Can people pleasing be a compulsion?

Have you ever agreed when you wanted to disagree, found yourself over-apologizing, or gone along with plans that didn’t work for you, just to avoid disappointing anyone? You might have experienced “people pleasing,” a behavior where you prioritize others’ needs over your own in an effort to avoid any social discomfort or interpersonal tension. For people with OCD, people pleasing can become a compulsion, driven by fears of making mistakes, letting others down, or not being “good enough.” Trying to please others may seem like a good way to manage these fears, but it actually ends up feeding them. Each time you put your needs last, it reinforces the idea that your worth depends on a flawless performance. In reality, you don’t need to be “perfect” to deserve connection and acceptance. Your worth is inherent, and specialized OCD treatment can help you embody that more fully. Learn more about how OCD can lead to people pleasing, and what you can do to break the pattern.

LauraLoo

Date posted: 7w

My entire life. Literally

Mackenzie - ...

Date posted: 7w

@LauraLoo Same.

LaceyW83

Date posted: 7w

Me! Had no idea it was a compulsion!

Mackenzie - ...

Date posted: 7w

@LaceyW83 You are not alone! This is a very common compulsion. People pleasing and I go wayyyyy back. 🤦🏻‍♀️😂

ERP is the w...

User type: OCD Conqueror

Date posted: 6w

The thing about this compulsion sometimes bad things actually do happen . Not terrible things but having someone upset at me is very distressing . I told my wife the other day to “dry the table “ after my toddler spilt water on the table . My wife had a rag in her had drying the floor . I started drying the table but she said annoyed it is still wet . I asked her to dry the table . That was a boundary because this happens often . She was upset but I felt like you do not need to complain about it just solve the problem. Anyway there sooooo many moments where I don’t want to do something that I agree to so I can avoid conflict . Did not know this was a compulsion

Bb280120

Date posted: 7w

This is my wound I just couldnt change this habbit of mine If you make a list about handle mechanisms I would be happy and I guess The other members od this app too

Moonflower Jess

Date posted: 7w

This can stem from family or friend abuse in the past and present, feeling like they are rooting in your mind or life.

buggyladyxo

Date posted: 7w

Absolutely my existence

sadartist

Date posted: 6w

Parents caused this in all of you by the way.

buggyladyxo

Date posted: 6w

@sadartist For some maybe, for some its society and how students and school socialized us, for some it was to survive their harsh environments, for some its just ocd because ocd can be genetic and many other reasons. there is not blanket reason as to why this happens to people

sadartist

Date posted: 6w

@buggyladyxo You’re right. It’s all very individualistic. I’m a people pleaser because impressing my parents was the way I solicited affection

buggyladyxo

Date posted: 6w

@sadartist I feel you 💛 I’m a people pleaser because I did it to survive my own harsh/violent environment, to please my mother, and to not be bullied. It’s so many things! I wish us both well on this unlearning journey. It’s fuckin hard!!!! 🫂

J13

Date posted: 5w

🙌🏼

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