I feel so broken

Hi all. It is my first week on here and I don’t think I was anticipating how broken I would feel when I started this process. I hope I can do this, but I have been at listening to these obsessions about my health for 30 of my 45 years on the planet. I thought I had things more together, but this year has been real bad for so many reasons and my cracks are really showing. I am not sure what my question is..maybe I just need to know people have come back from where I am.

HRG

Date posted: 28w

I’m 44. I started in December. I was broken and in a bad space. Life does not just become more magical over night. But what does happen is that you begin to see the magic in life because of how supported you feel. I go 2x a week. My therapist is next level. I have grown so much!!!

Jeffrey

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 28w

@HRG Congratulations!

ckmclean

Date posted: 28w

@HRG Thank you for such a great reply. I do feel very supported here for sure. I am thankful or you all!

megan22

Date posted: 28w

Hi! Yes, I believe you can do this! Also please know you are not alone and I’m so proud of you for taking steps to get better. It’s hard work but worth it. I promise as someone who has been diagnosed 7 years with major episodes that have lasted from a few weeks to a few years to hang in there. You’ve got this!

ckmclean

Date posted: 28w

@megan22 Thank you so much Megan. It means everything to hear other people have improved their lives during this process. It is good to hear of progress and regression, so we know what to expect. I appreciate you.

megan22

Date posted: 28w

@ckmclean Anytime! I finally had a huge break through 2 days ago. I came face to face with a nightmare I had been spiraling over and worked through it with my therapist and did not get stuck in a spiral! Went from cold running panic attack to okay in an hour! You’ve got this too ❤️💪

Anonymice

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 28w

Goodness do I know how that feels. I am about a year into this diagnosis and treatment and I can feel real progress. Some days are still quite hard but many are way easier than they used to be. Keep going! Sending you love

ckmclean

Date posted: 28w

@Anonymice Thank you for sharing. It means a lot to hear that you are not alone.

Eschmatter25

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 28w

Tiny little baby steps…

Jeffrey

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 28w

I have been where you are and you can indeed come back! I am almost 57 and I have had ocd for 45 years and when I found NOCD everything started to get better. Remember while you are going through therapy and learning ERP it is very possible that it will will feel worse before it feels better because erp is teaching us new ways to deal with intrusive thoughts. ERP teaches us to NOT compulse but rather to allow the anxiety to be there and paying no attention to it or giving it any relevance. Intrusive thoughts are just that - intrusive thoughts. You are not broken. You are healing. It takes time but I need you to trust me that it does get better. I am happy to chat with you anytime.

ckmclean

Date posted: 28w

@Jeffrey Thanks Jeff, I really appreciate that. I would love to chat some time.

Anonymous

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 28w

I’m 30, only started ERP bc I had a baby and OCD was ruining my life. It’s been really hard but we can do this!!

ckmclean

Date posted: 28w

@Anonymous With support like this we can!

JazzyJez86

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 28w

I’m 38 and have had OCD for 38 years but just got diagnosed in September. I’ve been doing ERP for 6 or so months and it definitely has its highs and lows and spirals and everything in between. It will not be easy to confront your fears (I also have intense health anxiety) but your therapist will be there to support you. Just remember it’s not your fault and to keep moving forward, it will get better 💖

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