Anxious,self-aware,processing (Capricorn-ing out)

I’m just now processing some memories I had compartmentalized. New & Old memories. I am now piecing together patterns with people in said memories. I’m honestly in-between passive aggressive route which are not health-(accountability I know)—( I was raised to not express any negative feelings), Confronting said feelings with people who are definitely not ready in anyway shape or form (gaslighting and amnesia on their part) or Just spas out on everyone involved in a major way. I know this because I disassociate mentally to keep me at bay. OKAY BYE 🤷🏽‍♀️

Amara

Date posted: 25w

I totally get how overwhelming it can feel when old, compartmentalized memories start resurfacing especially when patterns with people start becoming clearer. Feeling torn between staying quiet, confronting them, or wanting to explode is such a human response when you’ve spent so long holding things in or being invalidated. The fact that you’re even noticing these things and trying to figure out a healthier way says a lot about your strength and self-awareness. Try to take care of yourself first—whether that’s through journaling, mindfulness, or even just some deep breaths. You don’t have to solve everything right now. Remember, everything is going to be okay, and healing takes time.

Ms. Cap♑️

Date posted: 24w

@Amara Thanks for your input/pov… I try to be fair and use logic with most situations but what’s keeping me stuck in this infinite cycle is the fact that these are strong family/“friend” dynamic that can’t be completely avoided or severed especially in the parental relationships. I need to get passed it in a healthy way for the sake of my own children. I just want to be healthy and not anxious (obsessive) over it. Some of the things done to me (treatment from others) have been heinous but if I did it back I would be the worst human being in their world. When really I don’t want to be bothered at all with it. I spend weeks in the house in one room. I can’t keep a job without having this affect my whole life because I get caught up on it and have breakdowns frequently. I now understand why people move to remote places and don’t communicate with people of their past.

Amara

Date posted: 24w

@Ms. Cap♑️ You're welcome. I hear you deeply. It’s incredibly hard when the pain comes from people you can’t fully cut off especially family. Feeling stuck in the loop of trying to be fair while carrying the weight of things others won’t even admit to is exhausting.Wanting peace it shows your strength. The fact that you care about healing for your kids and for yourself means more than you know. Here are a few gentle ways to support yourself through this: Limit how much space triggering people take up—even in your thoughts. Give yourself permission to emotionally detach without guilt. Remote peace isn’t always physical. Protecting your mental space matters too. Micro habits to reclaim power: 3-minute morning check-in: “How do I feel?” “What do I need?” Move emotion through the body: Stretch, walk, or play calming music to shift stuck energy. Box Breathing or 4-7-8 Method Inhale – 4 seconds Hold – 7 seconds Exhale – 8 seconds Repeat 3–5x to calm your nervous system Sometimes your body holds the pain more than your thoughts do. Explore somatic tools or trauma-informed content . Use writing or even voice notes to process and gain clarity: “What’s mine to carry and what’s not?” “What would I say if I knew I wouldn’t be judged or interrupted?” “What does peace look like for me, even if no one else changes?” You've got this. One step at a time.

Ms. Cap♑️

Date posted: 24w

@Amara I will implement this and checking in a few days to see the progress

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