Lit555

Date posted: 31w

OCD is strong

I can't take it anymore, my OCD is stronger than ever, I have false memories almost every day, sexual ones, if it's not a false memory then intrusive thoughts that I'm gay, etc. When I was with my girlfriend, I had some false memories and intrusive thoughts, but you could almost say they weren't there then. And I really don't want these false memories and intrusive thoughts. I've had intrusive thoughts about my Buddy, my dad, and random people. Please help me It's like something evil is trying to control my thinking.

Justsurviving

Date posted: 31w

I understand what you're going through it seems this is a common thing with all of us in this community. But as you said FALSE memories it's not real. Try to distract your mind I know that it's hard and that those memories feel real but adjust what you do in the mean time. Go for a walk, read, meditation

Lit555

Date posted: 31w

But it's so realistic, but at the same time I know it's a lie and I would never do this and that it only exists in my head.

Lit555

Date posted: 31w

The problem is that my brain perceives it as if I did these things, but none of this ever happened, but if I start living, I think it will disappear, because I'm obviously not living, I'm just making up nonsense. In my head because my brain is bored but if I start living it will disappear anyway and I can live like never before

needtoescape...

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 31w

OCD is strong, but you're stronger. Don't give up. Things will get better.

Lit555

Date posted: 31w

I told my family about this but they didn't believe me.

needtoescape...

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 31w

@Lit555 - I'm so sorry, that must feel really lonely.

Lit555

Date posted: 31w

I always think of my friend as a brother and I always think of him that way, but suddenly I had an intrusive thought about him and suddenly I felt anxiety and panic.

Lit555

Date posted: 31w

When I was with my girlfriend, it was only once, never again.

Lit555

Date posted: 31w

And I have always looked at her as a sister and I look at her as my girlfriend and the love of my life, the one I want to spend my life with.

Lit555

Date posted: 31w

But now I am full of false memories and intrusive thoughts. If there is no false memory, then there are intrusive thoughts. If there is a false memory, then there is only that, but there are no intrusive thoughts.

Lit555

Date posted: 31w

I'm afraid of all this, they'll never have a boy and they'll never have a boy like that, they only want to be with women, I only want them, I only want them and I only want to live my life with them, their boy is just a friend, nothing more

Lit555

Date posted: 31w

OCD is so scary, it gives you intrusive thoughts that you don't want or desire.

Lit555

Date posted: 31w

But I don't want these intrusive thoughts and false memories to make me feel terrible.

Lit555

Date posted: 31w

I've always considered myfriend a brother and I've always considered my ex-girlfriend the love of my life, but it's so bad that when I get false memories, I don't have any intrusive thoughts when I don't have them.False memory, then I remember that I randomly had this intrusive thought about it and it makes me anxious, I don't desire this and I don't want this and I don't think this

Lit555

Date posted: 31w

Sometimes I always get intrusive thoughts, just random thoughts, I like that and I immediately say I don't think anything like that at all and then anxiety etc. comes right away and it's bad and it's in my head.There is, but I'll say it right away, it's just an idea that's not mine.

Lit555

Date posted: 31w

I realized that all this is because the brain is bored and so, as they say, your brain directly gives you such intrusive thoughts that are contrary to you. They say that when the brain is bored, it tortures you.

Lit555

Date posted: 31w

It's so scary, you don't think about anything and you randomly get intrusive thoughts that are the opposite of what you think and feel, and because of that, you fight with yourself and get anxious.

Lit555

Date posted: 31w

I saw a woman just now, I say, I know her, and I see that she is an acquaintance of my friend's, and it occurred to me that this woman is. My friend liked her because she said so, and I felt that she was there on the stage and everything, and that she was moving towards her.The bastard moved, he's on the scene, and after that I get the intrusive thought that I'm jealous, etc. xd

anthonycaronna

Date posted: 19w

False memory

Has false memory OCD affected you so badly that you feel that a lot of your memories period are unclear, vague, fuzzy and can’t recall correctly?

Vee <3

Date posted: 19w

Heyyyy!

So my OCD has been bad lately. I’ve been ruminating and obsessing over my sexuality again. And it just keeps getting worse. I hate it so much. I try to sit with the discomfort but then my ocd does the backdoor spike. And the groinal response is what keeps me looped. It SUCKS. I am not attracted to men, but my OCD is trying SO hard to convince me that I am. There have been days where I’m just so mentally exhausted that I “accept” what my ocd tells me and I just walk around a hollow, lethargic shell. But then I rethink it and I feel better. It feels like I can only find my TRUE self when I tire my nervous system out enough that it literally breaks down and has me suicidal and hopeless. And then accepting my OCD’s “truth” (that I’m attracted to men) feels like a burden and a chore. I woke up today from an OCD dream, tried to go back to sleep, and my stomach kept cramping bc I was so anxious and ruminating over my intrusive thoughts. I’m starting to doubt it being OCD anymore. My brain is too tired to fight and cry about it anymore.

Sexual Orientation OCD

Anonynmous19

Date posted: 18w

Relapse

Im struggling with false memory pocd sexual what if thoughts. I discussed it with three therapists. Did CBT and ERP. Ive been free of this intrusive thoughts for 11 months and now its back and i feel like at square onewith doubt. Redoubting things ive already did therapy on and disproved. I felt inner peace and fine for almost a year and now back to feeling stuck ruminating questioning whats real memory and whats false memory even though deep down i kmkw its false memory i have evidence against the thoughts and its so ego dystonic theres no proof as my therapist said.

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