I am going crazy about the future, lots of intrusive thoughts came up in my head, sometimes I forget its my ocd and I start to call myself useless, worthless, piece of waste of life, a nothing, that I shouldnt be born, that this world is not for me, wishing something bad happens, wishing my death everyday. Thinking about suicide or attempting again... to sleep and never wake up again... And when its not about the future, its POCD, wich destroys my days, my emotional, my mind, everything. Please do someone else feel the same? Tell me I am not the only one like this...

andrewt_

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 5y

I am starting to worry about the future much more intensely at the moment so you aren’t alone ! I know it’s scary , but I think the best thing you can possibly do is try your hardest to live in the moment , and know that worrying about it won’t change whatever happens. Also , you have so much time to decide what you want to do with your life. ( I’m assuming your in college or below , sorry if I’m wrong ). The idea that you shouldn’t have been born is you being way too hard on yourself. You make a difference in the lives of many people I’m sure , and just by being a human you have worth. You matter. And even if I don’t know you personally , I still care about you and want the best for you. I believe everyone was put on the earth for a purpose , I mean look at mind , morality , the fact that “ everything happens for a reason “.

Heello

Date posted: 5y

Thanks. I dont know why, but I always forget about the anxiety and that I must live in the present. I dont know why, but i keep forgetting it, and always need to remember. I think Ive always been hard to myself, I have a low self steem and pretty much time I hate myself. I need to thank you. You helped me right here. And knowing I am not alone in this makes me feel a bit better. Really thank you :)

hannie

Date posted: 5y

You are not your thoughts. You need to tell yourself this every time. You have OCD, you are not OCD. Do not let it convince you otherwise. Also remind yourself that everyone on earth has had bad thoughts.(about every topic) The only difference Is we can’t let them go. We have to think about them until we figure out why they are there on the first place. The thing is, we aren’t suppose to analyze those thoughts. They are thoughts that mean nothing. It’s actually the opposite of who we are. Our brains are reminding us that we don’t like the thoughts so it wants to protect us and show us that we fear it. Trying to keep us away from danger that doesn’t even exist( like caveman days, except there was really lions and tigers to fear lol) our brains don’t know the difference so it keeps us on alert. I’m sorry you go through this , but ending it or wanting to die won’t solve problems. It passes it down to the people who have to live without you. You have to realize that this bad place is temporary. You may always struggle with OCD yes but it won’t always be this bad. You will ge through the hard times and have amazing moments to enjoy. You will have bad days too (that’s when you love your self extra and take care of yourself more). Everyone has bad and good days too. Even if you didn’t have OCD, you would probably struggle with something. Please stay strong. Live is worth living. Even with OCD. I’m thinking of you and will pray for you. You will be ok❤️

Heello

Date posted: 5y

Thanks for your kind words. I really looking into fighting against it. I will not give up to ocd or the intrusive thoughts. I will do everything I can to became better and stronger and you helped a lot to me replying my post. It gives me hope and light, thanks :)

hannie

Date posted: 5y

@Newstage I’m so glad to hear this. You are worthy of happiness, You are worthy of a happy life and you will get it! Thoughts are just thoughts no matter what feeling come with it! You can do this. Please always promise to keep fighting. You will find peace, I promise. If you ever have a bad day, don’t be afraid to vent on here about it. This community it amazing for that. Also self care is so important and it’s not selfish st all. Taking soothing baths, showers, walks, eating your fav food, good movies, relaxing music, meditation, as well as light exercises and good food all have helped a little on my bad day. No matter how alone this disorder makes you feel I will be here to tell you that you’re not. We can get through this together. You are so strong and brave and I believe in you❤️. You are so welcome and I’m glad I could help!☺️

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