ROCD Christian

@Cade Lott. Do you ever struggle with physical appearances ? Like I love my boyfriend but I wish he was more physically attractive. I plan to marry him and I feel like I’m settling if I don’t find someone that’s more attractive physically. God has given me everything I could want in a man in him and I just fell in love with who he is. But I let these things bug me

@Viny Definitely

@EmmaGrace27 - so feel free to tell me what's bothering you :)

@Viny Just feel bad that there are things about my boyfriend that bug me. I love him he’s the perfect man for me like Christian, man of God absolute saint. Can make me laugh like no other, and he and I both feel led to one another don’t feel led away. I don’t wanna value looks over who he is I fell for who he is and when we met had no physically attraction. I do now but it’s not a LOT, I over analyze his stomach and what it looks like. I feel bad bc i feel like it means I can’t be with him. I wanna be with him I’m scared in settling for less than what I want which is an attractive guy, but also I wanna be okay with how he looks. It’s wrong to go look for a better looking guy when Gid has given me whah I have! Not judge by looks but by th heart I feel bad when I don’t have that attraction and I compare

@EmmaGrace27 I’m in the same situation as yourself. When I first met my bf he was not my “type” but over time I’ve grown closer to him however I do sometimes get these intrusive thoughts he is not good looking enough as bad as that sounds and when others that are close to me say the same it hurts even more. God has blessed me with him and he literally is everything I could ask for just the looks part keeps throwing me off. When I get these thoughts I tend to go and distract myself and just let myself know it’s just a thought what I feel for him is something more. But then I do feel like a horrible person for thinking like that because he is an amazing guy. There’s been many times I have thought about breaking up but I know that will not solve anything other than give me temporary relief.

@EmmaGrace27 - I understand, OCD is a tricky trickster (pun intended) It corrolates things that don't have real value in real life, and goes against who you are as a person and what you value. That being said, sounds to me it is trying to convince you that a characteristic of your boyfriend is a deal breaker. And you should absolutely like 100% everything about your partner. but relationships in reality are not like this. It's okay to dislike somethings about your partner, a relationship does come with the challenge of accepting and managing shortcomings too.

@Anonymous Also OCD will try to convince you that people should fit a mold of "your type" and this isn't true. People never will fit perfectly into anyone's archetypes. And that's okay

@Viny Thank you I appreciate it a lot

@EmmaGrace27 - if you ever need to talk, by all means I'm here to do so.

@Viny I appreciate it so much! I really do. I think it’s ok to accept the things maybe I don’t like as much, as say yea my attraction CAN grow. I’m definitely physically attracted but I nit pick at what I don’t like and I truly just wanna accept it and learn to love it. God sees him as he sees me which isn’t by looks but by the heart

@Viny I think what’s really hard is I think I’d be happier with someone else only based on looks and idk how to like get past it

@EmmaGrace27 I have a connection with Josh that I’ve never had with anyone else