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I had similar worries in the past, think that having a need for validation or attention is not necessarily NPD, i think that comes when you already have too much difficulty on being self-aware, and you hurt and trample people indiscriminately, even intentionally, simply because you feel like you are entitled to it, there are other issues such as BPD that also have an excessive need for attention due to fear of abandonment, the reason NPD has the reputation it does and the difference with other issues is because it's hard for someone like that to seek help or even think they need it in the first place. I would be surprised if you had harm/morality OCD and NPD at the same time, i also doubt like you sometimes about my character or if i lack empathy because of things from my past or behaviors, I have also been very much about seeking attention, but i also recognize that i have the neurotic component, i'm very self-aware and although i have done things that i deeply regret the things in my head are more focused on self-deprecation and the anxiety, It's true that I've read things that have caused me stress, such as the case of vulnerable or covert NPD, where one says: "Oh no, maybe that's who i am." But i doubt very much that even they would be so bothered at an OCD level by the possibility of being one, i mean, the core definition of narcissists is that they don't have that level of self-awareness or conflict about how they are, no matter how they present themselves.

I cannot explain how much I understand… I have been trapped in the most horrific OCD loop for literally four years now after my psyche nearly collapsed from someone telling me that I’m a narcissist, and everyone in my life secretly hates me. My most recent Therapist said definitively many times that I’m definitely not and I kept arguing that there’s truth to it. The guy who did this four years ago, Max, some describe him as a narcissist, and say that he launched a smear campaign on me. I could explain way more about this if this is interesting or helpful to you, let me know. 🩷