does anyone else get really vivid intrusive thoughts of the person who you are talking to (or close to physically) just randomly striking you violently? i keep getting them when i’m just talking to my dad one on one in the car & i get a flash of intrusive thoughts of him grabbing my hair & shoving my face in the dashboard. it gets me so anxious :’)
i personally don't get these but i get what you mean! that sounds super scary
Hey there, thank you for the vulnerability here. I can see how that would be very scary in the moment. Unfortunately OCD will bring about anything to try to get our attention. In case you're interested in ideas on how to respond to these images, I've attached a few resources below. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=riKw294RZMw&t=63s https://www.treatmyocd.com/what-is-ocd/info/ocd-stats-and-science/i-get-disturbing-images-in-my-head-is-it-ocd
This is just typical OCD. I used to get thoughts of throwing people off a banister. It’s normal. Just remember, it’s important not to “fight off” or “fix” the thoughts. Just let them run freely through your head. This can be uncomfortable, but it’s the only way to beat OCD.
Hey I get these but with a different theme and it feels sometimes like I’m getting surprised or a jolt they are extremely vivid and not fun.
I've had similar experiences. I think it's pretty common. I'm sorry you're going through this right now!
Hello Maxine, I truly appreciate that you shared these intrusive thoughts here. OCD will infiltrate areas of our lives that are most in line with our values and lead us to doubt reality. I'd encourage you to consider the ways that you have been tempted to react in these scenarios. We engage in compulsive behaviors as a way to neutralize scary thoughts/imagery. When we are ready, ERP is a great way to learn how to tolerate the distress these intrusive thoughts/images bring about while avoiding rescuing ourselves with compulsions. I wish you all the best!!
Hello, I thank you for sharing your experiences as it can be helpful for other people to read that others are going through similar things as them. Vivid thoughts and images are a big part of having OCD. I like to describe OCD as manipulative because it finds sneaking ways of getting us to question what we know to be true. OCD can get you questioning yourself, your thoughts and others. The important part is trying to take note of how you are responding to these thoughts because the way you respond can turn into compulsions and the best way to beat OCD is to resist compulsions and lean into the thoughts.
Has anyone had this fear that they were abused in childhood and just don’t remember? And that’s why you have harm related thoughts? Like, I kept thinking if my mom abused me in childhood even though I had not ever thought or felt that way before, it came up a few months ago when my therapist was talking about complex PTSD which then freaked me out thinking something super horrific happened in my childhood and I just don’t remember it. My mom and I are super close, always have been. My mom was protective of me, but never in an abusive sense. She would just worry whenever I went out with friends and such, and wanted me to text her every now and again to let me know what was going on. Even in adulthood she sometimes wants to check in on me if I go out somewhere (even though we live together) and she even tells me to not worry about it and she knows it’s just her anxiety that gets the best of her, thinking something bad happened or what not. Anyway, I kept thinking about this and I thought is this abusive behavior? My mom wanting to check in on me? And I think of course not, it shows she cares and loves me. It’s not like she’s a hounding my phone every second or what not, just a text or a call to see what’s up. But my mind takes it further and thinks this is controlling behavior or something. So it goes back to the was I abused in childhood and I just have repressed memories, and that’s why I get harm thoughts towards my mom. I’m always thinking there is a deeper meaning. I never even thought that before in my life, about the abuse part, but it has become stuck in my mind and I’m scared it will ruin my relationship with my mom.
This may upset some people reading so here is just a warning that these are disturbing I don’t know what to do to make the bad thoughts stop. My mom recently had a baby, my little brother. I wasn’t exactly happy about this pregnancy, but I have nothing against my brother. He’s adorable and silly. Nothing against him. But I feel like these thoughts bug me because what if deep down I do resent him because I didn’t want my mom to have another kid? What if I did act on these things because I hate him? What if I just lose it and do something? It’s all so illogical, I know. Never would I ever want to do that. But there’s times I’m watching him for a few minutes for my mom and my brain just shows me an awful scene of me brutally hurting him or killing him. Or I’ll be holding him and my brain shows me a scene where I purposefully drop him or I just hurt him so badly. I’ll be walking near him and my brain tells me I’m going to stomp on him. It shows me such bad things. I have intrusive thoughts all the time, but this is different because there’s a semi good reason I “could” do it. That being, I wasn’t happy about the pregnancy. And it scares me. I’ve started crying because I was so scared it was going to happen. I have to back up away from him or sit down so there’s no way I can do anything. I feel horrible. I don’t want to hurt him. And I’m so scared I will. But I won’t. I’m hoping this makes sense to others who struggle with this. Because to anyone else who’s never gone through these things I’ll sound insane. And sound like a psychopath. Thanks for reading. Any help would be appreciated.
I’m having a very bad evening with my intrusive thoughts. I was doing really good dealing with them but tonight one hit me hard. I’ve been having a lot of different intrusive thoughts but I’ll have one occasionally about hurting my mom or my dog who I love and they’re the only family I have in my life. They’re my world. I was helping my mom put away the dishes and I had the big kitchen knife in my hand and my intrusive thought was you could stab your mom. And then my brain said I had a twitch in my hand and that meant I wanted to do it. Let me just say that I wouldn’t hurt a fly. I actually caught a fly in a glass and put it outside instead of killing it this evening before this intrusive thought happened. I’m such a gentle and compassionate and caring person and these thoughts instantly cause me to have a panic attack. And I have no one to talk to them about. I know they’re hard for my mom to hear and I don’t want to be any more of a burden than I already am. I do desperately want to tell her and have her reassure me that I’m not crazy or a psycho. Then my thoughts wander to if your hand did flinch could you be a psychopath. Is hurting someone in you. I know it’s not but I feel like my mind is out to get me and hurt me. I’m working so hard and I thought I was doing so good but I need to know why I have these thoughts. They’re not ok. I need someone to help me make sense of why. I know we aren’t supposed to ruminate but I shouldn’t have thoughts like this about people I love and care about the most in the world.
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