- User type
- Staff
- Date posted
- 20w
I believed I was a monster: My battle with taboo intrusive thoughts
At age eight, Chrissie Hodges' mind became a prison of terrifying intrusive thoughts she couldn't speak aloud—thoughts about harm and other topics that society tends to react to with disgust. Growing up in a traditional household with no understanding of mental health, she had nowhere to turn and no idea what was happening to her. She spent years fearing she was broken beyond repair—even though her intrusive thoughts contradicted everything she valued. The physical sensations that came with these thoughts only reinforced her fear. The turning point in Chrissie’s story was finding out that she wasn’t alone—others had the same exact thoughts as she did. She finally understood that these thoughts weren't indicative of her character; they were symptoms of OCD, attacking what she valued most. That revelation allowed her to finally reach out for help and start regaining her life. We recently sat down with Chrissie, now a mental health advocate and founder of the nonprofit OCD Gamechangers, for a powerful conversation about her story, and about breaking the cycle of shame that surrounds taboo OCD themes. Read about how Chrissie took her life back after years of suffering, and how speaking openly about taboo thoughts can free people from shame and isolation.