bmaria

Date posted: 5w ago

Rocd?

My psychologist tells me because my thoughts are based off of facts/ broken boundaries which is why I am having thoughts of am i in love , am I settling , and feeling guilty I should let him go to find someone who wouldn’t doubt him that I do not have rocd. She states rocd is intrusive , irrational thoughts not based off of real facts and I may have ptsd not ocd. He kissed someone else before we were official and he finds a certain type of female attractive that I find disgusting . So I spin about these issues all day long to the point I’m so unhappy with him and had to break up . It’s been over a month now but I’m still severely anxious and depressed The thing is I can’t stop thinking about this 24/7 with severe anxiety and depression and nothing is helping me . Can someone please tell me their thoughts

OneDayAtATimee

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 5w ago

Is your psychologist trained in ERP therapy or Ocd? Because what they said isn't accurate, as Ocd 100% can attach to real life events that occurred as well. My Ocd does that 24/7 and it happens to others all the time, hence the name "real event Ocd," and I have some of the same dating obsessions as you do and I’m getting treated for Ocd, not PTSD. Please please please- I suggest you get diagnosed by an NOCD/ERP therapist for 2nd opinion before your psychologist unfortunately gives you months or years worth of the wrong treatment for an unrelated disorder. Sadly, many mental health professionals are not highly trained in ERP so you have to go to one who is specifically trained in Ocd.

OneDayAtATimee

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 5w ago

@OneDayAtATimee I once spoke to a depression therapist (outside of NOCD) who claimed she was also trained in OCD, but she still questioned why I was doing exposure therapy?? 😂 She said my (very simple) exposures sounded like “torture” and didn’t understand the point of them. But exposures are the way to recover from Ocd lol. So I had to quit being her client

bmaria

Date posted: 5w ago

@OneDayAtATimee That’s the thing she is an ocd specialist and trained in erp. She told me real event ocd isn’t a real thing

OneDayAtATimee

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 5w ago

@bmaria Oh that’s super duper strange, that’s a big red flag that she said that :O NOCD has several videos and articles about Real event OCD. Sorry you have to deal with this :(

bmaria

Date posted: 5w ago

@OneDayAtATimee Isn’t it true real event ocd is about fake thoughts thinking about things you didn’t do in an event. Not necessarily about a betrayal your boyfriend has done

OneDayAtATimee

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 5w ago

@bmaria No, there’s not only one category of intrusive thoughts you’re allowed to have to qualify for real event Ocd. Real event Ocd is just a broad term and applies to any real events that have happened. For example, say a woman’s husband cheated on her (real event). Her OCD can give her intrusive thoughts and cause her to obsess over “does this mean I’m not a good partner, will he cheat again in the future, what exactly happened when he cheated on me, is he the right partner for me if he broke my boundaries, etc.” False memory Ocd is more about things you imagined that happened, but didn’t actually happen. But these are just broad categories and aren’t meant to be strict, as ppl can have sooooo many intrusive thoughts and scenarios that have happened in life- so it’s impossible to have a named theme that relates to everything. But it’s still OCD 🙏 If you have repetitive intrusive thoughts, urges, compulsions, and compulsions that go with them- you have OCD

OneDayAtATimee

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 5w ago

@OneDayAtATimee It sounds like your psychologist is overcomplicating it and saying that to qualify for OCD- your thoughts must be totally false, which is incorrect info. 1. No one has magical powers to tell with certainty that every intrusive thought you have is false. We’re human 😄 2. Sometimes our intrusive thoughts are in fact true- your partner may not be right for you, you might get a disease, a loved one might die, etc. Bad things happen in life! The only thing that matters is your obsessions and compulsions- which qualifies you for OCD

521mullax

Date posted: 5w ago

It is….. You are happily in the relationship and you have a thought. “What if I don’t love my partner” is different to “I don’t love my partner” even thought it is a feeling is is based off of facts because of your objective truths. However….. if you are in a healthy relationship and it is both what you want but have thoughts that are intrusive. Then yes that be OCD. But if you where in a relationship and values or not enjoying the company was off and you where unhappy then that is a different thing.

bmaria

Date posted: 5w ago

@521mullax I wasn’t happy in the relationship because of these issues I have been spinning on for months. They were broken boundaries and a feeling of betrayal. But I do love him a lot he has so many qualities I want in someone besides these 2 things I just can’t drop and then it makes me question am I in love or am I settling and it causes me severe anxiety all day long even when I’m with him

521mullax

Date posted: 5w ago

@bmaria Is he respectful and respectful of your needs/wants and values? Because if he kissed someone before you two were talking and it wasn’t official then I get that is nothing to do with you but to obsess about it is yeah hard. But if he isn’t respecting you or your relationship then yes that would not be classed as OCD. But the fact you are obsessing and trying to find certainty is a symptom

bmaria

Date posted: 5w ago

@521mullax I felt we were exclusive he didn’t . He said I love you the night before he kissed someone else at a bachelor party . He asked me out officially a week later. but I didn’t ask any questions about the bachelor party until 6 months into our official relationship and now I feel betrayed . He said it was a meaningless dumb kiss that meant nothing and a stupid thing but he just thought I would be possibly doing the same since we were official and he had “official vs unofficial” mindset . He is very respectful and admitted this to me which shows he can be honest but idk. And the types of women I asked him if thought they were attractive freak me out bc I think it’s disgusting but he does not so I dwell on that also

521mullax

Date posted: 5w ago

@bmaria So really it is down to a choice and communication and being honest.

bmaria

Date posted: 5w ago

@521mullax If I am treated for rocd with erp but I don’t have rocd would that be forcing myself to stay in this relationship ?

