Boyfriend has been ghosting me for 3 days now after I told him he wasn't as affectionate and he said he was depressed. I texted him to ask if he was okay and haven't heard back, but sometimes he has bad service. That was yesterday. He has retweeted things on Twitter so I'm not sure if I should message him there. The only times we haven't really talked are when we've broken up before and this is really painful.

I agree and I know you're right. At this point I'm just wanting him to establish contact, I'm not super worried about the outcome romantically. He is someone I care about and want in my life in general. I messaged him and he's working so hopefully I'll get a response before the end of the day. At some point I will have to explain my boundaries, as this is possibly my largest trigger for depression/abandonment issues from my past. However right now I'm just trying to be compassionate and not forget to just be there for him as a person. I think he may need help and encouragement getting started with therapy, which I did support in conversation but didn't really follow up and now I'm regretting it. I hope he's receptive and I'm just trying to be as patient and soft as possible right now while remembering I can't control things. It just makes me feel physically nauseous, and I'm trying to stay supported in the meantime, so I appreciate the reply.

@butwhatif It sounds like you’re in the right mindset then. I know it’s hard to sit and wait on stuff like this, so be sure you’re being extra kind to yourself in the mean time.

@pureolife Thank you. Still haven't heard from him so it's just like one hour at a time at this point

@pureolife Update: sent another "are you okay" text and he finally responded saying he's burnt out and doesn't feel like talking to people. Somewhat relieved but still on edge for now. Making some cinnamon rolls to distract myself

@butwhatif It would be perfectly fine to voice how it’s making you feel: “hey, I noticed lately that you’re not responding to my messages like usual, and sometimes forgetting. I’m worried about you right now and not hearing from you makes me worry even more. Even when you’re not feeling up to it, can you just send me a message telling me that, so I know what’s going on? I’m here for you whenever you want to talk.”

@pureolife That's pretty much how it went. Just being patient for the time being. Thank you

I will try that. Thank you

No, we both are pretty socially anxious and don't really like talking on the phone but we always message. I'm not worried he's going to harm himself, but I'm worried because in the past when we were friends, he went AWOL for months once. I've known him for like 8 years, dating on/off for 3, but I feel like this particular thing that happens occasionally when he's very depressed makes me feel absolutely bonkers

@butwhatif well I feel like things can get miscommunicated through texting and messaging so calling is definitely a better way to communicate but if it makes u feel uncomfortable then I understand, I’m sorry this is happening but know it isn’t about you, he obviously has issues too that he needs to work out ❤️

@rlr Thank you. You're right. He still hasn't even read my message on Twitter. It's just a matter of time but I'm coping as best as I can ❤️