- Date posted
- 25w
Feeling annoyed at my loved ones
I know OCD is a hard thing for those around us to cope with, but man… I feel so dismissed by the people in my life. I actively stopped seeking reassurance from them — but they can still tell I’m sad, so when they ask me why, I tell them, and this is what I get: My mom: “Oh my god, you’re on this AGAIN?! You’re driving yourself crazy! If you refuse to go on pills, I don’t know what to say at this point.” My boyfriend: “This is just getting repetitive. You’ve been so sad lately, and if you’re gonna be a bummer to be around, then I don’t know what to say.” Honestly, I don’t feel like my support system is very good, but maybe I really am just driving them crazy and need to own it? Because, believe me, I wish I could just stash it all away and be okay, but the whole issue is that I can’t. Plus, ERP literally tells me to do the opposite, and I’m still learning how to do ERP properly, so it’s gonna take time. I started ERP therapy. I bought self-help books and I’m reading them. I’m doing meditation daily. I’m moving my body and trying to keep doing what makes me happy. But, it seems like if I’m not 100% better immediately, no one has patience for me.