About denial

Sometimes there is doubt about whether you are deep down creating responses through OCD and deceiving yourself. I think we would know if we were in denial. That's why OCD bothers us so much. But even though we might be, look: The fact that you choose to believe anything that you are the person your OCD tells you is proof that you are not. People in denial know they are in denial and just don't care. Look at us complaining about this. There is no way that knot is OCD.I hope you can see the wonderful person you are and have the peace you deserve.🤍

vincenzokeez

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 25w

People with OCD tend to fear that they are in denial. People who are in denial generally know they are in denial of their reality. Alcoholics who say that it isn’t causing issues yet friendships have left them, family have left them, job break down because of behaviour towards being under the influence However, asking someone with POCD who has an intrusive thought/feeling of a groinal response when near a child may think/feel that is their truth because they felt aroused or they liked the thought. People with ROCD for example don’t wake up every morning feel depressed because of their relationship or feel they KNOW it is wrong. They fear it is wrong, they fear being in denial, they fear cheating, they fear making a mistake that it could be the wrong partner and fear they have to leave because they will find out a truth that they have to. Unless you were someone who was a Pedo and you knew being like that was wrong and not accepting you for who you are would be in denial. Unless you where in a relationship where you where not happy and you knew that is denial

Anonymous

Date posted: 25w

Exactly! It's so hard to notice this, right? Living with OCD is um hell. Thank you for your words! I hope you are okay. 🥺🤍🙏

spelamarela

Date posted: 25w

So if i was really in denial i would just not think about it and act like it’s not true?

Anonymous

Date posted: 25w

By the concept of negation, yes. Because for example, if someone knows they have cancer and goes into denial, they simply know it but they live like thats not true. The process of denial is knowing that something is true and denying it. In our case, how is there denial if we precisely feel that it doesn't make sense? If it is so contradictory to our values, there is no point in being in denial. Because if we were, we would be assuming that everything is true. But it's not true. And it's not true because it bothers us, because we do everything to know the truth. And if the truth were that we are what OCD says, we would simply know it. We wouldn't need answers. And I know it may sound like we are looking for answers to explain ourselves and accept everything. But deep down, if we are looking for answers, it is because there is no clear one. And if there is no clear one, it is because we do not know if it is true. And if we do not know, there is no way to be in denial. Note that I am talking about the healing process. Because in healing, it may be that the treatment requires you to not look for answers. But that is not being in denial. This is not feeding the OCD after you understand that its OCD. I apologize if it sounded like that. I hope you are well. I think it was something I wrote much more about my experience. But remember that each of us has our own doubts, and they are all from OCD. What I said doesn't answer something that's bothering you. I said this based on what came up for me. I'm sorry if it answered something you were wondering about. And if it did, I hope this has comforted you that it is OCD. Otherwise, ignore all of this. It is still OCD. Searching on the internet can be very dangerous for us. The ideal is to be under the supervision of a therapist. I'm sorry if I caused you anything. Sorry for not can help, but know that there are professionals who can do this. I'm here if you need me too. Take care. 🤍

spelamarela

Date posted: 25w

@Anonymous So i think i have hocd (i hope) and it feels like i know that im a lesbian but don’t want to accept it yk? It feels SO real and that there is just no other way. But i just can’t accept it. It also feels like there is just too much proof and that my fear is real. Im tired if this and think about it all the time every single day since november. So thank u for this but rn i just don’t know what i really am and what im not.

Anonymous

Date posted: 25w

@spelamarela I'm sorry you don't know how to say it, it's really hard to deal with OCD. I hope things get better for you! Do you know Christie Hodges? She has a YouTube channel and if I'm not mistaken she has HOCD. Even if she doesn't, she has videos about it. I hope this helps you. Sorry I can't help you, But know that there are therapists who are the people who can do this and do it very well. Dealing with OCD in therapy is the best way to heal. Know that I'm here if you need me too. Take care of yourself! I'm praying for you.🙏🤍

spelamarela

Date posted: 25w

@Anonymous Don’t be sorry! Im so thankful that you tried to help me. And you did a little so thank you so much!💕

Rayanswaid

Date posted: 25w

Realizing That Thoughts Are Just Thoughts.

I’ve been thinking a lot about how OCD changes the way we see ourselves, but I recently realized that I am not my thoughts. Just because a thought pops up doesn’t mean it’s true or that it defines me. I’ve started learning how to see OCD for what it is—just a disorder trying to trick me—and I’ve become stronger in dealing with it. Has anyone else here had a similar realization? How do you handle these thoughts when they show up?

521mullax

Date posted: 24w

I know the truth but I’m just doing compulsions….

I know the truth deep down but I am just doing compulsions to try and convince myself that I have OCD. I try to look up and find things exactly the same and me in experiences how I feel and everything else and it becomes worse when I can’t find the same person as me. I know people do compulsions to make sure they love there partner but I feel like I do compulsions to CONVINCE ME it is ocd

anonymous00001

Date posted: 20w

Looking for “proof” that it’s not OCD

Hey all, I’ve been having some ebbs and flows in recovery, but for the most part I’ve really had a lot of improvements in quality of life since starting treatment in 2023. Something that really trips me up is ruminating on my past and looking for “evidence” or “proof” that the things that I’m obsessed with are real and not OCD. I spend quite a lot of time doing this. I wasn’t fully aware I was doing it until recently. Example: that I’m secretly gay and lying to everyone (I’m bi), that I’m a horrible person deep down, that I’ve never actually loved any person including my family, that I have the “wrong” political or religious beliefs. I look for proof in every corner of my past. It makes some sense that I think this way because with my previous therapist, who I saw for 8 years and did not diagnose me with OCD, we would look for evidence and proof that my obsessions are irrational and I learned to deal with them that way. At the time it was a lot of health concern and contamination themes, but I literally learned to ruminate and search for relief. But I just kept getting sicker and sicker until I got diagnosed with OCD. It’s a frustrating compulsion that keeps showing up for me. What if these scary things are true? What if it’s not OCD at all and I’m in denial? Have I lied my way into thinking I have OCD? It’s so hard. Anyway, I’m curious if anyone else has come across this in recovery? Let me know your thoughts and I hope you’re well. ❤️

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