The day OCD shattered my entire existence

“I just remember my entire existence shattering,” Dierdre Rae recalls, looking back on the day when OCD nearly broke her. She saw the very thing she had avoided for months, and instantly, panic took over. OCD made her believe she had lost everything. She would never see her family again, never be okay again. That night, she had another panic attack—one that landed her in a hospital. But that rock-bottom moment became a turning point. It led Dierdre to discover exposure and response prevention (ERP) therapy—the one treatment that finally worked. ERP helped her understand her OCD, confront her fears, and take back control. Looking back, Dierdre sees how much she was struggling up to that point—and just how much she gained by getting the right kind of help. At her lowest, she couldn’t imagine a future beyond OCD’s suffering, let alone the life she has today: a life where she can travel the world, make new friends, and actually enjoy being alive. Watch Dierdre Rae open up about the day OCD shattered her world—and what life is like on the other side of OCD’s hardest moments.

Crook

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 21w

I watched this. It was extremely powerful.

Mackenzie - ...

Date posted: 20w

@Anonymous57 So glad to hear that you enjoyed this video!

Mon7

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 20w

I was crying watching this. 😥

Anonymous

Date posted: 21w

I agree. Made me want to cry a little, so glad she is doing better.

HRG

Date posted: 20w

@Anonymous How do you answer anonymously

Anonymous

Date posted: 20w

@gracefuleducator Not sure. But you can ask the Member Advocates and they get right back to you pretty quickly. Possibly not right now as it is the weekend but I have had excellent assistance with them during the week.

hs91234

Date posted: 20w

Really powerful stuff. Realizing you've never really been mentally well is like a punch in the gut. Glad she's on the mend.

Anonymous

Date posted: 17w

I’m a recovering alcoholic. I’ve been sober for some time now and have discovered I’ve had OCD for most of my life and sexual assault to myself in the past that was scary. A lot of the situations I was in was because of my addiction. Floating in and out of consciousness. Well, about 7-8 years ago I came home drunk and my girlfriend was sleeping. I got into bed with her and she said I fingered her even after she told me stop and tried to get my hand out. I then passed out with my hand in her pants… I had no idea what exactly (I knew I probably fucked something up) I did until she told me when I sobered up. I have hated myself every day for this. I would do such unhinged and terrible things when I was in addiction. I don’t know how to move past this. And it’s consuming all of me now. I feel extremely guilty about it and am depressed and know I should be locked up. This is really frustrating because I love people and don’t want to hurt anyone. That’s why I’ve stayed sober.

kimbuca11

Date posted: 20w

Are you on medication?

Be a part of the largest OCD Community

Share your thoughts so the Community can respond