sertraline, zoloft

Hi everyone, I’m new to the community. I was diagnosed with OCD just a couple of months ago and have been doing some reading and other research to try and understand the disorder. With this, I have been actively seeing a great therapist who has been helpful to build tools to deal with my intrusive thoughts ( contamination OCD is my worst theme). Do help learn to deal with the compulsions, I start on Sertraline or “Zoloft” I believe since November 2024. Currently I’m on 50mg and have been doing this for just over a month. My question for those who are also taking Sertraline and it has been successful, how do you know it has really provided a benefit and how long did it take to get there? I sometimes feel the medication works, and sometimes I feel it doesn’t (maybe that’s my OCD trying to mess with things). Thanks!

I suffer since 10 - 15 yrs from specific fears. It was years that my OCD constantly wanted to be checked if I have HIV or not. I had a lot of sex and I thought this is normal. But I ruminated in my backhead about and was testing like 5 - 10 times a year. After the test I felt everytime so relieved. In Corona I was addicted to porn and even I lost control and was watching pretty hard stuff. I was chatting with a girl and we fantasized about really disturbing things. I never wanna meet her and for me was sure it's just kinda onlinestuff. I was in a relationship 3 years now. And I lost fear of HIV. But then came Morality OCD, Real Event (this chat) and after some times POCD. This combination was knocking me out, I felt like the badest person on earth. I did everything wrong and searched for relief and reassurance. It put me to the point of suicidal. I never ever hurting somebody, but my brain was making me a monster. I had to quit the relationship because I just couldn't give her what she deserved. I was in a clinic for 3 months. And we tested medication with ERP (before I took escitalopram for years). Anafranil was working first, then too many side-effects. I tried even without meds, but was so depressed. Now on sertralin for 5 weeks, but only 2 weeks on therapeutic dose 200mg. And wow, now I really feel so confused in the brain. I feel like how big my OCD became. The specific thoughts are not anymore, BUT it sticks on EVERYTHING atm. It's delusional how it feels in the brain. I really hope so deep my brain makes finally a reset and I need to wait it out. I could live with OCD for a long time but the last 1-2 yrs it took absolutely everything. I remark that POCD doesn't stick anymore like before but my brain is now constructing a very bad future because of past mistakes (that I all discussed with family, friends for relief over and over and over again). So it's like my OCD is now Real Event (The sexchat) again. Anyone was on the same point in life?

Is it normal that my brain is now focussing on real event or something about morality and cancel culture, and not anymore about POCD? It's like a sneaky trying to find something other that scares me. I am now week 4 of 200mg sertraline and I still feel that my system is very in alarm mode but the thoughts are not repetitive anymore.