Intrusive thoughts are unwanted and cause stress which mine do but also when I’m mad I get this rage feeling and say I wanna stab someone like that feels like a. Want not intrusive why am I saying “ I wanna “ :(
It’s not a want because you will go to prison for a long time also, you feel bad about these thoughts, I was a drug addict and I had those thoughts like almost trying to force me to do it, I get thoughts like what if I actually had done it :( I’m extremely upset I don’t want to have these thoughts anymore, turns out I didn’t do it but I still get those what if thoughts. And it scares me bad.
@Love 777 Me too !
For me, it helps to connect it to something I value. So like, my Harm OCD revolved around killing my pets for a while and I’d have intense images with it. It was horrible. A big thing that helped was realizing 1) it’s a fear — not a want and 2) it’s my mind’s way of reminding me how much I CARE about my pets and how empathetic I am. So now it’s easier to address the thoughts as they come. They’re rare now, so when they do pop up it’s just quickly being like “thank you mind for reminding me I value my little family so much and that I want to be such a great caretaker.”
These are normal intrusive thoughts. Here is the KEY. 🔑 You have to remember that the THOUGHTS DON’T MEAN ANYTHING. It doesn’t matter if those thoughts are in your head or not. When the thoughts come, tell yourself, “Yay, I’m having my stabbing thoughts again. These thoughts can stay all day if they want to.” Allowing the thoughts to run freely through your head is key 🔑!! Don’t try to fight them off. Just let the thoughts run. They don’t matter.
Is it possible that you make these posts about your specific thoughts as a confessing and reassurance-seeking compulsion? That sadly is gonna continue to make your OCD worse :(
@OneDayAtATimee Idk I just wanna feel like I’m not alone and tbh reassurance is the only reason I haven’t ended it yet
This may upset some people reading so here is just a warning that these are disturbing I don’t know what to do to make the bad thoughts stop. My mom recently had a baby, my little brother. I wasn’t exactly happy about this pregnancy, but I have nothing against my brother. He’s adorable and silly. Nothing against him. But I feel like these thoughts bug me because what if deep down I do resent him because I didn’t want my mom to have another kid? What if I did act on these things because I hate him? What if I just lose it and do something? It’s all so illogical, I know. Never would I ever want to do that. But there’s times I’m watching him for a few minutes for my mom and my brain just shows me an awful scene of me brutally hurting him or killing him. Or I’ll be holding him and my brain shows me a scene where I purposefully drop him or I just hurt him so badly. I’ll be walking near him and my brain tells me I’m going to stomp on him. It shows me such bad things. I have intrusive thoughts all the time, but this is different because there’s a semi good reason I “could” do it. That being, I wasn’t happy about the pregnancy. And it scares me. I’ve started crying because I was so scared it was going to happen. I have to back up away from him or sit down so there’s no way I can do anything. I feel horrible. I don’t want to hurt him. And I’m so scared I will. But I won’t. I’m hoping this makes sense to others who struggle with this. Because to anyone else who’s never gone through these things I’ll sound insane. And sound like a psychopath. Thanks for reading. Any help would be appreciated.
I’m having a very bad evening with my intrusive thoughts. I was doing really good dealing with them but tonight one hit me hard. I’ve been having a lot of different intrusive thoughts but I’ll have one occasionally about hurting my mom or my dog who I love and they’re the only family I have in my life. They’re my world. I was helping my mom put away the dishes and I had the big kitchen knife in my hand and my intrusive thought was you could stab your mom. And then my brain said I had a twitch in my hand and that meant I wanted to do it. Let me just say that I wouldn’t hurt a fly. I actually caught a fly in a glass and put it outside instead of killing it this evening before this intrusive thought happened. I’m such a gentle and compassionate and caring person and these thoughts instantly cause me to have a panic attack. And I have no one to talk to them about. I know they’re hard for my mom to hear and I don’t want to be any more of a burden than I already am. I do desperately want to tell her and have her reassure me that I’m not crazy or a psycho. Then my thoughts wander to if your hand did flinch could you be a psychopath. Is hurting someone in you. I know it’s not but I feel like my mind is out to get me and hurt me. I’m working so hard and I thought I was doing so good but I need to know why I have these thoughts. They’re not ok. I need someone to help me make sense of why. I know we aren’t supposed to ruminate but I shouldn’t have thoughts like this about people I love and care about the most in the world.
I struggle so bad with intrusive thoughts. They can be so bad that I'll cry because I KNOW that's not how I feel or want to do. (Too embarrassed to say what they're about) I'll constantly try to figure out why I have them, and constantly figure out what they mean, causing me to constantly circle around and around. I had to get on anxeity meds, which helped a little but the thoughts still happen. How do you help yourself with this? How do you know that you're just not some physcopath? 😅
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