it’s getting worse for me

i’ve already posted about this before but i keep thinking about it. i was sitting next to a dog and it was laying on its back laying face away from me. i kept getting intrusive thoughts about touching the dog inappropriately. and i was petting the dog to prove to myself that i wouldn’t. i remember i was leaning on the dog. then he kicked me with his back legs three times. i also was rotating my shoulder cause it pops and cracks when i do and i was trying to relieve it. i think i touched the dog and on purpose too, because thoughts were going through my head. after the dog kicked me i sat there for a second just pure panic and i ran to the bathroom, just crying non stop. i dont think i deserve to cry tho. i think my life is a over. the more i try to remember the more scary thoughts of what could’ve happened pop up. i’m just in denial and i want to be sent to a mental hospital.

sanshine

Date posted: 13w

Ur not a bad person. It was intrusive thoughts. And it disturbed you.

Tea and Honey

Date posted: 13w

This is just OCD. That is all it is. This is how OCD works. You can learn to ignore all this. I have had things like this happen to me. It was something about the OCD and me not preventing the baby (who was sitting) from falling forward, etc, etc. The OCD thoughts and urges blend into these little involuntary movements. This is normal. I had been so afraid of flipping God off that I was worried about raising my middle finger. But one day I had an emotional stage of anger along with an urge to raise my finger. I just couldn’t help it; I felt overwhelmed, and I did raise my finger. I felt so bad. But you know what? It all wasn’t real! It was just OCD. It didn’t mean anything! The same is true with you. I want you to take a new perspective on life: If something is OCD, then it is MEANINGLESS and you are going to ignore it and go with your life. This whole thing with the dog is just OCD. Therefore, it is meaningless. Your job now is to Go on with life (even though you may still FEEL upset). Practice moving on (despite the upset feelings). In time, you will feel better. And remember, the more you practice moving on from the OCD, the more you conquer the OCD. You can do this!!! 💙😀

Anonymous

Date posted: 13w

Hi there! This is my first post on this platform but your story is what I've been dealing with myself. I had no idea that these thoughts and my obsession to make meaning of it, was OCD. Once I realized it was, there was some freedom in that. I felt less alone because others are also dealing with this. I too have intrusive thoughts about my dog. It's so incredibly difficult to talk to people about this so I'm proud of you for talking about it. Have you started ERP therapy by chance? I'm going on week 4 and I will say it's been intense, but useful and beneficial. When we have these thoughts, our first reaction is to reassure ourselves that we would never do this or never do that. I didn't realize that this was a compulsion until I talked with a professional. I just want you to know that you're not alone and this intrusive thought, specifically, isn't new. That others have this too. You got this!!!

averydayimsh...

Date posted: 13w

@Anonymous i haven’t got therapy for it at all, my moms working on it though. i think i really need it, it’s getting worse dealing with it on my own.

Anonymous

Date posted: 13w

@averydayimshuffling Well, this is the first step! Acknowledging it and talking about it is so important. We don't have to live like this. We are not destined to be miserable. ERP therapy can be scary at first but trust the process. You need to make sure you see an OCD specialist and not just one who does cognitive behavioral therapy. You got this! You're not alone and there is help out there.

thissuckbad

Date posted: 13w

If this was something you really wanted to do you wouldn’t feel so terrible about it , it’s okay

gio

Date posted: 25w

So so guilty

I don’t know why but today I feel so incredibly angry right now and I was so frustrated with everything including my two dogs. I didn’t hurt them or hit them or anything but I was particularly annoyed and angry when they were trying to get presumably a bunny or a raccoon from underneath the shed, so I had to pull my small dog away when he wouldn’t budge away from the shed and i couldn’t pick him up because I was not close enough. I feel bad because I know I love my dogs but oh my god I just get so annoyed with them and on top of them everything else I have to just shut down all day and the things I don’t understand. I feel like I’m going insane. I don’t want my dogs to think I don’t love them because i was angry and annoyed at them. I know they’re just animals and they love me and I love them. I want them to know I’m sorry for even getting mad. I wish I didn’t feel so angry and yet so disconnected at the same time. I’m terrified I’m an evil person or that I don’t love my pets or something. I started to hit myself and punch myself because I do that when I get over the edge angry. I don’t know why I feel angry. It’s a mix of anger and emptiness and I don’t want either of them especially towards my dogs.

garebear423

Date posted: 20w

Tw: beastility, sexual assault

I'm worried that I sexual assulted or r*ped my dog when I was 17 and I'm 18 now. This memory, has came up multiple and changes rapidly, it says that I was also saying very disturbing things to the dog, calling her good and weird disgusting things like that. I don't know if I can live with myself if this is true.

Astjtoju13!

Date posted: 20w

Harm ocd

Someone please help me I’m having intrusive thoughts of hurting my pets and I’m really scared of myself and I want these thoughts to go away. Can someone please help me I’m scared and I don’t know if I’m a monster

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it’s getting worse for me

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