Intrusive thoughts about my dog

Hey guys, so since I started taking Wellbutrin about a week ago or so, my OCD has become so much worse. I keep getting intrusive thoughts about my dog dying. He is 12 years old and shows no signs of slowing down as he is tiny and still runs around like a puppy. I get constant intrusive thoughts that he will die soon and it hurts so bad that every time I think about it tears come to my eyes. I worry that I will never enjoy playing with him or cuddling him again because I’m so afraid of him dying and feel horrible sadness and anxiety whenever I see his cute lively little gray face. How can I be comfortable with these thoughts? I love my baby more than anything in the world and I would like some support or some comfort. I’m stopping Wellbutrin because I think that’s causing my OCD to worsen the worst it’s been in a very long time. Here’s a picture of him so you guys can see how cute he is :)

[Deleted]

Date posted: 6w ago

Deleted reply.

Chamomile_Te...

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 6w ago

@Horrible person. Yes he is. I’ll never love anything as much as I love him ❤️

dee012

Date posted: 6w ago

Hello! Ur fur baby is adorable. My best advice to you is to not judge your thoughts, or fight them. Let them be and still enjoy your time with your dog. All the same lovin, walks, treats, pets. Eventually it will get easier even if just a little. Death is a very real worry a lot of people have so I’m not going to just say “not think about it”, but just don’t ruminate on it. I worry about things like this with aging family members, but I just tell myself even though the thought of this hurts me, I’m still going to love my pet all the time and continue to live life, as them passing , anyone passing matter of fact, is out of my control, and I’m not going to stress myself out about things that are out of my control. It is okay to be sad❤️ or worried at times, but what’s most important in this present moment is the way u show care and love to your fur baby, and the time you spend together.

Chamomile_Te...

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 6w ago

@dee012 Thank you. I really appreciate your advice and commentary :) I wish I could love him without intrusive thoughts, but that kind of thinking I know makes the intrusive thoughts stay for longer. I’ll try to not let them bother me ❤️

nae nae

Date posted: 6w ago

He's adorable 🥹 I'm really sorry you're having these thoughts that are acting as a disruption of time spent with him. I haven't had this fear with pets, but with family members, and it took a very long time to get over. It's like mourning them while they're still alive, and it's awful. He seems like a very healthy and lively pup from what you described. I really agree with the comment above, though. They explained it better than I ever could! 🤍

Chamomile_Te...

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 6w ago

@nae nae Yes exactly. Mourning them while they’re alive. Maybe if he was younger I wouldn’t feel this way but then again I can’t think like that or else it reinforces my intrusive thoughts. I fear that by the time I get over this fear he will be gone, but I know that’s my ocd trying to stay relevant. Despite knowing this though it’s still hard :(

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