If your mind purposely keeps fetching a repetitive word, and you’re afraid it will never go away, is the ERP therapy to STOP the mind from doing it? Or ALLOW the mind to do it, and not react? Also, is repeating a word in your head a mental compulsion? Or would that be the obsession? So then what’s the compulsion? Posting on here? Lol
It's a mental compulsion. I can understand your confusion, though, considering that your fear that you will do this forever comes across as an obsession in and of itself. I used to do this - it was a manifestation of "Just Right" OCD in my case. I would repeat certain words over and over again in my head to make sure they still felt right. For me, ERP would have consisted of resisting the compulsion to repeat the word, as I was distressed by the thought of not being able to do that. It seems to be the opposite for you, however. How do you generally react? Do you try to stop repeating words, or do you lean into it? That will influence what exposures would work best for you. Your manifestation of this theme reminds me of the hyperawareness that many people with somatic OCD deal with, including the fear that they will never stop being hyperaware of certain physical processes. Based off of these similarities, I believe that ERP for you could consist of voluntarily repeating certain words and allowing in the fear that you generally experience without trying to escape it. However, that only holds true if you usually DO try to stop this compulsion in its tracks.
@Kai S. When trying to sleep, I definitely do my best to wipe it away. During the day, my mind will sorta “fetch it” to see if it will bug me, and of course it does. If it doesn’t, it will try another word. Whichever one gets the most reaction, is the one that sticks. This is not like a song playing in your head on autopilot, more like an annoying game that I don’t want to play, but something makes me do it anyway. Thank you Kai PS Somatic OCD is my main form of OCD - Blinking, swallowing, breathing, yawning For 15+ years off & on Blinking is the day game Swallowing, breathing, yawning all for night. And the repetitive word game will get introduced during the day, and then saved later for night. When I try to sleep UGHHH 😝
The ERP is to allow the word and to not do compulsions. ( anything you would normally do to relieve the anxiety). Repeating the word in your head is an obsession (intrusive thought) if its something you do not want to be doing. Repeating the word in your head is a compulsion if it is something you are doing to relieve anxiety. Obsession( the thing that causes the anxiety) compulsion ( the thing you do to make the anxiety go away). ERP ( exposure and response (compulsion) prevention) So if this word is annoying you, you let your mind have a field day with it. ITs like when you say any word, pick a random word, now say it 100 times in a row. around number 25-30 the word kinda stops making sense. That is what you will train your brain to do by allowing it to basically exhaust itself and make that word go from anxiety causing to meaningless non-sense that is easily dismissable.
I haven’t started ERP yet. But just curious from others who have, How do you sit with compulsions when they’re mental compulsions? Or just “let them pass”? It seems it’s going to be impossible since none of my compulsions are physical/tangible 😓
should i be doing erp instead of repeating again and again "none of that shits real. none of that shits real. none of that shits real" ? i can’t tell if it makes it better or not
I'm thinking of trying some ERP on my own while I wait for treatment, but I'm having some trouble knowing what is a compulsion and what would be good exposure. For example, I have huge fears of being a narcissist and/or a generally bad person. So whenever I watch a movie or read something that has an evil character in it I automatically compare myself to that character and stress over if I'm like that person. A couple of things I do when this happens is Google other people's experiences, seek reassurance, rumination, etc. Sometimes I'll also google different symptoms of narcissism, freak out over things that I relate to, then get relief over things I don't. So my confusion is, would researching people who have narcissism be an exposure, or a compulsion since it's something I sometimes do during a spiral? Or, would the exposure be watching movies/living life hearing these stories, and refraining from the spiral of rumination and no Googling at all?
Share your thoughts so the Community can respond