521mullax

Date posted: 5w ago

@bmaria I wouldn’t say you are forcing yourself. You are choosing if anything are you not?

521mullax

Date posted: 5w ago

@bmaria You have the choice to leave a relationship anytime you want.

____Anonymou...

Date posted: 5w ago

Well this post is gonna drive me crazy

cows12465

Date posted: 19w ago

please help me

can someone with this theme help me i’m so scared and i can’t stop having panic attacks is this OCD??? So i always have struggled most with sucicidal ocd and harm ocd. i never really had any other themes. but recently ive struggled with SOOCD. My whole life i have never EVER been into girls ever and i could never even think of ever being with a girl in my entire life. i’m having extreme amounts of anxiety and i have compulsions to make sure i look at a girl and don’t feel anything towards them or anything. My mind is literally going “what if your just in denial” or “what if you’ve just been hiding it all these years” When i know i haven’t. i have all of the symptoms of SOOCD and i still know that im not gay,but these thoughts are extremely distressing and have been the worse to deal with. I’m constantly panicking and doing compulsions to get these thoughts to leave and they won’t. i’m scared and these thoughts are making my mind scared. What if i’m going against my morals and i’m lying to myself like and i just went through a tough breakup too so that is shooting these thoughts and anxiety. Please help omg!!!

allyocd

Date posted: 15w ago

can SO-OCD do this?

im having a unusually hard flare up for two months. ive never had it this bad before (ive had this on and off for many years - thank god not constantly.) lately, i keep having these images in my head and scenarios in my head of me "coming out" in the future and ending my relationship with my amazing fiance who i love dearly. he knows everything but i still feel like i am constantly lying to him, my family, and friends. i need to know that this is something the SO-OCD can do to you? the weird thing is, is that i have never been attracted to woman. i do admire their beauty and wish to LOOK like them or have a specific feature they have, but i dont have any urges to like be with them yet i am dealing with this really bad flare up. My brain keeps telling me that since i have never tried it, i would never know, and i am just getting really distressed from it. i just want to be happy again and it seems impossible. I am convinced i am only person that is using SO-OCD as an excuse. Any guidance or advice, or anything really, will help. i just feel alone and scared and sad all the time.

Sexual Orientation OCD

Ellie.

Date posted: 13w ago

I’m begging ANYONE help I can’t take it anymore!!

I feel awful that I keep coming on here whenever I’m down bad but oh my gosh OCD is the most painful shit that I have EVER experienced in my life and I have a physical chronic illness…. I hate to say it but I hate living right now it’s too painful… im crying as I type to the point where my stomach is hurting, I have pretty severe ocd I do have generalized anxiety and idk if that is connected with ocd but because of that I have most of the subtypes REAL EVENT OCD,POCD,ZOCD,ROCD,SOCD HARM OCD, you name it and I got it!!! a lot of also why I have have those theme is trauma growing up and involving those things^ as of right now i’m 25 and a women with the most loving boyfriend in the entire world before my ocd hit me I NEVER questioned my love and care and attraction with the love of my life I always knew I was going to marry and be with this person the rest of my life! Now with ocd it confuses me soooo much and now I think I’m gay and didn’t realize or indenial and listen I get it “don’t look for reassurance!” “It’s not the thing ocd is attacking that is the problem ocd is the actual problem!” Here’s the thing with that if I’m in a relationship and I’m gay that would mean I would have to leave that said relationship and to say that “oh yeah that stuff happens and you’ll move on” is absolutely devastating to me this is THE LOVE OF MY LIFE and your telling me that iv been lying to myself this whole time or that I didn’t realize?!?!? And that sexuality can change (even though some say it can’t google says otherwise and some people have said it can’t idek anymore) and all this other BULLSHIT I can’t take it WHY?!?! why does this have to happen why can’t I just be with my love the rest of my life?!? and yes before anyone says anything I have been attracted to girls more so when I was younger watching lesbian porn liking the body’s and fantazing them sexually it stopped when I got older but I still don’t get disgusted with women who are pretty it just makes me uncomfortable because I’m with the love of my life and before I remember talking to my partner and discussing certain childhood things I experienced and we discussed that we both could be a little bi and for certain I’m (demi sexual so I don’t even really care about looks) and I truly didn’t care!! NOW I do care even with being bi because again I don’t like thinking about anyone else but my partner but I do also know my parents are homophobic and I do think about if I am gay they wouldn’t be okay with that and I also dont want to deal with that so now I sound like in indenial right?!???? I didn’t even care about labels before my ocd it just didn’t matter but now it’s effected my sex life and it’s hard for me to enjoy sex with being so confused I’m so confused I googled everything can you still have sexual fantasies with same gender but still be straight? Can you fantasize about same gender or imagine marrying them all of it !!! And non of that disgusts me it just makes me uncomfortable AGIAN only bc I just love the partner I’m with right now!!! I’m so fucking confused do I have to leave my partner and accept that I’m gay is that going to happen in the future if I get better with ocd and find out it’s been true all along?!???

Relationship OCD

Be a part of the largest OCD Community

Share your thoughts so the Community can respond

Rocd?

Related posts

Be a part of the largest OCD Community

Be a part of the largest OCD Community