Morality OCD/Magical Thinking

i told myself before that i would cheat on in person exams and now i am working on grad school applications and i used chat gpt to bounce of some ideas and make my work sound better...However after I wrote my essay, I realized that using chat gpt may not be ethical. And sometimes with my OCD I'm scared I made promises in the past and then forgot. Like I'm scared I my parents will get harmed if I cheat. And for my essays, I used the unedited parts again and there are two paragraphs that chat gpt have me a rough draft but i modified a lot to sound like my own but i got nervous and deleted those two paragraphs and rewrote them without looking at anything but I'm scared bc even the new things I wrote were still with the ideas chat gpt gave me and idk what to do...im really scared