Ericseal18
- Date posted
- 38w
Harm OCD
what is the obsessive thought to “kill mom” around still. It was here for a month then went away for a few months. Now it’s back and feels like it’s not going away.
TexasOCD41TexasOCD41
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 38w
The thought isnt the problem, its how you react to it. Everyone has these thoughts, more commonly than you would ever believe. OCD makes it a problem becuase you FEEL anxious about it and you attach meaning where there is none. a thought is just words lined up to make a sentence in your head. literally nothing more. We don't control our thoughts either, we only control which ones are important. This thought is spam, junk mail, has no meaning, it will come and go all your life. I have that same thought too, i never pay attention to it, just spam. toss it out.
Ericseal18Ericseal18
- Date posted
- 38w
@TexasOCD41 How do I toss it out? Like not really pay attention to it ?
TexasOCD41TexasOCD41
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 38w
@Ericseal18 - its something you learn to do in time. its not that your not paying attention to it cuz its like ( don't think about a pink elephant) you just thought of a pink elephant right? when you TRY to not pay attention, you end up hyper focusing so what i mean by not paying attention, it just, don't RESPOND to it. don't try to make it go away, don't try to passify it, don't try to analyze why its there. Honestly, make it sing-song would even help. just say "kill mom" over and over and over and over like to "happy birthday" or something like that. kill kill mom mom mom kiiillll mooooommm ( happy birthday toooo yoooouu) its basically teaching your brain to stop seeing a thought as a threat ( because thoughts are not threats).
Ericseal18Ericseal18
- Date posted
- 38w
@TexasOCD41 Yeah the song thing sounds like a great idea but I feel like a bad person when I turn something like that into a song 😭. I’ll keep trying that though.
TexasOCD41TexasOCD41
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 38w
@Ericseal18 - " feel like a bad person" feelings are not facts. Thats OCD manipulating you're emotions. you might FEEL like a bad person, but that doesn't MEAN you ARE one. its nonsense. its like that meow mix commercial where the cats sings the whole song. its just mocking the words that mean nothing. like when you say a word in your head over and over and over and its starts to sound like a nonsense word that isn't real. that's how you can beat ocd. you replay it to death and it eventually becomes OBVIOUS that its nonsense.
TexasOCD41TexasOCD41
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 38w
@Ericseal18 - when you are able to step back a bit, you see its LITERALLY a phrase in your head.. nothing more. i just thought of it myself " kill mom" ok... lol, here, ill think it a few more times. ill even up the bet and insert " i WANT to" first. ohh.. i ACTUALLY just said it out loud..... guess what? .... I'm not going to lol,( i HAVE thought about it when I'm SUPER mad at her lol but not actually wanting to do it just i say " ughi could just KILL her" and then i tell her i love her and give her a hug and say ill talk to her later lol. its alllllllll just thoughts.
Ericseal18Ericseal18
- Date posted
- 38w
@TexasOCD41 Appreciate it, my mom know I have these thoughts which makes it easier and she actually came up with the lyrics and I did indeed laugh at it because how stupid it was
Ericseal18Ericseal18
- Date posted
- 38w
@TexasOCD41 I genuinely think you helped me recover so quickly. I’m gonna make that my go to when I get that thought.
Ericseal18Ericseal18
- Date posted
- 38w
@TexasOCD41 I genuinely think you helped me recover so quickly. I’m gonna make that my go to when I get that thought.
TexasOCD41TexasOCD41
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 38w
@Ericseal18 I’m happy to help :) it really can be easy if we let it.
TexasOCD41TexasOCD41
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 38w
@Ericseal18 I use humor on all my harm ocd thoughts. I went into a hardware store recently and saw this huuuge wrench in talking like 2 feet long. I immediately thought of how easily it would be to unalive someone with it and the damage it could do in a pretty vivid mental image. I just said “ wow what an EXCELLENT murder weapon… if I could even lift it… yeaaa I watch too many horror movies “ then bought the air filter I went in for and enjoyed the rest of my day lol.
- User type
- Therapist
- Date posted
- 38w
That sounds like quite the struggle you are having. Have you considered looking into therapy options to help you face this anxiety head on?
