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@Anonymoususer26251 I’m so sorry, that has to be so exhausting to carry all the time. I don’t blame you for feeling so exasperated and defeated. Unfortunately, the toughest and most painful part of OCD is facing these fears or obsessions head on. I can’t say I know exactly how your OCD works, because everyone’s is different, but I know how OCD in general works, and it’s the same fix for everyone with the different subtypes. We have to bite back. Make fun of your OCD, go out of your way to do exactly the opposite of what your OCD is telling you to do. This mental battle is exactly what OCD wants you to do, it wants to keep you down and keep battering you until you can’t even move. The fact that you don’t want this tells me everything about you. You are a good person struggling with the dark parts of their brain, everyone has a dark side. People with OCD just tend to try and deny that dark side a lot more. Truth is, the human mind is brutal! It’s grim, but that doesn’t mean it’s what we are.

@Anonymoususer26251 Notice how it’s not causing any real harm to anyone but yourself though! It’s an obsessive thought process that makes you feel as if you’re “basically” attempting to kill someone, when you’re not! OCD loves blurring the lines for yourself, making it seem like you’re “basically” doing that when you’re not. It’s a super excruciatingly long process, but you can get through it!

@Anonymoususer26251 Ah, I apologize! I must’ve misread that. The prayers are definitely a compulsion (even if they come from a good place/intent!) Unfortunately, OCD latches on anything that’s core to us.. religion, people, kids, whatever.. it’s a brutal disorder. Your brain tricks you, same with how our brains trick us for different subtypes! The fact that you’re experiencing all this distress and whatnot shows it’s hurting nobody but yourself.. and it sucks, but we have to sit with that uncertainty! Try weening away from praying the thoughts away, and sit with it! Once it gets too bad to bear, perform your compulsion to feel better! You can do this.. it’s just a lot of time and patience involved!

@Anonymoususer26251 There you go! You just said it yourself, you don’t want any harm coming to anyone! OCD makes you believe anything, when it’s not your true beliefs and morals. And no, attempted murder would be far more decisive than that! Again, you’d be going out of your way to hurt somebody in a significant way, you aren’t doing that! It’s all just OCD playing games, and I’m sure as you’re reading right now, it’s trying to trick the text and make you think you’re still a bad person! You’re not! We just have to sit with the uncertainty OCD brings.

@Anonymoususer26251 Wym ? Ur convinced that ur a P??