Usually my thoughts go from statements, which I fight all the time, to doubts like “do I” or “i don’t know” but I don’t fight this. I’m not sure if this is progress or it’s the truth. Anyone else feel like this?
The best way to combat ocd is to sit with the uncertainty about the thoughts. “I don’t know” is a great thing bc you aren’t giving in to reassurance and leaving the possibility that it COULD happen, but that there may be a small chance of it occurring. The truth is, there is no “true” way to determine if the thoughts are true—we sit with uncertainty every day, like when walking outside, we don’t know if a bird will randomly poop on us, and when we’re eating food, we don’t know ALL the ingredients inside it, etc.
With my harm ocd, I’ve struggled with doubts that I deserve good things, but something that’s really helped me is the fact that if I don’t deserve this happiness, then do other people deserve happiness? Do other people deserve it if I don’t think I deserve it? And we will often be so hard on ourselves while being the opposite to other people. Imagine yourself as your friend—would you say that your friend doesn’t deserve happiness, this dessert, this hug, this gift, etc? Most likely, you wouldn’t say that. Try thinking of yourself as a friend when it comes to the doubting statements.
@coolbeanscasp :) If it comes to doubts concerning “oh if I thought this does that mean I want to do it”, remember that you are in control of your actions, and remember your moral compass and how you don’t want to do it—a bad person wouldn’t be questioning if they wanted to do something bad—they would just do it. There is a difference between acting on a thought and simply having the thought.
@coolbeanscasp :) I also have harm ocd but lately I have fears that I’m not able to handle life and there’s doubt around that and a fear of losing control as a result. I don’t know how I’m suppose to work around this doubt or do I just let it be there.
@Holl1 For the fears about not being able to handle life, look at your entire time here on earth. You’re still alive and you have survived 100% of the days that have happened, whether they’re good or bad days. So no matter what happens, you will make it thru the day. Also it’s important to remember to observe your thoughts—imagine you are watching it thru a window, not trying to change anything, just simply noticing it’s there but not doing anything to “fix” it. Reassuring yourself would look like you breaking thru the window to make things “right”, but you just have to work on simply standing and looking thru the window.
@coolbeanscasp :) Thank you! Would I treat it as the same as my brain would usually say “yeah but you didn’t have harm OCD before this” or “you didn’t use to think like this”
@Holl1 you can’t control having harm ocd ofc, you can’t control the thoughts, so instead of phrasing it kind of like you’re kinda blaming yourself, I think it would be better to phrase it like “oh you didn’t think you would live thru [specific moment] but you did” or even like laughing at the ocd like “oh haha there goes ocd again! telling me I can’t handle life when I am obviously here right now!” etc
@coolbeanscasp :) Thank you this has helped me a lot!!
@Holl1 ofc!! glad I could help ❤️
I feel like I’ve lost who I am , even since my depression and ocd started. I don’t even know what I like anymore:(( I doubt everything I think and it’s so draining because I just want to feel like my old self again😭 I feel like I have no motivation to get better which is bothering me so much because I want too but something is holding me back from doing what I need to do :/ with all my thoughts and doubts , I feel like I can’t trust myself . I don’t know if I’m the only one that feels this much pain
I know the solution is to always say “yeah that could be true, but I am choosing to live my life anyway.” However, I feel like my biggest issue is my brain always assuming that it is immediately true when I do that. Like if I say “maybe I’m attracted to teenagers, it’s possible,” then my brain INSTANTLY starts rationalizing that thought and defending it and being like “oh okay so you think this now and it makes sense because xyz, and now that’s who you are and your real desire is now and always will be teenagers.” I feel really alone in this area of feeling like my brain “accepting the thoughts” means my brain immediately accepts them as true. I obviously don’t want to think they’re true but I feel so stuck now.
I’ve been getting stuck in my understanding of OCD lately. When I have intrusive thoughts, although I have OCD, I’m not supposed to label them as part of my condition? Instead I just say maybe/maybe not? It feels like it takes the wind out of my sails a bit in recovery? Like having cancer, but when I go to chemo, I’m supposed to say “maybe I have cancer, maybe I don’t.” Would anyone be able to speak to this and increase my insight and understanding? Thank you!
Share your thoughts so the Community can respond
