Relationship/Cheating OCD Help needed... Hey guys! How do I deal with cheating OCD? I'm just getting into a new relationship, I've explained everything and really don't want my OCD to get in the way. How can I do ERP for this? (and any other theme really)

uzro

Date posted: 5y

Sam, I hope you understand I’m not trying to be mean, but it sounds like you are compulsing to me. The Challenge that ocd needs is the allowance of the thought and the anxiety it provokes regardless of the scenario it might bring (whatever cheating scenario it might bring you) . Confessing are usually reassurance seeking, even if you feel like telling because of the guilt. Ocd is simple but very meticulous. Hope you can carry on with this newfound relationship while carry ocd with it

Lewis

Date posted: 5y

Yeah I thought that :/ How do I do ERP for having thoughts I may have cheated on my partner? I've stopped nearly all compulsions such as reassurance seeking. But 90% is in my head. A compulsion is sometimes replaying memories and thinking back, I don't know how to expose myself properly?

uzro

Date posted: 5y

Well I’ll tell you something that works for me. really try to think that you have cheated and go on about your day with the whole guilt about it, and try to be best partner you can possibly be while feeling guilty about cheating and try to do it everyday. I will warn you that anxiety levels will be high, intrusive thoughts will increase and intrusive feelings (such as shame and guilt )will increase. staying mindful and value driven is the map through it. Sorry bud there is no easy ways with ocd, hope you can accept that.

Lewis

Date posted: 5y

I feel like I've already walked through hell, so I think I was forced to accept it. Thank you. I will try that. Over time has it got easier for you?

uzro

Date posted: 5y

Acceptance is not something that is forced, but the willingness to have uncertainty and feelings about it. Does get easier, I don’t know, you might also not get better and accept that as well. Sorry is cruel but there are not other options but to live with this. But the only hope I can give you bro is to live a value driven life, your loved ones, career and what are you willing to die for

Lewis

Date posted: 5y

? Love your optimism. At one point I was desperate for help. Now I've accepted it might not get better, it's funny... When I gave up on life that's when things started to improve. It's made me close to fearless about normal life. Over time things have improved, I just want to know if I'm doing ERP that it will hopefully improve things haha! Do you find exercise helps?

uzro

Date posted: 5y

I have to be honest with you about how erp works, I can’t wish you to ocd to go away, or that it will be okey. But I can you tell that if the goal of yours is to feel better then you are just setting a bigger cycle for ocd to creep in. the whole problem is seeing things as good or bad, things just are. Values=meaning live by those is tough I get it. And yes exercise helps as long as you don’t to scape the thoughts or anxiety

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