anybody else

any of y’all feel like every single thing you say is some sort of manipulation. like you’re not genuine at all and everything you do is to get something out of something? the same with therapists too. i feel like ever since i was a kid i’ve manipulated my therapists in some way, like to look like the victim or so they’d think about me a certain way. like therapy could never help me cause i can’t tell when i’m lying or manipulating or whatever. i’ve seen someone mention something similar on here and just wanted to see what y’all thought!

littlecreek24

Date posted: 5d ago

Definitely... I go back on conversations to see if I lied as well. I'm still stuck on my last therapy appointment, all I can think about is how I was probably lying/manipulating because she was too nice to me.

Rayanswaid

Date posted: 5d ago

Yes, I’ve felt this so deeply — like I was just a master manipulator in disguise, even in therapy. For the longest time I believed I was somehow performing vulnerability, not actually feeling it. But then I realized: the very fact that I was questioning my intentions this much meant I wasn’t trying to manipulate — I was trying to understand myself. People who lie or manipulate don’t sit there worrying for hours if they might be lying. You’re not a bad person for doubting. You’re a hurting one trying to be real. That’s more than enough.

goosewithocd

Date posted: 4d ago

Yes, for sure. It's like a paranoia that I'm actually a really selfish person who only acts out of self interest. How can I be sure I'm not just acting to present a specific image of myself to others? My therapist always says how I'm high achieving and anxious, which makes me doubt myself, buy what if I'm just trying to project this like "goodie two shoes" image to others for my own gratification.... and I'm actually like manipulative and sociopathic...

issphra 🫶🏻

Date posted: 4d ago

Constantly, my whole life. It’s even worse now, but nothing feels genuine :/

Anamarie DeM...

Date posted: 4d ago

Very interested in the study for many reasons.Thank you and GOD BLESS.

kelsey46

Date posted: 24w ago

Does anyone have narcissism OCD?

I am really scared of being a narcissist.. I’ve been in therapy and I feel like my therapist isn’t taking it seriously:( like if I am a narcissist I want to work on it I’m just really scared of harming people.. including my partner:( I don’t want be the reason he needs therapy and I don’t want to ruin his life. I’m scared I’m manipulating him somehow to want to be with me and I just don’t know what to do. I NEED to get this fixed before our relationship progresses but I just feel like I’m not being heard by therapists/psychiatrists We want to get married and have children but I don’t even know if I will be a good partner or mom. If I do have narcissism I just think it would be best if I left him alone :( I don’t know what to do I know that people will say that narcissists don’t care about hurting other people or things like that but I just don’t know how true that is. I also have really mean judgmental, cruel, and hateful thoughts about people and I feel like that means I’m a narcissist

Unknown1738

Date posted: 23w ago

Horrible person OCD

I’ve said and done so many hurtful things growing up, especially in elementary and middle school. I was very passive aggressive and mean for a majority of my life, and I’ve hurt peoples feelings. I’m no longer like that now, but every single thing I’ve ever done wrong replays in my head constantly, from the moment I wake up to the second I go to sleep. I know I deserve to feel the chronic guilt and shame, so I feel even more guilty pitying myself. It’s eating me alive, I’m so scared. I know people must hate me, and they have every right to. feel like I don’t deserve to have moments of happiness because I’ve taken that ability away from someone before. I’m not diagnosed, but this has been going on for years and I’m scared to talk to anyone about it because I fear they would look at me differently knowing I’ve hurt someone’s feelings. I feel like a monster. It’s ruining my life and I don’t know what to do.

issphra 🫶🏻

Date posted: 23w ago

Do you ever just feel like a bad person?

Does anyone else experience this lingering fear and anxiety because they think they’re capable of hurting someone? It’s killing me. I feel like I’m such a danger. I feel like I’m a predator. I feel like this awful person and I can’t shake it. I want to carry on with my day but I can’t. I don’t feel like I deserve it. I feel like I’ve done awful things. I can’t stop crying.

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