finding it hard to believe someone will understand my complex OCD brain, i have lived/do many taboo themes and have other traumas. i don't know how I will find an understanding and loving spouse, and if I will ever.
Focus on yourself. Start by loving and forgiving your own self. Accept yourself with its flaws. Once you are in peace with you, the rest will follow.
I can totally understand what goes through your mind. I have dated two guys who also suffer from OCD and it did not work. Dating someone who doesn't have mental health issues is also really hard, as, in my experience, their understanding and being supportive has a limit. I currently have a partner, but it is a constant struggle. That being said, there's always hope, that an OCD sufferer finds somewho who looks beyond their mental health issues.
Thank you, I wish you the best in everything? May I ask how you approached the conversation, was it before you two started dating, after, how did they react, were you scared, etc?
@AnonymousUser60 Well, I had been open about me suffering from OCD. When POCD first started I told my new partner, that I suffer from it. The next partner I told about POCD after a few months of dating and he cut me out immediately. He didn't end our relationship, but he started to only go out without me and he grew very cold and distant, till I ended it. My current partner, I told that I suffer from OCD and depression, before we even started dating. I also told him, that I will never tell him about all my intrusions and to this day I never told him about my sex themed OCD subtypes. We are together for nearly 2 years now. With the two guys who also suffered from OCD, I had been open about all my subtypes, but two people who both suffer from severe mental health issues, wasn't a good match, at least in my experience.
@Zoë_84 - Thank you for sharing! I'm sorry about your experiences with the guy who grew cold, this is exactly my fear. OCD feel so read so I understand why the guy I'm with would that to too, it's much a self blame disorder. May I ask how you have kept yourself from telling him, I feel like I would go crazy since one of my compulsions is confessing. I hope things are working out with you amazingly now and yea I get you, sometimes I wonder if him having OCD would help, other times, I fear it would create too much tension.
@AnonymousUser60 I confessed a lot, especially to my mother, but at some point I stopped. I just don't feel the need to confess anymore. Also, after many years of doubting that I suffer from POCD, at some point I finally believed it and as that means I neither am, nor believe that I might be a paedophile, I don't feel the need to tell him. I knows, that children and animals trigger me, he even tried to get more information in regard to that, but I kept it vague.
I had this same fear not that long ago and I’m blessed to say all of my anxieties were quickly proven wrong by my partner. I have evidence of this very same concern going back years written all throughout journals. However, when I told him about the intrusive thoughts, he holds me, kisses my forehead, and tells me that it is no reflection of who I really am and he sees me no differently than before. I told him he must promise me that if it ever gets overwhelming he communicates that with me, but he has NEVER told me to stop coming to him with these issues. In fact, he will just exist with me, holding me, until I’m ready to talk about the intrusive thoughts because he doesn’t want me to bear it alone. All of this to say, love is so very patient. And shared joy is double joy but shared sorrow is half a sorrow. There will be someone that eventually proves all of these anxieties wrong for you, I pray this gives you some hope.
Thank you, happy for you. It's so scary living with this disorder and telling others! May I ask how you approached the conversation, was it before you two started dating, after, how did they react, were you scared, etc?
@AnonymousUser60 Of course! I told him right before we officially started dating. I wanted to clear the air and not constantly be wondering how he’d respond if he knew. Immediately after I told him, I typed out a prayer begging God to have him be understanding, and in that prayer I admitted I already loved him, which also made me recognize that if he didn’t respond well, it would break me. But I was extremely terrified of how he’d respond and I was worried he’d see me as a monster. Ultimately, he thanked me for telling him, he then told me he didn’t see me any differently. (He and I are both Christian so he also reminded me that I am a daughter of Christ and loved and forgiven). And it was shortly after all of that that he told me he loved me for the first time.
Do you guys ever feel like you'll never be able to find love because of all the obsessions and intrusive thoughts you have? Especially if you have have real events it's based on? It's definitely something that comes up for me frequently. I feel undeserving of love and that no one would understand me.
Hi Guys I’m wondering if I find a person will he accept my ocd and weird behaviours or is it too hard. How it works in your relationships? Is it possible to find love while having OCD?
Hello! I’ve been with this guy for about a year and a half. He has OCD. I very recently found out that I do too. My compulsions are largely hidden, so he never suspected and has no idea how my OCD manifests. I’m still figuring that out for myself as well Is anyone else on here with a relationship like this? I’m open to any and all helpful advice or resources to help us navigate this together.
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