Anyone else accidentally short circuit their pain receptors by trying to imagine solving the problem when you're in pain without actually solving it and then get hooked on the temporary relief? How the hell do I break this habit. Its lovely, but unhealthy
That’s a powerful ability! May I ask are you someone who deals with chronic pain? And is the imagining and getting that temporary relief preventing you from “solving” the issue/getting actual relief? Or are there other barriers to relief you deal with as well? I’ve found our brains don’t really come up with these types of “solutions” without a good reason.
I am but I am also anxiety ridden so I deal with hypochondriac tendencies as well. I try my best to deal with that honestly so its difficult to tell whats anxiety and what's real pain sometimes because I'm actually tolerant not intolerant of pain and I tend to lean toward rapid problem solving.
Which leads to this weird complex where I'm questioning if I'm in pain when I know damn well I could feel worse
@Anonymous So I’m kind of hearing several issues at play- the pain itself, this particular coping mechanism for the pain that you feel is maladaptive/not helpful, and then your kind of hyper-awareness/critical kind of watchful eye of whether the pain is actually even real or not. That sounds like a lot to be dealing with all at once ♥️
@Anonymous And I’m sure it compounds/is all wrapped up in your existing issues with anxiety. As a kind of baseline fact about pain- we don’t actually experience any pain in the body, it’s entirely a construct of the brain, the body itself doesn’t actually “feel” anything. And the thing about psychogenic (aka psychosomatic) pain is that it’s often felt very similarly but the signals instead of coming from the body are just coming from the brain itself originating with issues like chronic anxiety and depression. Which are very much very real issues no different from a physical ailment. And I get that knowing the source and knowing if it’s a structural issue or a psychological one is an important thing to know, but I think dismissing some pain as “real” and other pain as “fake” is maybe not as helpful as simply noticing and feeling and sitting with it as long as you can.
@Anonymous Also on another note stress coming from anxiety and other psychological issues produces chemicals like cortisol which very literally causes all kinds of inflammation in the body which does lead to structural pain. I think it would be a lot more helpful to try to have some empathy for both your body and your brain and just sit with yourself and kind of say like wow yeah this is really hard and really difficult and hurts a lot and regardless of what it’s from I deserve care. Because you do and I’m so sorry you’re dealing with all this ♥️ idk if this was helpful at all but I hope you get some relief one way or another
@E1990 That- is actually wonderfully helpful advice. I agree. I tend to avoid "sitting with" the pain. It makes me feel extremely uncomfortable (I am a bit prideful in showing it, which is where the hypochondriac started, I wasn't being taken seriously so I thought I had to display it. Fatal mistake in case anyone is going through that now, just inform the doctor of how you've been problem solving, if you're in real pain they tend to give you a crucial look over because of their experiences but are more often than not still compassionate in their hearts) I digress. Yes. Sitting with pain. Thank you! I will have to put this into practice.
I think I get embarrassed bc I have to hold my body in weird unflattering ways and (trigger warning) I was hurt as a child, so it makes ME feel like a creep or weirdo(need better language for this) to sit, say, with my legs splayed, or too much fatigue where I'm falling asleep on my feet. People have commented I look drunk and that makes me feel lazy and out of control. So I fight it harder, which only makes me more exhausted. Come to think of it, is this what all people with pain go through I wonder?
Does anyone else feel like their safety mechanism is to avoid bad/painful feelings? I am so deeply rooted in this habit and I’m having a very tough time breaking it to create healthier actions. I feel like I am stuck in a repetitive cycle and I always have so many intentions to be better, but consistent failure makes me and my partner feel insane. I always want things to feel good, I’m terrible about having difficult conversations about painful topics, even when I know that they’re important to have and could facilitate deeper bonding feelings afterwards. For example, my partner and I are struggling right now due to cheating mistakes I have made and my R/SOCD. I have all of these intentions to be a more supportive partner and help him through some of his pain. Understanding my ocd and seeking help was only a small part of that, it can’t erase what’s been done. Even when things feel good, I know he is constantly fighting off a lot of mental anguish that I have caused him. Still, I will let things feel good without saying/acknowledging anything. I know that it’s a good thing to have good moments together amidst working through bad, but it’s more detrimental for it all to feel like avoidance. I have a hard time giving him the support I want to because I feel so inadequate at having hard conversations. I worry so much about not being able to effectively communicate my feelings after I ask about something and then it will make the situation worse. I know this is all a false reality/ worst case scenario my brain is creating, but it is still so hard to catch and overcome. I can genuinely convince myself it’s not necessary. Because of this, he has serious doubts that nothing will ever change and he won’t receive the support through challenging times that he needs in a partner. Has anyone gone through this and figured out how to change? Seeking some advice/tips/encouragement. Thank you.
Has anyone had success “faking it until you make it” with discomfort? I’m having compulsions to check all my passwords and accounts and logging into every website I can recall from grocery shopping to tv subscriptions etc and coming up with all these insane scenarios that something’s not right and I’ve forgotten something I’ve done wrong and don’t know if I have or haven’t and if I can’t find the answers then my life is ruined and it’s stolen 4 months of my life. I’m exhausted. I am choosing to just stop and I am around family today and feeling like I’m dying insane. Has anyone had success faking it until you make it with compulsions? I’m really battling real event and false memory here and the lines are so blurred. I need help, my family can’t take my reassurance seeking anymore and I’m at my breaking point with feeling alone. I’ve lost every person I trust in this battles support for now. I know they love me but they can’t take it and I’m really down today and the compulsions and obsessive thoughts aren’t stopping and I don’t know how to just be in everyday life right now when my mind is so loud.
i am nearly constantly extremely anxious and i don't want to live like this. my family and friends are so done dealing with me to the point that i feel that i'd be better off completely alone. every small twinge or pain in my body sends me into a panic, and if it's not that it's something else i manage to be worrying over. i'm fairly certain my stress has caused an ulcer to form. i try to sit with myself and not seek reassurance/check myself for issues but it is genuinely agonizing at times. most days i sleep 12-14 hours a day because it gets to a point that i cannot deal with it anymore and i take something to sleep. sometimes i do feel that i would be better off just not around so i wouldn't have to feel this any longer. i do a lot of unhealthy things to cope (drinking, smoking, and otc sleeping pills being the main culprits) and those habits end up hurting me in the long run and making me more anxious. i do have a counselor and she is great but i'm having a really hard time finding a medication provider under my insurance. i really really do want to get better because this is the most miserable i have ever been and i hate being like this and exhausting myself and the people around me. i've been told a big part of the healing process is to make yourself sit with your thoughts and deal with the uncertainty and fear as it comes, but it feels torturous to do that. sometimes reading through these posts does make me feel better knowing that i'm not alone but lately i have been unable to pull myself out of this frantic state. what are some healthier ways to cope/distract yourself that you guys find to be at least semi-effective? i am genuinely willing to try anything to make this terrible feeling go away
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