real

@Gmoki Im joking abt the marriage thing sry i just rlly loved this post

@Gmoki - erm methinks this was a compulsion

@Gigantosaurus Wait what was the compulsion? Sorry haha If I did I don’t even realize im doing it sometimes

@Gmoki - you're good i don't know tbh i'm still working on understanding what is and what isn't a compulsion too. Personally though, I've noticed I do that a lot too - I'll make a joke or say something ridiculous and then think "oh no that's inappropriate or weird" or "you can't say that" and then I'll immediately be like "that was a joke!" or "you know I didn't mean that right?" just to "make sure" they didn't take it the wrong way. And im like pretty sure that's a compulsion because it's an intrusive thought and then a behavior to try to make it better. Could be different for you but it's definitely one I've been working on

@Gigantosaurus No you are amazing and you are doing amazing for this, because you spot it and know when you’re compulsing. Im still honestly learning when to spot it, so thank you so much :) yes you’re correct, I just felt I have to do it because I don’t want to hypothetically offend someone if I unintentionally crossed a boundary or something. It’s so annoying to deal with because I wish I could be like everyone and else and not care this much

@Gmoki - I know I totally get it. (I just changed my profile pic lol) It was super confusing and overwhelming when I first got diagnosed because I couldn't figure out which thoughts and behaviors were "okay" and which ones I should be fighting. I assume you're new to all this? I will say it took me some time to be able to sort out the differences, but I got my diagnosis back in November and I'm slowly figuring it out over time. The thing that helped me was noticing whenever I felt anxious and thought I had to fix something, I tried to put into words what I was afraid of and if I could come up with a good reason that the action needed to be done other than just "i'm uncomfortable or scared." If I didn't have any other big reason, I tried to sit with the discomfort and not do the "feel better" behavior. Doing this a lot over time helped me notice which things I feared and compulsed over a lot and helped me work on stopping those things. If it feels awful that means you're doing it right!!

@Gmoki - and also side bar- I know where you're coming from. It seems like our brains work similarly and I've felt all that very heavy. I just try to remember that yes it sucks but everyone's got their cross to bear, we're stuck with where we are right now whether we like it or not so the best thing we can do is just put the little bit of effort in every day and eventually things will get better :)

@Gigantosaurus I adore this response. Ur pfp is so cute hehe is that ur dog? And yes you are SO CORRECT. It’s about sitting with our thoughts and potiential scenarios, not try to correct anything and let it be. You should be so proud of yourself, these baby steps are what matter and they will pay off in the end. I am trying to be more like you with this, as you guessed correctly I am quite new to it all haha. I got my diagnosis in march of this year, which is so crazy because it changed my life a LOT more than I realize haha. My whole life I’ve had adhd/executive dysfunction and the typical anxiety/depression combo, and so I thought me doing all these compulsions and thinking these extreme thoughts was just side effects of me being “extremely sensitive” or “very adhd”. There came a point though, where I was like “this can’t be normal at all because no one thinks through any of this stuff to the point I do”. Like seriously, it feels like all my friends can make stupid jokes, basic mistakes, and have relationships with people without apologizing or feeling bad about it. Then I’d tell myself “no this is normal and im overreacting, everyone has these thoughts they just don’t show it like me”. Well I was so very wrong haha! Anyway though, you should be so proud of yourself. Are you doing erp? I started in march and also got medicated, I had no idea how much it effected me until recently. ERP has these response prevention messages, and they’re exactly what you spoke about with the uncertainty like, for example, “maybe this person will be offended I offered a hand in marriage as a part of my joke, maybe not”. You seem like a pro at this point haha. It’s so good to meet someone who understands the struggle, so thank u :) we def have similar brains haha. I think the biggest form of self love (that we’re still learning to practice and accept) is working to understand yourself/your brain the most. We’re in this together :) crazy how this meme started this convo but I wouldn’t change it at all hahaha

@Gmoki you are all good dude !! :D