determine that the time I leave for work, and the time I return home, are breakfast and dinner time. :) They help me out on my tough days for sure. I have compulsions with washing up to my elbows after petting then, butt they bring me so much happiness, especially one that has comes to enjoy being petted. They also provide spontaneous erp somedays.
Oh man I have been there, I know that feeling, and you're not alone
Don't mention it.🙂 I know I used to have a cat before when I didn't have OCD. I like animals and pets in general, they are so special and make us happy. Also, cats are cute, funny, and naughty, and it's good to hear that they help you on hard days.🙂 I can see your favorite cat in your profile picture.
sorry this is super long i just wanna know if anyone else has been thru something similar bc i feel super alone 🩷 i have super bad contamination ocd. it was bad already but my house was like my safe space until a few months ago someone brought something into my house that i considered ‘contaminated’. and so then i felt like that part of the house was contaminated, then it spread to everything outside my room (since family is moving around touching stuff) and then somehow i got convinced everything in my room except my bed is contaminated and i need to wash my hands after touching it. in my mind its like the contamination just infinitely spreads to things after the tiniest bit of touch. idek what im afraid of anymore or even what the original thing was but i can’t let it go. when i have to wash off contamination i have to wash at least 4 times or until it feels right, or sometimes take rlly long showers and wipe down all my stuff. i even throw away food and clothes or just whole items sometimes because they feel so contaminated i don’t want them in my space. i can’t be super near people or have anyone touch me, and i also can’t bring anything new into my room since it had to go through the entry of my house which feels contaminated. i feel like all i do is lay in bed and then wash my hands and do compulsions so i can go eat or do other stuff around the house. also i never go out because i’m bc people outside make me feel dirty, and i hate thinking about how many people have touched stuff in stores or in public and stuff. so im just in my room worrying all day. i feel so trapped and the contamination/avoiding it is all i think about anymore i barely have time for anything else and im never present when i talk to people because im worrying about if i accidentally got contaminated. im starting erp next week and knowing that im going to have to expose myself to things is really freaking me out. does anyone else have this kind of ocd ? im exhaustedddd 🥲🥲💔
I know I keep talking about this and I swear I’m not trying to be annoying but over the weekend I had gotten some new Clorox wipes because I was running low on some at home. I noticed when I came home I still had 2 half full containers left. When I got home everything was fine until I accidentally knocked my setting spray off my bathroom counter. Now mind you I had 2 warts on my foot about 4 months ago and my ocd makes it worse by making me believe the virus is still on the floor. Immediately when it dropped, I cleaned it with a Clorox wipe. This is where it went down hill and my brain started to spiral. After disinfecting my setting spray, I started second guessing if the Clorox I used on it was from the same container I used for the shower floor. I usually wear gloves before getting a Clorox wipe and sometimes I don’t. I was trying to do “ERP” and instead of washing my hands 3x… I just washed it for about 5 seconds . I then put my lipliner and gloss on and now I feel like I contaminated my lipliner. I threw my lipliner in my makeup bag and my makeup bag has a blush brush , hilighter brush and some other makeup stuff. I just wanna throw that whole bag out now. It’s exhausting and this might seem dramatic but I couldn’t get out of bed because all I could think about was everything being contaminated in my bathroom. I leave for Florida in 3 days and I’m freaking out because everything isn’t going how I want it to. I’m just exhausted. I just bought some new Clorox wipes from Kroger and one of the Clorox dropped on the floor and now I think that’s contaminated and now I’m confused which one fell on the floor and which one didn’t. They were next to eachother and I forgot that fast. 😞☹️ Before going to Kroger I felt like god was talking to me or my intuition and telling me don’t get another one. So now my minds making me feel like it dropped on the floor on purpose. Idk know if it’s god talking to me or my ocd. I was sleeping all day because I don’t wanna get up and go in my bathroom and I don’t even wanna put my makeup on because I don’t wanna take a chance of getting a wart on my face. I never did a deep clean after my wart but I have used so much Clorox in the bathroom to just to dinsifect. I’m still nervous to even do a deep clean because I feel like I’m going to pick up the virus or bacteria. Also if there’s any Christian’s reading this I would appreciate just a prayer bc I’m tired and exhausted which I know seems funny from being in my bed all day. But mentally I’m exhausted. I don’t even wanna go to Florida anymore. I know the only way to get a wart is to get it from skin to skin contact. Oh! I almost forgot I had a dentist appt today and this girl was shadowing my dentist and she greeted me and shook my hand. It happned so fast. I didn’t go home right away and wash my hands and I’m freaking out about that too. I’m just overwhelmed . 😞 I know this was long and I appreciate you reading.
contamination ocd has really been messing with me the last couple of days. usually i only struggle when i can connect something to possibly throwing up, but this time it doesn’t matter. so earlier, i took a shower and i also use a wash cloth to wash my body. after i showered i cleaned up my dirty clothes and towels. then when i came back to grab my phone, there was a soap speck on my phone so without thinking i just wiped it on the back of my crewneck i was wearing. well that then spiraled into me thinking what if the soap was from my dirty wash cloth. i know most of you are probably thinking it’s clean since you use soap to clean ur body. well i clean every inch of my body, including my bottom so that’s where my anxiety is gravitating towards. this sounds so ridiculous saying it out loud, but i just have so much anxiety over it. i tried my hardest not to change but i did. at first i just changed my crewneck, but then i had to change my shorts cause my crewneck touches my shorts. but then i changed my shorts. and now i feel like my shirt is contaminated cause i was wearing it with my other shorts before changing. moral of the story, i just have so much anxiety over it and i feel like i shouldn’t because it’s really not a big deal. and i don’t want to change again because that seems ridiculous to me. plus now i’m connecting the contamination to my bed since i was laying on my bed before i changed. i hate life, this sucks.
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