Please if you see this answer if you have faced this

Hey. So I think I’m recovering from a false memory-real event ocd. I wasn’t able to function these last couple of days (eating, working, etc..) and now I’m feeling bit better because I was done with the anxiety of uncertainty even tho I know somehow there’s pretty much fair evidence that back me up. But ocd doesn’t work that way, it will just keep trying to convince you and make you doubt so I’m done engaging with it. But I find myself feeling guilty of not giving it my attention. I had a thought that sounds disturbing about how I’m back to -kinda- being normal again. Does this happen often when people try to break through the endless cycle of guilt? Whenever I feel okay, or just chill and not anxious, I start to panic because why am I fine or chill when this may or may not have happened. “YOU NEED TO FIGURE IT OUT” it keeps going, or else I am a bad person. Sounds related?

Amara

Date posted: 30w

The guilt you feel when you start to feel better does often stem from the nature of OCD. OCD can create a cycle of anxiety where one feels compelled to constantly seek certainty or reassurance. When you don't engage with these thoughts, you may feel guilty for "not doing enough" to address them. Recovery often involves learning to live with uncertainty. It's natural to want to resolve doubts completely, but OCD thrives on this need for certainty. Accepting that some things may never be fully resolved can help reduce the power these thoughts hold over you. Feeling normal or relaxed can trigger a sense of panic because OCD can equate your well-being with being a bad person if you don’t actively engage with your thoughts. It's important to recognize that it’s okay to enjoy moments of peace without feeling guilty.OCD often uses the phrase "You need to figure it out" as a way to compel you into compulsions (like ruminating or seeking reassurance). By resisting this urge, you're working toward acceptance, which is crucial in breaking the cycle. Remember that thoughts do not equate to reality. Just because a thought feels disturbing or convincing doesn’t mean it reflects who you are or what you’ve done. Try to observe them without engaging or evaluating their truth. Consider using grounding techniques or mindfulness practices to help redirect your focus when these thoughts arise. This could involve deep breathing, physical activity, or engaging in hobbies. Writing down your feelings can help clarify your thoughts and reduce the weight of guilt. It provides a space to express your experiences and track your journey toward recovery.

Yamimuu

Date posted: 30w

I have something pretty similiar, I think it's a pretty common experience in ocd

raghad_

Date posted: 30w

I’ve never thought of it as an ocd things tbh. I’d even sometimes find myself feeling guilty when being happy. May I ask whats your similar experience with this? If it’s totally okay w you to answer.

Yamimuu

Date posted: 30w

@raghad_ Basically, when I feel okay I tend to feel extremally scared and ashamed because "what if Im a bad person" and I have to come back to my intrusive thought and overanalyze it/figure out if Im truly a bad person or not, if I did something wrong or not. It's some kind of overwhelming, suffocating shame if I dont do so

amelia:3

Date posted: 25w

how to deal with real event + false memory??

im going to be vague here, but basically i did something in the past that i regret and it became a huge point of my OCD but i have talked to my therapist and i have mostly moved past it. i watched a video by an OCD youtuber that really put it into perspective. anyway, i have been with minimal worry for a few days, but now im having worries related to i think false memory? basically it’s like “oh but what if i said/ did this and just forgot that means i harmed this person im a bad person”. to me it sounds like textbook OCD but im just wondering if anyone else has experienced false memory / real event at the same time. i have a really horrible memory which is making it even more stressful. any responses are appreciated!

Pushingpissed

Date posted: 25w

Feeling “normal” again

Anyone else feel that when they aren’t experiencing a theme that their ocd is almost non existent. It almost makes me feel like I’ve been faking it, and also makes me feel ridiculous for obsessing over things. I feel sorry for myself :/ I know that my themes are valid and felt very real in the moment, but after I “get over” them I just can’t believe that I was obsessing over something that either wasn’t true or didn’t apply to me. I would also like to know how to prevent themes from reoccurring. Health, religion and existential OCD themes tend to take turns throughout my life, I just didn’t know that was it ocd. Trying to break the cycle.

anonymous00001

Date posted: 20w

Looking for “proof” that it’s not OCD

Hey all, I’ve been having some ebbs and flows in recovery, but for the most part I’ve really had a lot of improvements in quality of life since starting treatment in 2023. Something that really trips me up is ruminating on my past and looking for “evidence” or “proof” that the things that I’m obsessed with are real and not OCD. I spend quite a lot of time doing this. I wasn’t fully aware I was doing it until recently. Example: that I’m secretly gay and lying to everyone (I’m bi), that I’m a horrible person deep down, that I’ve never actually loved any person including my family, that I have the “wrong” political or religious beliefs. I look for proof in every corner of my past. It makes some sense that I think this way because with my previous therapist, who I saw for 8 years and did not diagnose me with OCD, we would look for evidence and proof that my obsessions are irrational and I learned to deal with them that way. At the time it was a lot of health concern and contamination themes, but I literally learned to ruminate and search for relief. But I just kept getting sicker and sicker until I got diagnosed with OCD. It’s a frustrating compulsion that keeps showing up for me. What if these scary things are true? What if it’s not OCD at all and I’m in denial? Have I lied my way into thinking I have OCD? It’s so hard. Anyway, I’m curious if anyone else has come across this in recovery? Let me know your thoughts and I hope you’re well. ❤️

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