Adults only When browsing for porn, does anyone get really disgusting results that have nothing to do with their search at all? Stuff that is clearly not fine or disturbing when you search for very basic things. It triggers my POCD like crazy and I hate it so much
Are you seeing a therapist about your addiction to pornography?
I have been for a while now. It's the one thing majorly holding my life back. I hate it. What I hate even more is seeing grey area content or things with straight up fictional minors when I only want to see adults. All because the search results are so stupid and inaccurate
Have you considered going to the gym and getting into sports. After a day of physical activities, you won't even have energy for that stuff, and you would be building a stronger body.
I've considered that many times but I lack the motivation and the money to go to the gym. That will change soon though. I do want to go because it will be a step in the right direction for me. It's just easier to default to this because it outweighs everything else I enjoy and it's just so easy to get to
@BigGyro09 You don't need to go to the gym to be active. Walking or running, playing soccer, buy some weigh at home... Don't make excuses, just jump on it. You owe it to yourself
@hanysm@gmail.com I sometimes workout at home. I have trouble getting used to it but it's something I have to do
@BigGyro09 Man look, know that this is something under your control. You owe it to yourself to stop
@hanysm@gmail.com I was able to control it for the majority of this month and I wanted to get through the month but when my anxiety is just too high or if I'm thinking about it way too much, I just can't. I just end up giving in.
@BigGyro09 Listen when you get the urge try delaying this thing for an hour, then one more hour and keep pushing it back. If you slip, it is ok, but start by two hours and so on. Maybe this would work for you.
@hanysm@gmail.com That's the problem, the urges just don't go away sometimes. I don't know why that is but they just don't.
@BigGyro09 Of course they won't go away... With doing that "eventually" it will fade away. It takes time, so you must be patient and persistent.
@hanysm@gmail.com Yeah.. I think changing a habit for another will help a lot If you don't mind me asking, are you an adult? I did only want adults to talk about this
@BigGyro09 LOL š... I am 60 years old, but act as not my age at all . lol
@hanysm@gmail.com Oh, I see. I understand, haha. I was just checking. I do appreciate your help and that you've helped other people. I just wish this were easier somehow
@BigGyro09 Yes you were checking because you living with fear of being in contact with minors. I know exactly why you asked, and you knew I am not a minor, and still asked, and I wanted to give you the "reassurance" you want. Now make what we talked about happen.
Yes. I find it particularly weird, that there is so much stuff on the internet which contain teen, incest, or step parent - step child in the title. I'm sure, it's only in the title and not the real content. But titling a lot of those videos like that must mean, that those titles are searched for/in demand, which is extremely gross.
It's because people are so desensitized and watched so much of this stuff that they need those kinds of taboo to make it as exciting as the videos that were once normal. But I just find it disturbing. Whenever I find myself relapsing, I just go for very plain content, but it constantly gives me disturbing stuff or grey area fictional stuff. I'm so sick of it.
@BigGyro09 Yeah, that stuff really is gross. Also the "professional stuff", where they guys look like buffs and the women look like real life blow up dolls, just gross. If you want to watch porn, I think amateur stuff is much better, as it is more realistic and most of the time not gross and perverted.
@Zoƫ_84 Well, I don't want to watch any of it, but I can't help myself. It's compulsive and it's out of my control at times. But yeah, that stuff just doesn't so it for me. I'm not into the taboos.
@BigGyro09 Have you addressed watching porn as a compulsion with an OCD therapist?
@Zoƫ_84 Yes I have but I'm going to address it again. It really is affecting me in a lot of ways but I just can't stop. Not even now I can't
@BigGyro09 Be kind to yourself and patient. OCD is a sneaky and creative bugger, that tries to torment us as much and as best as it can.
@Zoƫ_84 This makes me feel like a loser sometimes. But I have to remind myself that everyone has seen porn and there are just those that prefer it and those that don't. I don't prefer it but unfortunately I'm addicted to it. I also know that I don't like those bad results even if they do come up. They're disgusting. I would never in my life search for stuff like that but it just finds me anyway sometimes. I hate it
@BigGyro09 You are not a loser. āŗļø
Working on kicking the porn habit myself. Never realized just how badly years of dependency on that cheap dopamine altered my vision of reality. Anytime I stumble upon it now it inadvertently flares my anxiety up just because I feel/know I need to stay away. A complicated thing for some of us.
Yeah, it's hell. The anxiety really is the worst of it. It actually have me a headache after watching it. It went away but it affects me in a lot of other ways. Still, as I say all of this, I'm still having trouble kicking it, even now in fact.
I fear I may have POCD, I am terrified of being a pedophile. my symptoms were initially strong surges of anxiety. I made the mistake of looking up what pedophilia is about and now I fear I am one. I have a bad masturbation problem and that didnt help, as now I feel a weird feeling down below and its distressing me. I'm only 20, this never happened to me before and now I only feel confusion and doubt, Ive cried like never before cause of this.
I thought I'd gotten over sexual obsessions, since they haven't been bothering me at all until I had a flare up yesterday. I usually struggle with masturbation due to a combination of both anorgasmia from SSRI medication along with intrusive thoughts, so I thought that an adult film should work fine and went on the hub as per usual. Everything went well until I "finished" and looked at the video title afterwards. My stomach dropped as the title had the word "teen" it in. I felt nauseous and gross because I'd previously struggled and became horrifically suicidal due to the pocd I thought I had under control. Now I know that by the word teen, it means an adult actress that's 18-19 and I'm only 20. But I can't shake the feeling that I'm gross for watching and that it was illegal material, even though I am fully aware that it wasn't, so I've been ruminating over it endlessly. This is more of a vent, but I feel like all the progress I've made with my ocd just went down the drain ā¹ļø
Iām worried about times when Child P*rn or suspicious porn videos have come up in the past. I tend to use Twitter for porn and itās not the most moderated app out there but I was never looking for videos or pictures or anything related to that. Unfortunately stuff still has popped up and Iām just worried about if my reaction was perfect because I have intense POCD I want to say itās nearly as severe as it can get so I just feel as if I remember times when something suspicious came up and I stayed for a moment to make sure I wasnāt attracted or maybe left and came back to be sure I was safe and didnāt like it and Iām afraid this counts as seeking out or engaging in illegal content that would get me in trouble. Iāve never once looked this stuff up and anyone who creates saves distributed or likes this stuff I believe deserves prison time for life but Iām just so worried that I didnāt react in the way I shouldāve Iām 20 years old so Iām relatively young and Iām jus worried about what this means about me any one else deal with anything similar?
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