I can’t with this anymore another worry

@OCDNoThankYe Thank you :( I appreciate that very much I feel so lost

@OCDNoThankYe Aren’t you scared that having high blood pressure like that everyday will lead to stroke or heart attack if you don’t get medication this is my fear I will go to the doctor to retake it but I feel like they will put me on blood pressure medication and even on medication I feel like I will have a heart attack or stroke :( that day at the doctor I was no having anxiety and it was high so that’s my concern other time I was having anxiety and it was low so confusing sadly I can’t afford Theraphy I m trying to do it on my own but accepting the anxiety and moving on feel like is harming my body causing my blood pressure and all this bad symptoms no good for my health and will lead to the worse so I m trying to no feel the anxiety so it doesn’t harm my health but I know that’s no how it work

@Monii - Hey, so what you're kind of doing is asking for reassurance which is counter-intuitive with OCD. What I will say is that I went to the doctors, had multiple heart monitors etc, I would obsessively check my pulse and blood pressure pretty much all of the time and was constantly terrified. What I did was stopped all of my compulsions, worked out and sat with my anxiety instead of running away from it when I had those intrusive thoughts/sensations/worries of dying pop up. I know you say you can't afford therapy, but look into resources out there. You need help, you deserve to be happy. Please just try and reach out and look for resources. A lot of therapy places will do a sliding scale based upon income. Just make sure you look into a place that specializes in OCD. I don't deal with that health related OCD like I use to, it does get better, I promise. This too shall pass.

@OCDNoThankYe Sorry about that I m aware that I m asking for reassurance I did the same I had those test in the past I want to start working out but I read someone here the other day said their blood pressure goes up when working out but I still gonna start doing that soon I will look it up on how to start stopping compulsive behavior little by little I definitely need and deserve to be happy all of us do I will be looking for that thank you for your kindness I m happy to hear you don’t deal with that anymore my switch themes here and there but health always in the back

@Monii - Yeah, themes definitely do switch. I've been on a hardcore struggle bus the last two months about a new theme which has been awful, and I did have a slight reoccurence of health related OCD as well but I was able to navigate through that one pretty quickly. You just have to focus on not doing those compulsions and be mindful when you are doing them, so that you can catch yourself and recognize that what is going on is OCD.

@OCDNoThankYe Yes exactly what you do when you get bad health ocd thoughts for example I get the one that I will have a heart attack or stroke I been keeping busy letting it be there but is there all day constantly never go away don’t give me reassurance I know is no good

@Monii - Yeah, so with me what I try and do is be mindful about when I'm thinking. If i get caught up in a thought, I'm going to use one of your examples to make it easier, I say to myself "I'm having the thought that I'm going to die from a heart attack or that my heart's going to give out." Then, I would stop for a moment and sit with the feelings of the thought, and then return my attention to the present moment and whatever I'm doing. Don't run away from the thoughts, acknowledge them, sit with the anxious feelings and let them go like a leaf that's floating down a river. Sometimes, the reason why the thoughts "sit" there is because you are actually ruminating on the thought, and you have to break yourself of that by practicing something such as the above.

@OCDNoThankYe Whoah that sound so difficult is like I m agreeing with it to happen and I mmno defending my self or taking care of my health so it doesn’t happen plus I have kids so I don’t care about being here for my kids ? Since I m no taking care of my health ugh but I understand is the therapy and that’s how it work I been ruminating all day I kept answering the questions what if and want to take my blood pressure bad but haven’t yet so just been crying all day I don’t want to have this thought about me dying me make feel sad for my kids and of course ocd telling me is my fault because if I make sure I go to the doctor then I won’t die every year is the same but different theme I called my doctor today to take one of those test to find a good medicine for me I never been on medication because of the fear of making me worse or having a bad reaction like hallucinations or stuff like that but I m ready to try something definitely

@OCDNoThankYe I really appreciate you being here for me new year and I m loosing it already :(

@Monii I know it’s insanely hard, but you can do it. I know you can. OCD attaches itself to things that are important to you, remember that. And right now, your health is important to you and being there for your children. I’m super proud of you for speaking with your doctor about medication, I hope it gives you some reprieve. Take care