S-so uhm my bf (?) and I have been a little distant and his spotify yesterday was the same where it says that he's my future husband, and today, it was changed. L-like, i-is he g-go-gonna break up with me??? I'm so scared I'm nauseous and I don't want this stress to cause another seizure, but also kinda don't care at the same time because it would ha-have to be my fault??
I understand what you are saying ,the point I'm making is nothing in life is certain, example God forbid this happens , you'll get married and somewhere down the line you'll get divorced for some reason,can you tell me you have or had absolute certainty he won't leave you,the bottom line is in order to break free from ocd and the core feature of treatment is accepting uncertainty, otherwise you will be stuck on ocd for I don't know how long,there is always a % that our fear x can happen, if you are seeing a therapist he or she will explain and guide you through this ,I hope you understand what I am saying
I do
I know he g-gets i-i-irri-t-tated with me sometimes a-and maybe I'm o-over-r-rea-acting but I-- I can't lo-lose anyone else. I can't b-be le-let down again
Deep breaths, calm yourself down, be present where you are. You'll be ok.
@Someone99 - B-bu-but I-- This isn't okay, I have to have h-hurt him in so-some w-way
i really have no expertise in this realm at all but im so sorry that this is stressing you out! at present, id just say don't judge yourself too harshly or draw a conclusion without all the facts. you don't know for sure that it's because of you that it's changed. it doesn't have to be because you've hurt him or you've done something bad. you don't know that for sure. i'd say maybe sit with it for a while til you feel calmer and wait for him to approach you about anything if he has a concern. don't pin yourself with the blame when you don't know that it's your fault or it's because of something you've done. (sorry if im not making sense. but please be kind to yourself <3)
This actually helped so much, thank you. <3
Accept uncertainty, he may or may not break up with you .cause you will never satisfy your ocd with 100% certainty
The thing is I CAN'T lose him.
I understand but you have no certainty he won't leave you
He told me he wouldn't, w-we're gonna get married, so he can't
I was in this game with this person and I noticed his voice was deep, and his avatar looked attractive to me?? and my brain was like āhis voice is so??? And his avatar kinda fine tooā like omg, shut up, Iām not taken yet but I still want to be in this relationship with this other guy, I feel like thereās nothing I can do and Iāll always be a cheater, I donāt even know how I feel, like do I actually want to cheat??? And it freaks me out because I donāt even know how I feel? Because sometimes Iāll get a feeling that agrees with it, like Iāll have that feeling that wants me to date them and then Iāll hear something like āyeah I wouldā / āyeah I agree with thatā ,, now I feel like Iāll be a cheater and Iām really scared, I would NEVER cheat, nor would I trade this boy for anything, but I canāt do it. I just need to know what to do.
Does anyone else with SO-OCD struggle with imagining a future partner and checking feelings? Thatās been my biggest compulsion, and now I feel like I donāt want to end up with a man someday, or that if I do Iāll feel sad or lonely. Iām also sitting here imagining being with women and I canāt tell if I like the sexual thoughts or not anymore, or if my negative reactions mean anything. My face scrunches and I feel anxious and my temperature rises. Iāve been off this app for a couple weeks but still feeling anxiety pretty steadily. I keep imagining the future and getting this feeling and voice that Iām gay and I need to come out to everyone. Itās distressing and I donāt feel like myself anymore
Iāve been trying my best with ERP and just everything thatās going on. I have severe OCD, GAD, PMDD, panic disorder, recently diagnosed ADHD, and currently experiencing a major depressive episode. Apparently. I was taking a break from this app but I really need support right now. My family is honestly really mean and not understanding of what Iām going through. Right now itās gotten bad to the point I had to withdrawal from my last semester of university. My only support is my boyfriend and heās now planning to join the military. I wonāt be able to talk to him for 3 months and I feel really scared of being alone with all of this. I know I shouldnāt depend on him to begin with but right now Iām at an extremely low point and I feel like I wonāt make it alone. There hasnāt been a single day we havenāt texted and talked in 4 years. I feel really scared, but I donāt want to hold him back. You guys, I feel so sad and terrified right now. I donāt want him to go, heās all I have.
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