Ericseal18Ericseal18
- Date posted
- 38w
@Deborah Ward Yeah march 5th, i hope this is normal for everyone
- User type
- Therapist
- Date posted
- 37w
@Ericseal18 - As an OCD therapist, I can say that we hear about these type of thoughts often, so you are definitely not alone. I hope your appointment went well for you today and you can start seeing some relief! I know the first steps can seem like the scariest at times.
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 38w
Struggling with this right now too. Really trying to focus on not wanting it to go away and just accepting what's in my head. It's hard because I truly don't want to have these thoughts, but accepting them is the only way I can get through this. Can't wait to look back on this and laugh. Keep fighting. We got this.
Ericseal18Ericseal18
- Date posted
- 38w
@Anonymous So I should be like “I want this” mentally ? I’m sorry, im just being crushed by it.
AnonymousAnonymous
- Date posted
- 38w
@Ericseal18 No no. You don’t have to be like that. By acceptance I mean accept that it’s just a thought in your head that you have no control over. Don’t push it away because that’ll only give it more energy. You got this. We’ll get through this!!
SarahSarah
- User type
- OCD Conqueror
- Date posted
- 27w
Harm ocd Hi do you guys ever feel like you want to
Related posts
Anonymousalways
- Date posted
- 24w
Always in my head
Im sorry I have to come on here and ask for advice once again, but as some people on here know I have been suffering with ocd since I was around the age of ten, which only got worse as my beautiful children came along. or nearly 60 years Ive had every type of ocd there is, they always come down to the same thing , not wanting to ever harm the people I love more than anything. I had got on top of this and was managing well, I know I would never harm anyone I love ever and would never ever want to, no more of the hypothetical scenarios for reassurance either , but its like every time I try to stop the mental compulsions intrusive thoughts come back after a few days, As I was in between going to sleep and was half awake the horrible words ' hope ***** dies I cannot even write the name down who it was about. I do not know where it came from but I am constantly getting upset about this as it was about someone I would give up my life for. I think you can probably guess what I mean without me having to say it. I do read a lot of posts and ocd podcasts and once read someones story wher they used to wish bad things and I have never been able to stop worrying in case something like that happened to me . Could this be what it was that has caused it ? I think Ive also still held onto something from when I was a child when I used to worry that thinking something too much could make it happen,, Please, please give me some addvice and thank you,,, sorry for the long post.
ItWillBeOkay...
- Date posted
- 21w
Harm OCD
About 2 months ago, I sliced my arm so deep in an attempt to make this all go away.. as there was blood spurting like everywhere my life flashed before my eyes and I could hear my parents laughing in the room beside me. I started screaming for help as my eyes flooded with tears. How could their little girl do that to herself?? I was able to get to the ER and have my arm stitched up.. making my attempt a fail. But I’m so scared. I don’t want to do something like that again. I’ve never seen my parents cry except for then. The fear in their eyes haunts me up to this day. But that’s the only thing that relieves my pain. Can someone help or relate to this ???
Anonymous
- Date posted
- 20w
I feel like it was never OCD, or it was but now it feels different.
There are moments when something takes over me, like I have to fight myself (literally restrain myself) from acting on my thoughts, like causing harm to my parents or brother. I get these feelings that feel so real, like they are genuinely my own. There are moments when I feel like I like them, and it makes me question whether this is truly OCD or if it's me. Then I wonder whether this is me lying to myself, because I feel the urge to smile at the thought, or feel like I have some pleasure. I check whether I like them, and then I feel like I do, so I stop immediately. I feel like my old self is gone, and I've become this person, and that it was never OCD. Right now, as I type this, I feel like I'm lying to myself. There are moments when I feel like my brain splits, as if this is my new personality. Or there are moments when I feel like it might feel liberating or freeing if I do it. I genuinely feel like this is not OCD. There are moments when I stop the thought, and I feel like it's out of principle, as if I don't truly want to stop at that thought. I truly can't picture this to be my life now. I never had these thoughts in my life until two and a half months ago. It truly makes me question whether it was OCD. I don't get why. I used to view my family as my world, and now my mind is making me scared and feel like my room is my only safe place from them, from me.
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